11.1 Pounds!!!

This morning Ian weighed 11lbs 1.5oz! He gained 27.5 ounces in 9 days! Wow!! We are going through many outfits a day, but he must be keeping more in than I realize as he's growing like a weed! I checked and by his birthdate he's now in the .4% for weight, which is an improvement as he was off the chart (less than 0%) 9 days ago. If he's compared by his EDD then he's at the 7% for weight. He's had another good day today in terms of napping. Last night wasn't great, but I attribute that to Paul not Ian. Paul put him to bed while I was in choir and he didn't put Ian inside the snowsuit. Ugh. I was upset when I was awakened at midnight (less than 3 hours after I had gone to bed), but when I saw Ian was wearing only a onesie and lying on top of his snowsuit, I was amazed he slept that long as the poor guy was cold. Going to choir cost me a lot of sleep last night as I went to bed 2 hours after Ian did and then because he wasn't put to bed properly I had to get up at midnight and 4am (rather than just once).

Despite my lack of sleep last night, I've been very productive today. I took the kids with me to the grocery store, did one load of laundry (including putting it away!), did one load of dishes, mowed the lawn (with Ian in the Snugli while Nadia was napping), graded papers while feeding Ian while Nadia was napping, etc. It's getting easier to get more accomplished now that I'm using the Snugli more and also now that Ian is taking 4 naps a day.




Paul is not one to give compliments on my appearance. I think the last time he gave me one was in the summer of 2008 (he liked one of the maternity outfits I wore that summer). However he has complimented me TWICE this week! WOW! That made me feel even better about my recent purchases.
As you can see Ian enjoys looking in a mirror and he enjoys his baths now. These pictures were hard to take. Most of the ones I took were blurry as they turn out better when I have both hands on the camera and  I was holding Ian with one hand.

Sleep is Good!

Last night was my last night of teaching this semester. The next night I will teach will be May 25 when the first summer session starts. I have one more night of class (Monday), but that night my students will be doing a field experience at the local public library. Next week I am giving exams on Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon, and then I'll have a 19 day break until I return to campus on the 25th. This Friday I have a 5 hour meeting in Harrisburg. I was selected by our state's Department of Education to be one of 13 members of a new committee. Thankfully this is the only time our committee will meet face-to-face. The rest of the work will be done on-line. I agreed to join the committee if I was allowed to bring Ian with me. Nadia will spend the day at Sarah's. She hasn't been to her house since January so that will be a nice treat for Nadia, and Ian is coming with me to the meeting so that I can nurse him before and after the meeting. I'll also excuse myself once during the 5 hour meeting to nurse him.

Last night Ian finally had a good night. He slept from 8:20pm to 3:15am and then from 3:45-6:15. Much better!!! I was in bed before 9pm so I got a decent amount of sleep. Nadia got up about an hour after Ian so she got about 11 hours last night, which was also good. Ian's naps are typically 30-45 minutes long. This morning his first nap was about 50 minutes long. I thought that was great, but then he ended up sleeping for 95 minutes during his second nap. WOW!! There actually was an overlap of 50 minutes between their naps. That has only happened one or two other times the past 4+ months. I almost laid down after I put Nadia down, but I assumed Ian would be waking up any moment as he had been down for 45 minutes. Had I known he would sleep another 50 minutes I definitely would have taken a nap myself. Oh well. Typically Nadia wakes up after she's been down about 90 minutes. I've learned that if I let her cry 2-3 minutes she usually goes back to sleep for another 60-90 minutes. Yesterday that didn't happen. Her nap was only 90 minutes long. Today she went back to sleep for another 75 minutes. So both kids slept well last night and had good naps today. This makes for a happy mommy!

Ian didn't gain any weight yesterday, but considering he gained 22 ounces over the previous 7 days, I am not the least bit concerned! Only a few more ounces to go and he'll be 11 pounds! I am trying to decide whether to buy him a few pair of shorts for Florida or not. He goes through so many outfits a day due to excessive spitting up that it sometimes seems easier just to leave him in only a onesie. If I buy shorts I'm not sure whether to get 0-3 month or 3-6 month. I hate to buy more 0-3 month clothes as I don't think he'll be in that size much longer, but he still has a small waist and short legs so 3-6 month shorts might be too small. He did wear a 3-6 month onesie on Monday (the one in yesterday's post that is red/white/blue).

I tried to get a video last night of Nadia catching a ball. Unfortunately the beginnning part (where Paul was throwing the ball) was cut off and then the second time the part where she caught it was cut off. I need to take a better one, but until then here's an 8 second video clip which does give you the impression she knows how to throw and catch a ball. :-)

Snowsuit in Florida?

