10 Years!

Celebrating our engagement at the Victorian Manor in Lemont (2000)

Ten years ago today Paul and I got married. Ten years ago I never would have dreamed our journey to becoming parents would take 6 years and involve tens of thousands of dollars and hundreds of shots. I view our children as the best thing that happened in our lives these past 10 years by a long shot. I also never would have guessed that Paul would have been a student for almost all of the first 10 years of marriage. When we met (1997) he was 27 and hadn't been in school since he was 18. We dated a long time (4.5 years) in part because he started working on his Bachelor's degree 11 months after we met. He finished that degree a few years after we were married. He left his job in December 2005 and has been a full-time student since January 2006 (more than half of our marriage).

One of my favorite pictures from the past 10 years (Paul and Jenna)

When we were dating, we had agreed that I'd be a SAHM, but we didn't know at that point that Paul would be a FT student while we had children. I haven't been a FT student since May 1992. I earned my graduate degrees while working FT (finished my Master's in 1994 and my Doctorate in 2002). It hit me very recently that maybe this is one of the reasons God caused us to wait so long to become parents. For example, our first child was due in February 2006. If we had a baby then, I'd have been a working mom for more years than I think I will be in light of us not becoming parents until 2008. It's encouraging to get little glimpses of the possible reasons that God's timing was very different than our desires. Although I can't say I'd have picked traveling over children, we definitely got to travel more due to being married almost 7 years before we had a baby. We treasure our memories from our trips, as you can see from this list of my top ten memories from the past ten years.

Picture used in an adoption profile (2006)

During our first few years of marriage, we owned one desktop computer. The only time Paul ever used it was to complete a homework assignment (which happened very rarely) or to play a game (not over the Internet but by using software). We didn't have high speed internet the first 3 years we were married. Paul didn't have a cell phone the first seven years of our marriage, and I had one only for a short time during that time span. Now we both have cell phones, but we still only use them to talk (we don't text or access the internet via our phones). We definitely make use of our high speed internet, and we both use our separate computers a lot. Paul didn't start using e-mail until September 2006, and now he feels the need to check it even while we're on vacation. Actually this leads to another possible blessing of our delay with having children. Paul currently works 7 days a week. This is possible because he's doing computational chemistry. All he needs is a computer. Hopefully this means he'll be able to graduate sooner, but for now it means we don't see much of him. I'm assuming (and hopefully right) that he'll be able to spend more time with us once he has a job. In that case, it's a blessing that we didn't start having children until about the time he was starting his doctoral program as hopefully this means fewer years when he doesn't have too much time to spend with us.

1. The most precious memory I have from the past 10 years would be seeing Paul with Nadia while we were in the hospital (2008). He had always talked about how he enjoyed kids more when they were past the baby stage. I think a lot of men share that sentiment. Well he was immediately in love with his little peanut. I wish I could have captured a little video that showed the love and joy that he felt when he held her. I can still picture it. I hope I never forget that moment. I didn't see him holding her for the first time since I was unconscious. I wish I could have seen that. I wish a whole bunch of people hadn't held her before I did. Anyhow, we were limited in how much time we could spend holding her (in the NICU), and it surprised me how Paul was wanting his fair share of time holding her. I was touched. I am not sure if it was because she was a girl or because she was the first, but it was a really special moment that wasn't duplicated with Ian. Days went by between times when he held Ian. I think in part it was because Nadia was at home. I had to ask him to please take the time to hold Ian. That never happened with Nadia. It was really special to see how much he loved her right from the start.

2. The time with Ian was in the hospital was really stressful. It was somewhat stressful when Nadia was in the NICU, but the second time around it was a million times harder because of the fact Nadia wasn't allowed in the hospital, and every day we spent at the hospital was another I was separated from Nadia. Up until that point I had never spent even one day apart from her. The day Ian was released from the hospital was a really, really special moment (2009). It finally felt like we were a family of four. I was reunited with Nadia, and the stress of being in the hospital was over. It felt heavenly to go home and be a family of four for the first time.

August 2009 (I was pregnant with Ian at the time)

3. Honeymoon in St. Lucia (2001) - horseback riding on the beach and visiting a volcano were two of my highlights. We slept more on this vacation than any other week in the past 10 years. Even though our unit cost us a little over $100 for 7 nights (through my time share), it was the largest we've stayed in thus far - 3 floors including our private plunge pool ( we want one of those again!) and a maid who did our dishes every day! Of all the trips we've been on, this was our favorite.

Aunt Ruth and Susie (2006)

4. Fun with the kids (2011) - Some of my happiest memories (so far) with both kids together have been this summer. None of them include Paul, but since they involve the kids it still seems fair to include them in this list. If I had to pick three special moments, I'd pick #1 when we were at Knoebels and all three riding a ride together, #2 swimming in the pool and both kids were laughing while we were doing "ring around the rosy," and #3 our times at the playground such as Nadia sitting on my lap on the swing. Priceless. Of course there are many other more daily precious moments such as seeing the kids laughing together.