Back when I was trying different tricks to figure out how to get Ian to sleep somewhere besides someone's arms, I learned that he doesn't like his arms to be swaddled BUT if his arms are free then his startle reflex keeps waking him up. Nadia could sleep as long as I swaddled her with her arms free. That didn't work for Ian. He would fight me as I swaddled him, but then he'd sleep better. In early March we took a trip to Maryland, and in preparation for that trip I had him sleep in his snowsuit since he'd be sleeping in that in the car as we drove down. It proved to work out perfectly as he could still move his arms if he wanted to, but the weight of the suit kept his arms from jerking due to the startle reflex. The problem has been that with the weather getting warmer, he's sweating a lot when he's in the snowsuit. A few weeks ago I tried to have him sleep without it, and the results were disastrous. Unfortunately I forgot about that experience and last night put him in bed with a onesie, sleeper, and sleep sack on. I put him down at 7:45, and I was NOT happy when he woke up at 11:30, and I was even more displeased when I found out Paul had to settle him down at 8:30pm! I nursed him a little until he fell asleep and put him back in bed. When he started crying, I decided to let him CIO. Paul set up the pack 'n play, and I put him in it on his back (instead of in the Nap Nanny as I thought if he was going to be crying we might as well work on that transition as well). After one hour of crying I nursed him, put him in his snowsuit, and he slept for 4 hours in his Nap Nanny. He slept about 7.5 hours total last night. I felt badly when I realized that not putting him in the snowsuit was the problem. However he's getting really sweaty with that on!! For his second nap today I had him in a onesie plus snowsuit which was better, but he still got a bit sweaty. I really don't want to use the snowsuit in Florida next month or in PA in the summer! One of my sisters suggested putting a sweater or jacket on him instead and gradually easing up on the layers. Hopefully that will work. He's also still congested (runny nose) so maybe that's the problem. All I know is that I really, really, really hope he starts sleeping better at night. I like it much better when he only wakes up once to nurse (around 3 or 4am) during the night. It wasn't that he was hungry as he had only 1 ounce from a bottle last night and didn't nurse too much. Hopefully I can find a way to ease him out of the snowsuit without the both of us losing so much sleep. Tonight I am going to have him in just a diaper inside the snowsuit.

The good news is that he is still gaining weight at a rapid pace. In exactly one week he gained almost 1.5 lbs (22 ounces!). I had hoped gaining weight would help with his sleeping not make it worse! His general mood has greatly improved with his weight gain. The poor guy was fussy because he was hungry. I am trying not to put myself on a huge guilt trip over that. I don't have to hold him all the time any more. Not that I don't love holding him, but I like holding and playing with Nadia also!

Dinosaur Train

After Nadia woke up from her almost 3 hour nap yesterday, seven of us headed to Reptiland since it was Member Day for the PBS station I recently joined. Nadia and Ian didn't need handstamps, and our membership allowed us to have 6 free admissions so Paul's parents and Shawn joined us. Nadia showed some interest in some of the snakes and other animals, but mostly she was interested in the other children and walking all over the place. Her highlight was definitely seeing Buddy from Dinosaur Train twice. She called him "asaur" and said "he is big." She wasn't very interested in the rainforest show which included an owl, large snake, etc. Maybe next year she'll be old enough to enjoy the show. We then went to Applebee's. It was the first time since January that we had been out to a sit down restaurant with both kids. Nadia amused herself by dipping a french fry in ketchup, licking the ketchup off, and then repeating steps one and two many, many times. Next Sunday they're having another Member Day at Reptiland and the day before Mother's Day (in about 2 weeks) we'll be going to an amusement park. I think she's old enough to enjoy kiddie rides!! Hopefully the weather will be nice that day. She'll get to meet Clifford!

I know my list that I posted on Saturday of Nadia's vocabulary is definitely not complete. For example yesterday in the car we heard her say, "bless you, Ian" after Ian sneezed. The last time I plan to post such a list is on June 24. I know it won't be complete, but I still think it will be fun in the future to look back and see what were at least some of the words she was saying when she turned two.

Ian is up to 10lb 8.5oz this morning! This means he gained 18.5 ounces in 6 days - more than a pound! Considering from 2 months to 4 months old he gained only two pounds, it's pretty amazing that in less than a week he gained more than he gained over the previous month! Now if we could just get him to go back to waking up only once and sleeping closer to 10 hours total. The last two nights he's slept 5.5 hours the first stretch and 2.5 hours the second. My day has begun at 4:50am yesterday and today, and that's too early especially when I'm also feeding him for an hour starting around 1:00am.

Way to grow, Ian!!!

The shield is history! Ian hasn't used one for over 48 hours, and I have no intention of using them again. Although it was hard emotionally to start supplementing more, it was definitely the right thing to do. In five days he gained FOURTEEN ounces! Yes, my boy weighed 10lb 4oz this morning with only a dry diaper on! WOW!!! He's spitting up even more, but enough must be staying inside him. Now if we could just get him to sleep at least 8 hours straight at night again. I don't like getting up at 11pm or 1am.

22 Months Old

Twenty-two of my favorite things she says; I either find these to be humorous, endearing, or both.

1. hug you
2. help you
3. hold you (in each of these three instances she means "me" not "you")
4. see ya (her favorite thing to say this week)
5. booboo kiss it (which I do until she says "all better")
6. Nadia cook Mommy (she needs to learn the word "for" LOL)
7. again (when she says it after prayer time - she wants me to pray again and again and again before bed)
8. tickle (when she's asking me to tickle her)
9. please
10. thank you

11. (you're) welcome
12. chocolate (since she shares a love of it, but I also find it amusing that she calls her sidewalk chalk "chocolate." Even though she only had chocolate milk once, she periodically asks me for chocolate milk when I give her a sippy cup of milk)
13. level (Paul tries to teach her some really difficult words. Once when he was pushing her on the swing I overheard him trying to teach her potential and kinetic energy. He has actually succeeded at teaching her the word level. She says it when she's trying to carry a plate or tray without the items falling off of it.)
14. coupon (I didn't expect this one!)
15. receipt (I didn't expect this one either!)
16. Nadia (when she uses her name to mean "let me do it")
17. I share (means "share with me")
18. over (she says this when she sees credits at the end of a tv show - she figured out on her own that this signals the end of a DVD or tv show)
19. oh no! (such as before she knocks over a tower of blocks)
20. nose (this is very helpful as it's her way of letting me know when I need to wipe her nose with a tissue)
21. good girl (when she announces this after obeying an instruction I've just given her)
22. hey mom (I knew she'd switch from Mommy to Mom at some point, but I didn't predict that to happen at  21 months old, LOL)

Over three hundred of the words in her expressive vocabulary:

Nature related: dog, cat, mice, turtle, owl, cow, tiger, penguin, barn, horse, goat, pig, bunny, frog, star, moon, monkey, flower, knee, elbow, eye, belly, toes, hand, lap, bear, chicken, nose, grass, snow, fish, parrot, ladybug, bee, earth, duck, seal, ear, hair, mouse, teeth, alligator, sheep, polar bear, butterfly, elephant, dirt, leaves, thumb, mulch, rock, buffalo, dragon, stick

Proper nouns: Mommy, Daddy, Ian, PopPop, Grandma, Abby, Grandpa, Lane, Bob, Larry, (Mr.) Lunt, Elmo, Nadia, Junior (Asparagus), Gabby, Sarah, (Madame) Blueberry, (Mr.) Jiggle, Shawn, Laura, George, Clifford, Jericho, Tylenol, Alexis, Brandi, Susie, Jesus

Food related: spoon, lunch, dinner, bagel, hotdog, ice cream, milk, cookie, (Capt.) Crunch, oatmeal, banana, yogurt, cheese, water, pretzel, bottle, apple, pizza, chocolate, cracker, bite, hungry, grapes, raisin, more, done, napkin, jelly, peas, egg, bib, tomato, hamburger, pickle, kitchen, Kix, mess, ice, noodle, (Golden) Grahams, pears, carrot, counter, mug, fries, ketchup, juice, (English) muffin, soup, cereal, chip, fork, lollipop
Verbs and Adverbs: rip, push, tickle, pop, watch, sweep, hug, back, flip, poop, pee, rock, go, open, color, swing, read, play, eat, thank, share, watch, running, see, kiss, digging, bowling, want, dance, don't, again, make, coming, drink, bite, sure (as in "yes")

Adjectives: blue, yucky, big, wet, good, all, clean, hot, this, that, yummy, stuck, pink, two, three, the, silly, green, purple, yellow, four, blue, cold, one, four, five. six, seven, eight, nine, ten, funny, bad, tired, Mommy's, Nadia's, level, (you're) welcome, over (as in "finished")

Common nouns: book, puzzle, button, upstairs, cd, remote, tv, diaper, ball, blanket, girl, airplane, crayon, hat, shoes, sock, house, wall, tissue, balloon, jeans, church, brush, baby, light, basketball, touchdown, oval, bath, computer, phone, doctor, pump, sticker, car, boat, gym, pieces, princess, bed, there, stairs, boy, song, engine, slide, picture, belt, beads, purse, morning, bag, receipt, piano, dress, pants, bubble, sink, jacket, stethoscope, shovel, shirt, pants, dress, kite, keys, (sand)box, booboo, magazine, coupon, chair, nap

Prepositions: up, down, off, on, out, under, in

Pronouns: I, me, you, it

Miscellaneous: uh oh, oops, hi, hello, bye bye, please, night night, yes, no, ah choo, yeah, okay, peekaboo

Dinner Date!

Last night Paul and I went out to dinner. It was our second dinner date over the past 8+ months. The last one was in February for Valentine's Day. At first I was planning on going to Olive Garden as it's one of my most favorite restaurants and I had a $4 coupon (from Paul's parents' newspaper), but I was looking online to see if any of the restaurants were having specials, and TGIF caught my attention. They have quite a few options of 3 course meals that are $12.99 (or $16.99 if you're getting something like steak or shrimp). My chicken dish was so large that I  brought half of the chicken home as well as all of the angel hair pasta that came with it. I was pleasantly surprised when the waitress brought us two breadsticks prior to our appetizer. That's one of the reasons I love Olive Garden so I was happy that I still got to eat one breadstick with my dinner. My favorite part was the peanut butter pie. They just gave a small portion, but it was the perfect size and was extremely delicious!!!! After dinner we went to Lowe's to exchange what we thought were two ceiling light fixtures for Ian and Nadia's bedrooms that were actually light kits to attach to ceiling fans. OOPS! Thankfully they didn't give us any problem with making the return even though we bought them almost 8 months ago. Our last stop was at Walmart where we bought a flotation device for Nadia to use in Florida, a casserole dish for me, sand toys for Nadia, and a bicycle pump for Paul (our wheelbarrow tire is flat). Aside from the time when Paul called his mom on the phone, it was great to have almost 3 hours of conversation with my hubby.