On top of a pyramid in Mexico (November 2002)

5. Trip to Mexico (2002) - Paul wouldn't rank this trip as high as I have, but it was a glorious trip in my opinion. It's the only time we stayed at an all-inclusive resort. It was luxurious and one of our cheapest trips ironically. Some of the best snorkeling I've done in my life happened on this trip such as at Akumal Bay. We had relaxing days at the resort and also rented a car to visit three Mayan pyramids.

I tried on my wedding dress yesterday (for the first time in 10 years). It fits!

6.Trip to England/France (2002) - This was our favorite trip to Europe. We want to go back to England again some day. The Bayeux Tapestry, Mont St. Michael, and Sainte Chapelle (in Paris) were some of my favorite sites in France.

7. Antigua (2009) - This vacation was very special because it was the first one we took Nadia on (not that she'll remember it at all) and because while we were on this trip I found out I was pregnant with Ian. A BFP will always make a trip very, very special!!! The first day we were there I was questioning the sanity of traveling with a 10 month old, but then she started sleeping in the crib and all was well. She enjoyed the pool and the beach, and it was special to have Paul's parents join us as well. I can't say it was our favorite island that we ever visited, but other things made it a very special trip.

8. Italy (2003) - This was probably Paul's favorite trip in terms of liking the food the best. That would be Mexico for me. This was by far our most expensive trip to date, but we saw a lot of sites we wanted to see in Rome, Venice, Pompeii, Vesuvius, etc. I'd like to take the kids to Italy some day, and I'd like to see some parts that we didn't see on this trip. Paul is heading to Italy next month. I wish we could join him!

9. Aruba (2006) and China (2006) - Aruba isn't necessarily the most interesting island, but we had a really relaxing trip. We spent 3 weeks in China as well that same summer. I taught for 2 weeks. Probably the highlight of that trip was our tour of the Great Wall, especially as we happened to be there on one of the only days during the trip that we had good visibility (the pollution there is unbelievable). This was Paul's least favorite trip in terms of the food we ate, but we had a great time seeing many famous sites in Beijing. I have no aspiration to return, unless it's to adopt a child.

Paul's favorite picture of us (January 2011)

10. Spain (2004), St. Maarten/St. Kitts/Nevis/Anguilla (2005), and St. Thomas/St. John/Tortola/Virgin Gorda (2008) - There were special moments on each of these trips, but none of them would rank as being one of our favorite trips. However, I had to list all our vacations on this list (except for the last two) because vacations are very special. We get to spend sooo much more time together than usual on a vacation (except for the Florida trip in 2010). I always treasured our family vacations when I was a child, but ever since we've been married, I've felt even more strongly about how valuable they are. It will be strange not to have Paul with us in Florida later this month, but it was really frustrating to have him there in body (but yet occupied with his schoolwork) as was the case in May 2010. I look forward to the day (after he's graduated) when he can hopefully really truly take a vacation from work again. Even though I have no desire to ever go on a cruise again, there were special moments on that trip as well such as seeing Ian interact with the parrot and monkey. There are soooo many places I'm looking forward to taking the kids, particularly when they are old enough to remember things.

If someone who was dating or engaged asked me for a few pieces of advice, I think this is what I would share regarding things I've learned over the past 10 years. These are by no means the most important lessons of marriage, but they are five things that pop into my mind.

1. No matter how well you think you know somoene after dating them for a long period of time (4.5 years in our case), there's still so much you have to learn about them. As one small example, I learned on our honeymoon that Paul will not eat spaghetti unless there is parmesan on top of it. I should add that spaghetti is one of his favorite foods. I knew he liked parmesan, but I didn't realize it was an absolute necessity. One other (more recent) example would be regarding swimming. I assumed Paul would go swimming with us at least once each week. I'm glad I didn't know he wouldn't be swimming with us this summer when I made the decision to join because I had factored in all four of us using the membership when I was contemplating the cost. It would have been a shame to have missed out on our fun times in the pool this summer just because Paul doesn't come with us.

2. Those differences of opinion that you discover while dating that you decide you can "deal with" will likely bother you more when you are married than you anticipated. One example would be us having different ideas regarding how many children we wanted to have. On the other hand, you will be soooo appreciative of the values that you do share. I am grateful, for example, that we are 100% united in our decision to homeschool our kids. That could have been a contentious decision, but we are 100% in agreement.

3. There's nothing wrong with having a picture in your mind as to what will happen in the future as long as you realize it might turn out very differently. When I bought our first house in January 2001, I had no idea that in the first 7 years of marriage we would live in 3 different houses. We thought we'd live there for many years while Paul worked for his Dad. We thought I'd "retire" from my position as a principal prior to having our first child so that I could be a SAHM. I had no idea in 2001 that Paul would eventually be getting his PhD in Chemistry (considering at that point he hadn't even finished his BS in Math and hadn't talked about wanting to go back to school). I would never have guessed that I would have been employed outside the home for the first 10 years of our marriage or that we'd have been married for almost 8 years before we became parents. Life is an adventure full of unexpected twists and turns!