I was thinking we need to do this more often until I found out Ian only drank 2 ounces while we were gone, and he cried most of the time. He was happy and smiling when we got home. I nursed him a little and gave him one more ounce by bottle, but by that time he was very tired. I put him down at 8:25 and unfortunately he woke up at 11pm, 2:45am, and 5:25am. The longest stretch was only 3 hours. It was the worst night in a long time. I also don't think they fed Nadia anything last night after we left and she had only had a slice of cheese before we left. She made up for it this morning. Between 7:30-10:00am she ate 2 packets of oatmeal, 90% of a yogurt, many raisins, an entire banana, and a packet of fruit gushers. That's WAY more than she usually eats for breakfast. My girl was hungry! I hope they are able to get Ian to consume more milk today. I'm doing two peer observations (12pm and 1pm) and have a faculty meeting at 2pm. Including driving time I'll be gone about 4.5 hours. I really hope tonight is a better night as I am pooped. My fever is worse today than it was yesterday. I am hoping I feel better by Monday as that's when I rescheduled the play date with Evie and her daugher Desi.

The good news is that Ian is doing a great job with being weaned off the shield. No tears! He actually seems to prefer nursing without the shield. Yay! Also I weighed him this morning and with nothing but a dry diaper on he weighed 9lb 10.5oz. Yahoo!!! At the doctor's office he had a wet diaper on. I weighed the wet diaper that I took off right before I weighed him with a dry diaper, and it weighed 3 ounces. So my guess is that he weighed about 9lb 6oz on Tuesday if he had been weighed with a dry (vs. wet) diaper since he weighed 9lb 8oz at the doctor's office with a wet diaper. So I think he gained 4.5 ounces the past 3 days! He has been spitting up a LOT as he spits up more when he's congested (which he is) and when he gets more by bottle, but even with all this spitting up he's gaining weight at a faster pace. I am praying he'll hit 10 lbs by May 1. I think the length measurement was wrong. The outfit he's wearing today used to come to his ankles and now it only comes to his knees. Tomorrow I am going to put a 3-6 month outfit on him to see how that fits. Also his 0-3 month pants no longer fall off of him. Most of his 0-3 month clothing still fits, but maybe he's at least outgrowing a few of them. We looked for swim trunks for Ian at Walmart yesterday, but the smallest size they had was 12month which would never work! One last bit of good news regarding Ian is that he rolled over yesterday (belly to back). YAHOO! I also have been giving him toys to hold, and he does hold them. My answers to the questions the nurse asked would be different if his appointment was today. I have been doing really short periods of tummy time a few times a day the last few days. He also laughed during his bath on Wednesday. What a change! His naps weren't very long yesterday, but he did take 3 short naps in his crib. His first nap this morning was about one hour long. Much better.

Eau de Ian

Some moms sleep with their child's blanket so that the child will be comforted with their mom's smell. I've even seen pictures of a child sleeping with her mom's shirt for the same reason. I would like to do the same but in reverse. I want to be able to hold something up to my nose that has Ian's head smell on it. I am not sure if it is a difference between boys and girls or if I just wasn't as observant with Nadia, but I've been keenly aware of Ian's unique head smell whereas I don't recall noticing Nadia's. I am 100% positive that if you blindfolded me and put my arms behind my back that just by using my nose I could identify Ian if you had me smell the heads of several babies. With Nadia I remember enjoying smelling her head after I'd given her a bath. I love the smell of baby bath and baby shampoo, but this is different. This is Ian's smell. Is this strange that I find his head smell so distinct and didn't notice it with Nadia? When is this going to disappear? I have enjoyed it the last few months and when I go to bed I can still smell it on my clothes. I'm sure it won't last forever which is why I wish I could bottle it up so that I could have a walk down memory lane in the future and smell this precious smell again. We can take pictures to capture visual memories or take videos to capture auditory and visual ones. They need to come up with a way to capture olfactory ones that are more permanent as the smell that is transferred to an article of clothing or a blanket doesn't last very long.

I knew I felt lousy yesterday, and that was confirmed when I took my temp and it was over 100 degrees. Why is it that a temperature makes the fact that we feel sick seem more legitimate? Ian also had a fever, but I resisted in giving him Tylenol in light of the recent studies saying it's best not to give Tylenol after an immunization. I just gave him lots of Mommy love, and that was enough for him. Nadia's nose is really sore from it being wiped so many times the last several days. Ian's nose has been running since Monday so we're going through a lot of Kleenex in this house. Paul has been the only one to escape this bug. For me the chief complaints have been headache (behind my eyes), fever, and sore throat. I think the runny nose is just allergies in my case. It really hurts when I swallow. A nice at least 8 hour stretch of sleep would have really been appreciated, but it hasn't happened the last few nights. Last night I was up with Ian from 2:20-3:25 and then again at 4:55am. Since I put him to bed early (7:30pm) he did sleep a little more than 8 hours total, which was an improvement although definitely not his best night. Thankfully I went to bed at 7:45 last night. I had zero temptation to go to choir rehearsal with such a sore throat.
Even though we weren't feeling well, we couldn't stay inside on such a pretty day. It got up into the low 70's yesterday. We took a walk, spent time in the backyard, went to the playground that is 1/2 mile from our house, and also went to the hardware and pizza stores.

38

Today is my 38th birthday. What a difference compared to my 35th birthday. That was my worst one because at that point we had tried to conceive for 5 years and tried to adopt for 2.5 years within the US and 4 months from Ukraine. We knew our time with Lifetime (domestic adoption) was coming to a close and also were having our doubts that our documents (which had made it to Ukraine and been translated) would be submitted before they expired. At that point in my life I had very little hope I'd ever become a mom. Just three years later I have two beautiful children. Thank you, Lord! There are times I feel a little "odd" due to my age compared to the age of my kids, but I no longer feel the sense of despair regarding an upcoming birthday like I did when I was childless. The fact that I'm on the older side for having a toddler and an infant was reinforced at the Mom's Night Out last week. One mom was talking about how she was so old and others were commenting on how much younger they were compared to her. So I asked her how old she was (she has 4 kids of whom the youngest is 21 months old). She told me 33. Umm I don't think 33 is old. A doctor put "elderly multigravida" on my medical record when I was 35 so I guess I've been elderly for 3 years now? LOL! No, I am not elderly!!!

It would have been nice if Ian had given me a gift of a nice night of sleep for my birthday. Maybe he will do so tonight, but last night he slept from 8:10-2:15 and 3:55-5:30 (less than 8 hours). I didn't get to bed until 9:10 due to putting Nadia to bed, pumping, etc. I nursed Ian for an hour+ and then Paul took over at 3:25am with a bottle of EBM, which I greatly appreciated. I invited a friend from MOPS over today with her daughter who just turned 1 a week ago. I thought some adult conversation would be a nice treat on my birthday, but I'll be postponing those plans as last night my throat started hurting (along with a headache, etc.). It hasn't gone away, and I don't want to spread my germs. I'll have to record Nadia singing happy birthday to me. That will be a special treat! Nadia took another 3 hour nap yesterday but then only slept 10 hours last night. Paul and I were planning to go out to dinner tomorrow night. I am not sure if we will because yesterday our neighbor found out her mom is dying. I left a message last night asking her if she wanted me to find someone else to watch the kids while I'm at work on Friday and that we could reschedule our date. I felt badly as yesterday was Beth's birthday. It certainly wasn't a happy one for her. I think she's about 3 years older than me (and her youngest is in the 6th grade which again shows I'm a bit old for the age of my kids). I could tell when Gabby and Alexis came over yesterday that they had both been crying. I felt badly for them. I am grateful that neither Paul or I have had to experience the loss of a parent. I hope that Nadia and Ian get to spend time for many more years with their four grandparents.

More Calories

Although I wanted Ian to go down earlier last night, he actually ended up going down later (8:55pm). His first stretch was a little over 6 hours. I nursed him for 75 minutes and then he slept almost 2 hours. He got about 8 hours of sleep total, which isn't enough, but at least my day didn't start as early as it did the last two mornings. Nadia slept about 11 hours last night for the first time in a few days. I think Ian would have taken a great nap this morning if we had been home as he fell asleep in the car on the way to the doctor's office and fell back asleep almost immediately after I transferred him into the Snugli in the parking lot. He was awakened several times - first when the nurse weighed/measured him, second when the doctor examined him, and third when the nurse came in to give him his shots, but in between each of those activities he slept in my arms. He also slept in the car on the way from the doctor's office to the grocery store, while we were in the grocery store, and on the way home. He woke up and wanted to be fed (understandbly so!) once we got home. I have been working a bit on putting him in the Nap Nanny awake, and he has succeeded a few times at putting himself to sleep. I am hoping he can master that skill without needing to let him cry.

I was impressed by how little he cried during/after his shots. I think the pacifier helped. Nadia never liked a pacifier. He screamed for only a few seconds and then just sucked like crazy on his pacifier. I knew not to look at his face. I did that with Nadia's shots once and the look she gave me hurt my heart so much I knew I would never look in a child's eyes when he/she got a shot again. To be honest I wish I could delegate the job of taking a child to the doctor for his/her shots to my hubby, but I know that is impossible.

I wasn't able to answer "yes" to all the questions they asked me such as does he hold a toy in his hands (no), roll over (no), squeal (no), put his hands together (no), etc. He did flash the doctor one of his gorgeous smiles when the doctor was using the stethoscope on him. That surprised me as Nadia always cries when they do that (even at her last appointment). He didn't like his ears being examined though. The doctor said I need to give him more time on his belly to strengthen his shoulder muscles, etc. Ian hates tummy time, but I've got to start doing it every day.

The doctor wasn't happy with his height or weight. With a wet diaper on he weighed 9lb 8oz. At his 4 months appointment he weighed 7lb 3oz without any diaper. The doctor said that his head circumference is going in the right direction (catching up). However he didn't even stay on the same curve with his weight and length. In both cases he dropped farther down than he was 2 months ago. I don't put a lot of stock in the accuracy of the length measurements, but supposedly he is 22.75 inches long. They don't give specific percentiles but they said less than 5th % for weight and height and 25th for head circumference. I looked it up online and he went from the .3% for weight last time to not even on the chart this time. In comparison Nadia was up to the 21% at her 4 month appt. For length he went from 9.5% last time to .9% this time (Nadia jumped up to 35% by her 4 month appt). I also looked on a chart online that compares weight to length, and he's at the .5% for that. His head circumference is up to 16.6% according to the chart online. The doctor said 25%, but I think they were rounding. The doctor said he expected to see the other numbers start to catch up as the head circumference did. I said I did call at 3 months and was told that gaining 1/2 ounce a day was fine. He said well they prefer it to be 1 ounce and at the very minimum for Ian to stay at the same percentile (rather than dropping lower). He said Ian needs to be given more formula to supplement after I nurse him. He said that if I agree to increasing his calories and will monitor his weight at home that he won't require a weight check. I am to call though if he doesn't start gaining weight faster. Just to stay on the same curve he needs to gain at least 3 lbs in the next 2 months. The doctor said he'd be thrilled if Ian gained 4-5 pounds in the next 2 months but that at the very least he needs to gain 2.5 to 3 lbs.