October 2010

4. If your husband does something you deem extravegant, just enjoy it. Several years ago Paul ordered flowers to be delivered to me while I was at home for our anniversary. When I saw the amount on the credit card statement, I honestly thought there was a mistake so I asked him how much they cost. It turns out I was clueless as to what florists charge to deliver a bouquet of flowers. I deeply regret that I said anything because he's never given me any flowers since then, and I used to love getting flowers every once in a while.

Antigua (May 2009) - newly pregnant with Ian!

5. Even the things you know about a person before you get married will not necessarily be true of them 10 years down the road. We all change! It sounds obvious, but I think there are certain things we associate with a person. For example, Paul used to be a night owl - before we were married and for the first several years of our marriage. However, that hasn't been true the last two years. I used to go to bed hours before Paul every night, and when we were first married this bugged me because it seemed "unromantic." It didn't take very long for me to discover that I find it easier to fall asleep when I'm alone. I actually prefer going to bed at different times. Most nights now Paul either goes to bed at the same time as me or sometimes even before me. Part of it is because over the past several months I've started staying up later than usual (for many years my bedtime was 9:30pm), and Paul is also going to bed much earlier. I would have said "no way!" if someone had said Paul will get more sleep than you, but it's true that he's gotten more sleep than me the past 3 years - because of him sleeping more than he used to and me getting a lot less sleep due to things like nursing and such. The bottom line is that I need to learn how to fall asleep in bed, even when Paul is also in bed.

I am really looking forward to the next ten years as a family of four! It will be so much fun to make special memories together! I hope we are able to go on many wonderful vacations across the USA as well as other countries. One place I know we both want to go is Hawaii for example! Nadia will be a teenager when we hit the 20 year mark. I am not wishing for these years to fly by. I want to savor as many moments along the way as I can.

Vocabulary Explosion

Ian's vocabulary has REALLY expanded over the past two weeks. He's not where Nadia was when she was this age, but I think he'd now be considered "normal." I'm going to ask his speech therapist about it tomorrow. Maybe we can discontinue the speech therapy? That would be great! I'd say his vocabulary includes at least 40 words now, and probably about 10 of those are pronounced really clearly such as ball, doll, well (said while pointing to a picture of a well), no, and eye. Here are some other things I am thankful for today.

2. When I filled up my gas tank on Monday on the way to the swimming pool, I noticed I had gone a little over 500 miles since my last fill-up, and I only needed to put a little over 9 gallons of gas in my tank. I've been averaging about 51 miles to the gallon over the past month. This would be an even happier thing if the gas prices would go down a dollar or two, but in light of the higher gas prices (I paid $3.61 on Monday), I am very grateful for my hybrid.

3. With the exception of this morning when Nadia woke us up (for a tissue of course) at 6:00, the norm now is that I go get Nadia sometime around 7:00 (she's playing quietly in her bed when I get her), and I get Ian when he wakes up (sometime between 7:00-7:30 most days). This is a WONDERFUL thing!

4. I haven't mentioned it lately, but I'm still really grateful for Money Saving Mom. This week I got two $10 prepaid Discover cards in the mail from a Kellogg's rebate I learned about months ago on her site. I've gotten $30 from that so far, and I never pay more than $1.50 per cereal box so that means I've been paying on average only 50 cents for a box of cereal this year. Other recent "deals" I learned about through her site include two free Christian books that are in the mail, a $10 off $10 coupon for Pier 1 which meant I got $11.50 worth of stuff for the kids (2 puzzles, 1 ball, and 1 little bus) for $1.50, I bought a $50 JCP voucher for $20, I bought a $10 Dunkin Donuts gift card for $5, etc. I'm also still thankful for CVS. We made our weekly trip there yesterday morning, and this week I did a special at our grocery store where I'll be getting a $10 gift card because I purchased $30 worth of P&G products (with coupons of course so I didn't actually spend $30).

5. Monday morning we went to the playground, and on the way home we passed a yard sale. I am not used to seeing yard sales on Mondays, but this was a great yard sale for us because they were mostly selling things for kids (books, games, toys, stuffed animals, etc.). I bought 8 books, 1 game, 10 little cars and trucks (they were 20 cents each), a set of 8 really nice 6 inch wooden road signs for $2.00, and an adorable Tonka truck wooden table and stool set for $10. If I hadn't just purchased some other new furniture for Nadia's room, I would have put this table and stools in the living room (next to the play kitchen), but I had already moved down the table and chairs that used to be in her room. For now this Tonka table and stools are in the basement, and I plan to move them into Ian's room whenever I feel it's time for the glider to come out of his room.

6. Even though I wouldn't have ordered all the new furniture had I known I was going to buy an adorable table and stool set for $10, I do love the new things. Paul put together Ian's new (transportation themed) bookshelf last week, I assembled Nadia's new doll bed yesterday, and Paul assembled Nadia's new rocking chair last night. The kids love all the new items. The only problem is Ian wants to climb in the doll bed, and I'm afraid he might break it. I'm trying to teach him it's only for dolls or stuffed animals. Nadia has really been into playing with dolls lately, so it was perfect timing. I have her new rocking chair and the doll bed in the dormer window area of her bedroom. I had a rocking chair in my room growing up, and I've been wanting her to have one for awhile. This one is larger than the one I had, so it should last longer. Even after I outgrew mine, I still enjoyed it as then I used it for my dolls. I am hoping she'll get a lot of use out of it. I splurged and got a pretty one, which was twice as expensive as a plain one, but it is adorable! Before I had the idea of a rocking chair for that part of her room, I was contemplating get her this table (since I was putting the white one that has been in her room downstairs). I'm really glad I didn't because #1 this table/chair set is REALLY expensive and #2 I love the table/chair set I got for $10, and we don't need 3 small tables in our house! Tonight Paul plans to assemble the final thing I bought - another bookshelf for Nadia's room. As you know, I love to buy the kids books, and since I recently moved some more games and puzzles onto the bookshelf in the living room, I've needed to make room for more books elsewhere!

7. I found out this morning that because I redesigned the social studies online course this summer (someone else taught it last summer), the Dean approved me to receive a stipend for that. It's nothing huge, but it's enough to pay for all the furniture I just bought for the kids!

8. Ian now loves the ball pit (aka our jacuzzi tub), and this has meant that showers have become much  more relaxing for me. Sometimes I take them before 7am, but if I take my shower after 7am, it can still work out alright now that Ian can play happily in the balls while I shower. Yahoo!!!

9. I'm thankful we've never made a trip to the swimming pool and not been able to swim. Twice this summer we've had to leave earlier than planned because it thundered, and yesterday we had to delay our entrance by 30 minutes (made an unplanned trip to Walmart), but we've never had a totally wasted trip (which is good because if we don't hit traffic it takes us 19 minutes one way).

10. Paul got a grant of 1,000 Euros for his conference next month! I had to call our banks this morning to figure out how to accept the wire transfer from Italy. We have accounts in local banks that aren't used to dealing with international transactions.

11. I may have saved the best for last. Yesterday I called Karen because even with Melatonin Ian's nap was only 25 minutes (in his crib), and then he slept about 30 more minutes in my arms. She suggested giving him a half a tablet (I tried to give him 1/3 of a tablet yesterday), and she said if he woke up after such a short nap that I should let him cry in the hopes that he would fall back asleep in his crib. I am not really sure what fraction of the pill I gave him today because there are no markings on the tablets. I just gave him the other half of the one I had cut yesterday. The other difference was I gave him one more sippy cup of EleCare (his fourth for the day) 30 minutes before I put him down. It worked! He napped for 70 minutes straight in his crib for the first time in many months! WOOHOO! Hopefully today wasn't a fluke.

Finally, I'll close with a quote the wife of one of my cousin's shared yesterday on Facebook. The author of the quote is C.S. Lewis. "The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only - and that is to support the ultimate career." I am not sure I can agree with the second sentence; it's usually hard to use the word "all" and not think of exceptions, but I definitely agree with the first sentence. I look forward with anticipation to the day when I will "just" be a wife, mom, and the teacher of our children.

6 Random Musings

1. I was about to make chocolate chip cookies with Nadia yesterday afternoon, and Paul asked what I was making. I had made peanut butter cookies last week, and he said he wanted those again. So I quickly searched online to see if I could find one to combine both ingredients that might satiate both of our cravings, and I did! I have to tell you that these cookies are by far THE BEST cookies I have ever made (according to my taste buds anyhow). I thought 2 cups of chocolate chips plus 2 cups of chopped peanut butter cups sounded a bit much, so I only put in 1 cup of chopped PB cups. I didn't realize what a big batch of cookies it makes. Anyhow they are delicious! If you like peanut butter and chocolate, you should try these some time! Jo, I apologize as I don't think there's a way to make a "responsible" version of these cookies.

2. I called the Pediatrician today to see what he thought of Ian taking melatonin. He told me what dosage to give him and said it wouldn't interfere with any of the other medications Ian is taking. He was supportive of giving it a try. I guess I'll be buying some melatonin. It can't hurt to try. It's encouraging to hear from you, Lisa, that it's helped you so much!

3. I know we shouldn't wish for a drought, especially when we live in a farming region, but I have to say two perks to a drought are #1 being able to go swimming more and #2 not needing to mow the lawn as often. Yesterday I mowed part of the lawn, and the grass was really high even though it had only been 5 days since I had last mowed.