I felt like bursting into tears, but I didn't. I want my son to gain weight so I will definitely start supplementing more. After I nursed him I gave him a bottle of 2 ounces that I pumped at school yesterday. I have a feeling that nursing is going to end sooner than I want it to. I am praying that he'll still want to nurse until at least 6 months. I've switched my goal from 12 months to 6 months as bottles are so much easier and I have a feeling he'll prefer those and gradually refuse to nurse. All I can say is that I have certainly tried my best to nurse my son for as long as possible. I hope once I get to school this evening I can forget about this as I don't want to start crying there. I scheduled Ian and Nadia's appointments (6 month for Ian and 2 year for Nadia) for June 24th. Hopefully Ian will weigh over 12 lbs by that point. He'll be seeing a urologist earlier that week to find out if he needs surgery or not.

On the way to the doctor's office I stopped at the bank. At first I wondered why Nadia kept saying things like "fries" and "good girl" and "happy," and then I figured out that she though the bank drive-thru was a McDonald's drive-thru, LOL! I tried to explain to her that they only gave me money, not food. In the exam room she was amusing herself with the contents of my purse. She had fun playing with my keys. She kept taking the keys, walking toward the door and saying "bye bye see ya" and then blowing me kisses. It was so funny! She also took a diaper out of my purse, laid down on the floor, and tried to put the diaper on. She's definitely into dramatic play. :-)

Feeling Blue

As a mom it seems at times as if your children need 100% of your time and energy. Of course that is impossible as moms are human beings not robots. We have our own needs. The list of needs gets whittled down as small as possible. Some days that list has been as small as going to the bathroom and getting four hours of sleep while they slept. While the children are awake, aside from going to the bathroom (which generally entails bringing one of them with me because it isn't safe to leave the two of them together without an adult present) the main need I usually succeed in meeting is to eat. I have to say though there have been a few days when I didn't even eat lunch, and if you know me in person, you know I rarely skip a meal due to blood sugar issues. I knew that the dentist visit wasn't going to be good last week because I've been rushing to nurse Ian in the morning and so there have been many days when my teeth have only been brushed once. When the hygienist said something last Monday, I replied that life had been really hectic the past 4 months and I barely have time to get a shower or brush my teeth these days. She said I need to build Mommy time in to my schedule that must include brushing twice a day and flossing once a day. Since that appointment I've at least been trying to get back in the habit of brushing at least twice a day. I know I need to start flossing, but to do so is going to mean less sleep as I'd need to do that before going to bed. When the kids are in bed the need that usually trumps all others is sleep. The person who suffers the most for that decision of mine is my hubby. We really haven't had much time together the past four months since I generally hit the hay within 15 minutes of putting the kids in bed, and part of that time is brushing my teeth, washing my face, putting on my pjs, etc. Well to be honest there have been many days I haven't even bothered to change clothes and have just gone to bed in whatever I've been wearing that day.

I figured I wouldn't have time for a shower yesterday morning so I took one on Saturday morning after I finished mowing the lawn. I did hope to wear some makeup yesterday, but I didn't have time even though I was up for 3.5 hours before we left for church. I've planned to wear makeup 3 times this year (Sears pictures, Easter, and Ian's dedication), but I only succeeded once (Sears pictures). Since I didn't get a shower yesterday I had to have one today. Ian's first stretch was 5 minutes shy of 8 hours but then I couldn't get him to go back to sleep. He was up from 4:15am until 12:30pm! I tried MANY times to get him to take a nap during that time span, but it never happened. So at 8:45 I put him in his crib and let him cry (scream) while I took a shower. What choice did I have? I felt badly, but I need to get a shower at least every other day especially when I am going to work that day.

I had hoped to have a little "Mommy time" on Saturday. The plan had been that I would borrow Paul's mom's car and spend maybe an hour at the mall near their house while Paul was at the party and while they watched the kids. I kept changing my mind as to how I was going to spend that hour. I was torn between either getting a manicure or doing some shopping for myself. Some women just love to shop. I am not one of them, but I do enjoy going shopping now and then and aside from maternity clothes I haven't shopped at a mall for clothes or shoes for myself the past 2 years. I was hoping to buy myself a new pair of earrings and a new pair of shoes. Nothing extravagent but those little things can be special treats to probably most women. In fact the pair of shoes I wanted to replace I have owned since high school. Yes, I've worn this pair of shoes for over 20 years. Considering I haven't bought any new shoes in 2 years I think I'm overdue. Since Nadia wasn't feeling well, I just couldn't leave her. Sick children need to cuddle with their mothers! I think a sick child's needs almost always trump yours. I really, really, really, really wanted Nadia to be at Ian's dedication yesterday. That was just MY desire though not what was best for her. Even though I know I did the right thing to let her stay home with my mom, I still am having some regrets over that decision since well her brother's dedication is a once in a lifetime event. Of course she would have been oblivious and she had a lovely time with my mom and got to take a 3+ hour nap so she was better off staying home. In some ideal world though my mom and Nadia would have been present for Ian's dedication.