4. When we saw the Allergist on July 14, he assumed the next biopsy would take place within a couple of weeks. I did take Ian to see a GI in Hershey on July 21, but his endoscopy is scheduled for August 29. So I called today to see if we should decrease the Pulmicort to once a day even though he hasn't had his next biopsy yet. They said yes! The doctor said as long as he has been on it for at least 4 weeks at the current dosage, we can decrease his dosage. We switched on June 23 from 3 times a day to 2 times a day, so it's definitely been more than 4 weeks. It's not the cost of the medication that is the issue (now that we get it practically for free from PSU), but rather it makes me feel like we are still making progress towards "the plan" that the Allergist outlined on July 14th even though we are still waiting for the next biopsy.

5. I've always believed I would see the child we lost in July 2005 in heaven some day. The statement from David in 2 Samuel 12 was always the main basis for my belief. I've been less confident about seeing all the IVF embryos. Maybe it's because I wasn't declared "pregnant" those times? I believe life starts at conception, and I certainly felt grief over the 13 that didn't make it to the point of being able to be frozen (and then transferred) as well as the 5 who were transferred but didn't "stick," especially the first 3. I still have that ultrasound showing their movement within me as they were being transferred.

Yesterday's Sunday School lesson was on children in Heaven - about how those who die before they are able to understand what Jesus did for us, automatically go to Heaven. He also touched on babies who are never born (miscarriages and abortions). He was adamant that life begins at conception, and that all those babies (miscarried/aborted) are in Heaven. That wasn't a new thought to me, but what WAS a new thought to me was the possibility that maybe we'll still experience holding those little ones in Heaven some day. He said we can't say for certain whether they'll look like adults or children when we meet them in Heaven, but he (Dr. David Jeremiah) quoted from Dr. Vernon McGee who said "I believe with all my heart that God will raise the little ones such that the mother's arms who have ached for them will have the opportunity of holding them. The father's hand which never held the little hand will be given the privilege. I believe that little ones will grow up in the care of their earthly parents, if they are saved." I almost started crying right in Sunday School. I hadn't thought that maybe just maybe the babies we have never met on earth will still be little ones in Heaven. I know we can't be sure that's true, but I think that would be really wonderful if it is true. Heaven will be the most wonderful place even if that's not true, but wow it eases the disappointment of not being able to snuggle more children here on earth to think that I might possibly be snuggling with my 19 other little ones in Heaven some day. My arms would be rather full, eh? :-) It's a good thing I'll have my glorifed body because I couldn't handle anywhere near 19 babies here on earth! One of those lives began in 2005, six of them began in 2007, and twelve of them began in 2009. I'm in no rush to meet them, as I want to savor the time with my two here on earth, but I do look forward to meeting them some day in Heaven. Anyhow, the next time I feel a pang of sadness that we don't have any frozen embryos left to transfer and aren't doing IVF again, I'm going to think about the 19 little ones in Heaven that I hope to hold some day.

6. I am improving at saying "no." Still having that review from the University of Pittsburgh sitting on my dining room table is helping. I MUST do that this week as the deadline is quickly approaching. Today I declined having a graduate assistant for the fall semester. With teaching two online courses, I think it will be a struggle to come up with 10 hours of work that she can do for me each week since GAs can't help with grading. Also, I asked two professors who emailed me last week regarding peer observations to see if they can find someone else. I told them that if they are really in a pinch I will do it for them, but I'd rather they try to find someone else first. I let them know I'm only teaching part-time this semester. I got an email yesterday from a colleague saying she is resigning to move back to her home country (South Korea). I was surprised. She was tenure track (but not tenured yet). I felt badly for our department chair when I read her email, and my first instinct was to offer to help in some way (meaning agree to teach one or more of her classes). Prior to having kids I had taught overload in situations like this. Then it hit me that I am already overwhelmed with my current schedule, and I'd be nuts to offer to add more to my plate. Old habits die hard. I'm working on saying "no."

5 Random Questions

1. What do you all do with the clothing your child outgrows? It seems for the large items that Craigslist is definitely the best option. In hindsight, the consignment shop was the worst by far. I am not sure if it was just the one I used, or if generally that's not a good option. The only other time I used a consignment shop was in 1996 in Annapolis, and I did pretty well back then selling my clothes after I lost weight. Thus far (after having listed more than 100 items at the consignment shop more than 3 months ago) I've only received about $38 from the consignment shop. I got about $175 from the yardsale, $175 from Craigslist, and $150 from eBay. I am trying to decide what to do the next time. I'd rather just donate things than go through the effort of the consignment shop. I will shop at that store again, but I don't think it's wise to sell things there. I haven't ever tried to sell baby clothes on Craigslist. Somehow it seems better to sell things like a highchair through that site. I guess I'll probably try eBay next as I didn't use eBay yet for selling the kids' clothes. Are there other options?

2. I am thinking of calling the pediatrician regarding Karen's suggestion of melatonin for Ian. Yesterday his nap was only 15 minutes. I let him cry after that hoping he'd go back to sleep. He never did. Today his nap was only 20 minutes. Nadia napped for 3 hours yesterday and 3 hours today. He's doing great at night, but naps are a disaster. Have any of you ever tried melatonin for your child to help them nap? Do you have any other suggestions? He took two naps on Friday - one on the way to Knoebels (about 40 minutes) and one in the stroller at Knoebels (I didn't time it) so it's not a case of that Ian doesn't need a nap. He just can't seem to take it in his crib!

3. I have been keeping the nipples from Ian's 3 new sippy cups in the dishwasher in the hopes that it would soften them to the point that he would drink from them. I tried to get him to drink from one of them again this morning, and he still won't. Does anyone have any other suggestions? The four sippy cups he will drink from are identical to these three, except they've been used off and on over the past 2 years (first by Nadia and now by Ian).

4. The surgeon asked us to schedule a follow-up visit for 3 months after Ian's last urological surgery. It's been 2 months now. I haven't scheduled that appointment yet, and I have to admit I feel like skipping it. I feel like it will be a super quick appointment, and I don't feel like driving for more than 6 hours (RT) for that. What would you do?

5. Ian still cries every time I drop him off at the church nursery or when Alexis or Gabby come over to babysit. Usually he doesn't cry very long, although on Thursday night (VBS) he cried so long that he even threw up over himself and the nursery worker (and spent the rest of the night walking around without a shirt on). The thing that amazes me is that Sarah is always the one whom I first drop him off with on Sunday mornings because she always does the nursery during Sunday School. He's been in the nursery for more than a year now, and he STILL cries for a few minutes when I drop him off. Did any of your kids have these separation issues for this long? Any suggestions? I am wondering at this point how many years this is going to last! I really would have thought he would have adjusted by now. Nadia never went through this. She adored Sarah right from the start. We started going to this church when she was about 6 months old.

Well I'm all ears if any of you have any input regarding any of these questions! Thanks! :-)

Nadia's First Pinata!

Today we went to the Fiesta that the library had as the conclusion to the summer reading program. It was a perfect day to spend an hour at the library because it rained cats and dogs most of the day. The Fiesta was from 11:00-1:00, but we got their late and left early. If I had to do it over again, I would have paid Gabby to babysit Ian so I could have just taken Nadia. It was really hard to help Nadia with the crafts and such and keep Ian out of trouble. He didn't get much out of the Fiesta aside from doing a little watercolor painting and licking two rice crackers (I read the package to make sure he could have those). He wanted some of the other food (to lick), but most things (vanilla wafers, chocolate chip cookies, etc.) I knew had some offending ingredient. The first 45 minutes were for 6 different craft stations - origami, painting, coloring, making a tissue paper flower, making a drum, etc. The next segment was for eating various foods - hummus, guacamole, rice crackers, salsa chips, bean dip, etc.

Then they got out two pinatas. Nadia was blindfolded and tried to hit a strawberry shaped pinata. The children ages five and under were hitting that pinata. I wish I had my camera!! We had to leave before they broke the pinata. The older kids were very close to breaking their pinata when we left, but the younger kids hadn't even made a dent in theirs. I am curious how long it took! The last part was for the awards. There were two sheets to keep track of things for both kids. One had various types of activities listed on it (attending a program at the library, reading a nonfiction book, etc.). Nadia did 10 of the 11 activities (she can't write a paragraph, lol). The other two sheets were for recording how many pages we read to the kids each day. I started that and ditched them because most of their books don't have page numbers on them, and I found it really tedious to count the pages as it was usually over 100 pages every time I read to Nadia. The awards today were based on how many pages they read. Maybe next summer I'll keep track of it, or maybe I'll wait until they're actually reading themselves. :-)

Ian likes the rides!

I took the kids to Knoebels today. We got there at 1pm, and Paul's parents and Shawn joined us around 3pm. Ian hasn't ridden too many rides at Knoebels in the past because he would try to climb out of the ride (while it was in motion). At the county fair a few weeks ago we discovered he now enjoyed riding a ride and wouldn't try to get out. That was part of the reason I decided to take the kids to Knoebels yesterday. It was our 4th trip this year, but we hadn't been since June. I bought the kids handstamps and used tickets for myself. It was by far our most expensive trip to Knoebels, but including food I spent $44.50, about how much most amusement parks charge for just one adult. It was a really fun day. The weather was beautiful. It was warm enough that we enjoyed getting soaked on the Skloosh and a little wet on the flume. I was grateful when Paul's family arrived because #1 the kids have different taste in rides so Shawn and I took Nadia on some rides that Ian couldn't do while Paul's parents took Ian on the rides he loves that Nadia now considers to be boring and #2 I was able to enjoy some of the concerts. My favorite was Jamie Slocum. I have to say that it was hard for me to leave the kids even for a little bit. I love watching them ride rides (or riding with them as the case may be).