I think that I need to schedule one date a month with Paul. We've gone on one date the past 4 months, and that's not enough. We are scheduled to go out this Thursday and ironically I am tempted to postpone those plans. I feel like it's the wrong week to go out because the kids are with babysitters too much this week. Paul didn't get much schoolwork done this weekend so he asked me to ask Beth to babysit both Monday and Tuesday whereas he usually does one of those, and she already was coming on Friday because this is the one Friday afternoon a month I go to work. Usually they kids are with a babysitter only one day a week. If I go out to dinner with him on Thursday night then they'll be with a babysitter four days this week. I also think once a month I am going to ask if Paul will watch the kids for an hour or two on Saturday so I can do something like get a haircut or a manicure or go shopping for a new pair of earrings. I usually get my haircut every two months, but I've been able to go longer this time since it was cut SO short in January.
The last two days have been rough ones emotionally. In addition to struggling with feeling like I never get 5 minutes to myself, I have been feeling rejected. It's been years since I got a rejection from a conference proposal. I've gotten plenty regarding publications. It usually has taken multiple submissions for my manuscripts to be accepted, but I've had almost every single conference proposal accepted. Only one other time did I get a conference rejection, and I've sent many conference proposals the past 7 years as most years I've spoken at 2-3 conferences and often done more than one session at each conference. I only applied for one conference for next school year. I sent in two proposals "just to be safe." Both were rejected. I got the emails today. Since I already have tenure and promotion and am not trying to work towards full professor, it's not really a big deal, but it still stung a bit emotionally.

The bigger rejection was last night when Ian refused to nurse. It was like deja vu from Nadia. It hurt a lot. I thought maybe I didn't have any milk, but I had a lot of clogged ducts by the time he woke up so I don't think that was the case as my body had adjusted to him sleeping 8 hours. He didn't have any formula prior to 1pm yesterday but from that point until he went to bed at 8:20 he had 10 ounces. He's never had that much on a day I was with him the whole day. It really bothered me. I need to stop caring how much formula he has in a day. I want him to gain weight. He goes to the doctor's tomorrow. I'm sure he'll be over 9lbs so at least he gained 2 lbs over the past 2 months. I am hoping to nurse him 12 months, but at this point I think it will be a success if we go a full 6 months. I hope we make it that far. He didn't reject me today. Whew...

Ian's Dedication

Yesterday Paul had a graduation party to attend, and Paul's parents house was on the way; so the kids and I went with him, and he dropped us off at their house. Nadia had been sneezing and had a runny nose lately, but I thought it was just allergies. Well on the way to their house she threw up ALL over the place. Once we got there we threw her clothes in the washer and she wore one of her Grandma's white turtlenecks as her "dress." I thought she looked like she was wearing an angel costume. We also discovered she had a fever. I would have stayed home had I known she was sick! We weren't able to give her Tylenol until we got home about 5 hours later. My parents arrived last night shortly after we got the kids to bed. We put Nadia down at 8:05pm, and she slept until 5:20. It was the first time she got up before 6am since DST began several weeks ago. We kept her in our bed until Ian woke up at 5:40. He didn't get as much sleep as he did on Friday night as on Saturday night we put him down at 8:20 (so he went to bed later and got up earlier). I toyed with the idea of still taking Nadia to church with us today since she was feeling somewhat better, but she still had a fever so my mom stayed home with her. Had she been feeling well, she would have come up with Paul, Ian, and I to stand with us during his dedication. It was definitely a big disappointment for me that she had to stay home plus it meant my mom couldn't be there as she stayed at our house with Nadia. Paul's mom also wasn't able to come as her knee was really bothering her. We're hoping that both Nadia and Paul's mom will be feeling better soon!

I am very grateful though for those who were able to be with us at church this morning and more importantly I am thankful to the Lord for giving us this precious little boy. A few tears fell down my cheeks during the dedication as I was thinking of all the years I watched baby dedications and wondered if I'd ever be participating in such a ceremony with my own child, and now the Lord has enabled that to happen twice. It is not something I take for granted!! I found myself in quite an emotional mood throughout the day. I was concerned if Ian's little suit would fit him. I had splurged on this one- paid more for it by far than any outfit I've ever bought Ian or Nadia (even though I did get it on eBay). I had saved it for his dedication and then got all teary thinking he looked so cute and won't  be able to wear it much since it won't fit him next fall or winter (it's size 0-3 month). It struck me that this was probably the first time I had one of those "they grow up too fast" moments in relation to Ian. I think it hasn't happened sooner since I've been so concerned about his growth that I've always been wanting him to get bigger.