Ian's favorite rides involved vehicles that went around in a circle, such as a firetruck or car. One time he was in a car, but he kept fussing because he really wanted to be in the tractor the boy in front of him was riding. A few times he smiled or laughed on the rides, but most of the time while he was riding the ride you couldn't tell that he was enjoying it. The ways you knew he enjoyed it was #1 fussing and pointing when he saw a ride he wanted to ride and #2 crying when I took him off when the ride was over. Thankfully after an hour or two he stopped crying when the ride was over as he grasped the concept that it isn't the end of the world when the ride is over because we'll be riding more rides. Ian enjoys being held on the carousel, but he's not ready to ride a horse yet. He wanted no part of the bouncy "pillow," but he loved the balls. Ironically when Nadia and I were sharing some peach soft serve ice cream, he fussed and pointed as if he wanted some. Of course I couldn't give him any, but it struck me as odd because at home he screams most of the time when I feed him with a spoon. In light of us being at the park for 7 hours, he only was fed solid food twice today. He had his usual 6 sippy cups of EleCare over the course of the day. He's had a regression lately with handling the small shells mixed in his pureed food.

Nadia's favorite ride continues to be the kiddie roller coaster. She rode it with Shawn this time, and I was enjoying the Jamie Slocum concert at the time, which meant I don't have a picture of her on that roller coaster yet (as I rode it with her for the first time in June). She also really enjoyed the rides where we got wet (to use her words). The slide was also one of her favorites. There are very few rides in the kiddie area that she still gets a thrill from, but she does still love the "pillow" (that you jump on), the balls and the whip. It was a really great day. We're going to go back in October on a Saturday, and Paul is going to join us as he missed our first 4 trips this year. Until they get to the place where they both love the same rides, it's definitely helpful to have at least two adults along so that each child can ride the rides they enjoy best. Nadia enjoyed eating some fried pierogies for the first time. When I make them at home, I just boil them. I was going to introduce her to funnel cake for the first time, but I ended up sharing mine with Cheri instead.

PopPop, Ian, Mommy, Shawn, and Nadia rode the giant Ferris Wheel together.

7.5 Teeth

Ian has another tooth! I am not sure when he got it. I don't put my finger in his mouth very often. He now has 3 teeth on the top, and the fourth one has almost broken through. In the near future I'll be able to say he has 8 teeth - four on the top and four on the bottom (all incisors). For quite a long time he had only two teeth (on the bottom) so really he's gotten these 6 teeth in a short amount of time comparitively speaking.

His list of words is also growing. The words that are the clearest (ones I think others would be able to understand) are "hi," "eye," "no," and "shoe." Others include "na"(Nadia), "bo"(boat), "a" (car), "uh" (truck), "no" (nose), and "mih" (milk).

He's started walking around the house in my shoes. I have to get a picture of that because I have pictures of Nadia when she first started doing that. It's so cute!

Nadia had a really rough night last night, which translated to an even rougher night for me because I was also suffering the side effects of having taken a Claritin D yesterday. I did it to spare myself from another ruptured eardrum, but I need to figure out if there's another medication that would be as effective without giving me so many side effects (feeling loopy, jittery, etc.). I only took one and the ill effects lasted more than 24 hours, but thankfully my ears aren't popping any more, and my nose isn't running incessantly either. I think the lawn mowing was the culprit. Tonight I told Nadia that if she got me up, I'd take away her little pillow. I took her to the bathroom right before I took her to bed, and I gave her a stack of tissues. She was in an awful mood this morning and kept telling me how tired she was. Thankfully she took a longer than usual nap and was back to her normal cheerful self after that. She's really enjoyed VBS this week. We're skipping it tomorrow to go to Knoebels. Ian's speech therapist said she'll also be there tomorrow. Our local Christian radio station has a day there each summer with lots of free concerts, and tomorrow is that day! The concert I'm really looking forward to is Jamie Slocum. :-)

When the kids were at the birthday party at the Children's Museum, I noticed that they had fun setting a table with play food. It hit me that I should move the child size table and chairs from Nadia's room down to the living room, near their play kitchen. They sit in the chairs to read in her room, but it would be more useful to have that downstairs for playing games, doing puzzles, Playdoh, coloring, etc in addition to tea parties and such. Nadia has been using  the dining room table, and she's ripped up the cloth on one of the chair's cushions. So the new rule is that we don't use the dining room table or chairs for playing. I had purchased that table and chairs to fit in the dormer window area of her room. Since that area is now pretty empty, I went shopping on Amazon today and ordered an adorable little rocking chair for her as well as a little matching rocking cradle for a doll and a matching bookshelf. While I was at it, I bought a transportation themed bookshelf for Ian's room. I can't wait until they arrive and we get them set up. I think they're going to be so cute!

I'd better head to bed. Here's to hoping for a much better night of sleep tonight now that the Claritin effects are passed and hopefully Nadia will sleep through the night. When I went into Ian's room this morning (7:00am) he was playing quietly with stuffed animals in his crib. Way to go, Ian! That's what used to be true for Nadia. Hopefully she'll get back on track in the near future. I think VBS has been part of the problem. I think she has a hard time going right to bed after we get home from that.