We got some good pics. YAY! I would have liked to get some with Ian and Nadia together and also with the four of us as a family, but I didn't remember until everyone had left. I guess I need to learn how to use a tripod! The last two pics at the bottom of this post were from Nadia's dedication. Hers took place 4 days after she turned 3 months old (9-28-08) and Ian's took place 6 days after he turned 4 months old (4-18-10). Even though she was a month younger, she weighed 2 lbs more at her dedication than Ian did at his, but as Paul reminded me tonight, he's healthy and that's what is most important! He goes to the doctor on Tuesday for his 4 month shots.

I should explain that this chick, which was in Nadia's Easter basket from her Grandma, is Ian's favorite toy. He loves to hear the sound it makes and feel how soft it is.

I figure since Nadia has claimed all of his toys, it's only fair that I've claimed one of hers for him. :-)

Mowing with Ian

Yesterday morning I took the kids grocery shopping. I am getting more confident in using the Snugli for Ian. It feels nice not to feel like I need to stay home whenever I'm alone with the kids. He stayed awake during the first part of the shopping trip.
Yesterday I tried to start the lawn mower while both kids were napping. I had trouble starting the lawn mower as usual, but then I called Paul and he talked me through it and I had success. It felt like such a big accomplishment! Unfortunately Ian took a super short nap and so I put him in the Snugli as I figured he needed to sleep more. I started the mower a second time! If I had put enough gas in it, I could have mowed the whole lawn as Nadia took a LONG nap. I got about half of it mowed when it ran out of gas, and the task of putting gas in the mower woke Ian up. I hope to finish it this morning. I am very psyched to know that I can now start the mower and that if I put enough gas in it I should be able to mow the whole lawn with Ian in the Snugli while Nadia is napping in her crib. I put headphones into the baby monitor and had earbuds in my ears and the monitor hooked to my waistband while I mowed with Ian in the Snugli. What a sight that must have been, LOL!

Last night was a GREAT night for Ian. He slept in his crib from 7:25pm until 4:15am and then again from 4:55-6:45am. WOW! That's the first time he's slept more than 10 hours total. Nadia didn't have a great night. We gave her Tylenol at 2:55 and she slept with me until 3:25.  That seemed to do the trick as then she slept another 4 hours without crying. Maybe she's teething? She hasn't gotten her bottom canines or any of her 2 year molars yet.

Many blessings....

1. The weather was simply gorgeous yesterday, and it's supposed to be nice again today. I am amazed at how tan I am considering it's only the middle of April!

2. I spent a lot of time outside with Nadia and Ian yesterday and plan to do the same today. Yesterday she enjoyed playing in her sandbox for the first time, and we also made a trip to the playground. She remembered that the last time she went there was with PopPop so she kept asking for Grandma and PopPop.

3. Ian took two good naps in his crib yesterday. His first was 40 minutes long, and the second was 75 minutes long! His third nap was in the Snugli at the playground, and his fourth nap was in my arms on the patio while Nadia was in the sandbox.

4. Ian has had two nights in a row where his first stretch was 8.5 hours long! Last night Paul put him down at 8:15. I got to bed by 9:15 after pumping 2 ounces. I am going to have him start sleeping in his room at night so that he can be put to bed earlier than Nadia. Last night he didn't have a second stretch which means my day started at 4:45am. My plan is to try to put him down at 7pm in the hopes that the total number of hours he sleeps at night will increase. I also am going to go to bed earlier tonight. I have been out the last 5 nights, but aside from grocery shopping I don't have any plans to go anywhere today.

5. My new camera definitely takes pictures faster than my old camera. Also, it turns out they were right about getting an extra battery for this camera. It doesn't last long! I so enjoy looking at pics of our two precious kiddos. The pic I took on Wednesday night before leaving for choir cracks me up (see the first pic in yesterday's post). The baby is the only one looking at me and smiling, and you think he would be the hardest not the easiest one to get to cooperate, LOL! Paul said he didn't because Nadia wasn't.

6. It was fun to have a pampering night last night. The chair massage was my favorite part. My skin does feel really great this morning from the facial. I contemplated whether I should buy some stuff so I could do this more often, but then I remembered that it's a struggle just to brush my teeth twice a day lately. I wanted to wear makeup on Easter, but it didn't happen. I've worn make-up once thus far in 2010 - the day we had our pictures taken at Sears in February. If I had stayed longer I could have had my toenails or fingernails painted, but I knew sleep was more important so I left the party at 8:05pm.

7. Nine family members are planning to come and join us for Ian's special day on Sunday - Paul's parents, Paul's grandmother, my parents, and Paul's brother's family. I need to decide what I'm going to serve for lunch that day as I need to do the grocery shopping today. My parents can't stay for lunch so there will be 10 eating lunch at our house (plus Ian who will dine on milk). I'm hoping to get some good pics of Ian with various family members. :-)

8. All four of us have been very healthy (aside from my runny nose and sneezing due to allergies).

9. Nadia's laughter, hugs, and kisses as well as Ian and Nadia's smiles bring such joy to my life every day.

10. Our neighbors have been so helpful. On Monday Beth left something she had cooked (zucchini with tomato sauce and cheese). They always clean up the toys and sometimes even put dishes in the dishwasher for me. On Wednesday the girls came over for 10 minutes so I could go pick up some pizza. Oh that errand was so much easier to do without two kids! Gabby and Alexis are in middle school. Alexis had fun giving Nadia a new hairdo on Monday. It's quite wonderful having two eager babysitters live close by!