Renee

A couple of weeks ago I started working on teaching Nadia her Mommy and Daddy's full names (first, middle, last). She's known hers and Ian's for quite awhile. If I ask her to say Ian's full name she always immediately asks "Is he having a bad day?" after saying his name. I am sure this is in reference to Ian's middle name (Alexander) in light of the book, Alexander and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. At first when I'd ask her what is Daddy's name, she'd make his middle name Renee. I think she did that because she and I share that middle name. It cracked me up! Now she says his correct middle name (Earl). Of course now I've had to remind her a few times that she calls me Mommy (not Ruth), but it still seemed like an important bit of information for her to memorize. She also now can say the name of our street (or Lane in our case), city, state, and continent. She also can sing a song that includes the names of all 7 continents (thanks to library storytime). She can tell you what season we're in and what month it is. I'm excited about starting a more formal preschool curriculum with her in about a month or so.

I love this picture because they were both laughing their heads off . It was a sweet moment!

Lawn Mowing Take Four

Usually when I mow the lawn, I do it all at one time. It's not like we have a really big lawn (our property is about 1/2 an acre). We used a riding mower at our previous house because we had more than 2 acres of grass to mow. It takes me an average of 75 minutes to mow our lawn. If the grass has gotten really long, then it takes longer than that. Last week I only mowed for 60 minutes (while Alexis was babysitting), so I didn't mow the entire lawn. We've had a lot of rain lately, and the temperatures haven't been quite as hot. This has meant the grass has been growing far more rapidly than it did the last few weeks. Due to VBS I knew I couldn't mow the whole lawn before it would get dark if I waited until Paul was home to mow. I decided to use 15 minutes of the babysitting time this morning to mow the grass inside the fenced area. Then after feeding the kids, I took them out to play in the fenced in area and mow the part of the grass near that fenced area (meaning I'd be able to keep an eye on them). Ian was content to play, but Nadia cried at first because she wanted me to play with her. Eventually she stopped crying and also played while I mowed for about 30 minutes.

Then I brought the kids in to begin the transition to nap time. I also thought Karen would be arriving shortly, but she called and said she was running behind by about 30 minutes. So I put the kids down for their naps, put the video monitor in my pocket, and went out to mow until Karen arrived. The next opportunity I had to mow was after we got home from VBS. I'm glad the task of mowing doesn't normally have to be divided into four parts. The biggest disadvantage of doing it this way is that I had to wash my feet, legs, etc. four different times to try to decrease how much grass I was spreading through the house. At least I got some exercise today! If Ian would nap longer than 30 minutes, then I could mow while the kids napped. I think it's reasonable to assume that will be the case next year. I think I'll need to mow in the evenings (when Paul is home) for the rest of the summer. It was an extra challenge this week due to VBS.

Speaking of Ian's naps, I spoke with Ian's OT today. She was pleased with his progess in eating the shells and agrees that we need to get him chewing before we can make much more progress. There's only so far I can go with adding more texture if he's just swallowing everything. She gave me some tips for trying to teach him how to chew. Regina, do you have any tips to share along that line? Last week she gave me a strategy for brushing his teeth, and that is working beautifully. YAY!

I decided to ask her this week about how to teach him to go DOWN the stairs. I have tried for months to teach him, but he just cries or starts going back up. He has been able to climb up the steps for a long time. She said with some children she teaches them to bump, bump down on their bottoms, but she said she usually introduces that with children younger than Ian. She said at his age she'd suggest just skipping ahead to teaching him to walk down the stairs while holding the railing with his left hand and my hand with his right hand. I think that's going to work much better. I didn't let Nadia walk down the stairs until she was two years old, but I think we'll be starting Ian sooner on that. As for nap time she agreed that for now I should just have him take the first part of his nap in the crib and the second part in my arms. We'll work towards the whole nap in his crib, but she agreed the fact that he usually only cries 5 minutes before he falls asleep is definitely progress.

VBS Take Three

Nadia will be attending her third (and for 2011 final) week of VBS starting tonight. This week it's at our church. I'll be teaching the Bible story twice each night - once to the group for ages 7-9 and once for those ages 10-12. I'm actually caught up in terms of grading, which is a wonderful feeling. I don't mean I have nothing to grade, as many students submit assignments early. I mean everything that was due during the first four weeks (the fifth week began today) has been graded. This morning I also made a lot of progress in writing the syllabi and welcome letters as well as getting the two online courses set up. I'm not caught up with housework, but I did clean the oven last week (for the first time since we moved here), and I made peanut butter cookies last night and baked ziti this afternoon. At least we won't starve. :-)

Speaking of eating, I made some small shells yesterday, and it hit me that Ian might be able to swallow them as they're really tiny (and don't contain any ingredient we're supposed to avoid right now). I only put cheese on a small portion and saved the rest (plain) for Ian. I've been mixing them in his other dishes (such as applesauce or pureed sweet potatoes), and he's been swallowing them! He spit a few of them out, but he never threw up, and most of them he swallowed without incident. I felt like doing the dance of joy ( any of you remember Balki's dance on the show "Perfect Strangers"?). Now if we could just get this boy to chew for the first time in his life.