Home Sweet Home!

Well Monday night was a really rough night. First of all the night nurse (the nurses work 12 hour shifts 7-7 so she had 2 nurses a day) was really chatty. I tried to go to bed at 8pm but she kept coming in and chatting about all sorts of topics - SIDS, Shaken Baby Syndrome, etc. all throughout the night (even 2 am and such!). Second, Nadia had the sleep study test during the night in which she had to stay in the car seat for 2 hours and unfortunately she woke up about 1/2 way through the test and was crying. My mom, bless her heart, got on the floor and held a pacifier in Nadia's mouth for 45 minutes during the middle of the night so I could get a little sleep. Then Nadia was weighed and she had lost 55 grams. I cried a lot over this news as the nurse said that this meant we probably wouldn't be discharged. The doctors were upset the day before when she lost 5 grams; so I know they'd be very upset over 55 grams. She was down to 5 lbs. 12 oz which meant she lost 6 ounces since birth. Then in the early morning we got her bilirubin count back and that had gone up (from 9 something to 11 something). I lost it. I called Paul and asked him to come in. I wanted to go home SOOO badly and felt it was now not going to happen.

At 9am Paul and I went to see a midwife to have my staples removed. I think the nurse and midwife were questionning my emotional stability as I just couldn't stop crying. Well my mood dramatically shifted when we got back to the room as we had missed the doctors doing their rounds while I was at my appointment and they had decided Nadia could be discharged! What "saved the day" was a poopy diaper. The doctors thought she hadn't had one in a 24 hours which wasn't true. My mom showed them the chart I had been keeping to record her wet and dirty diapers as well as how long and when I nursed. When doing the rounds usually the doctors didn't actually look at Nadia, but this time the head doctor came in and checked her diaper and PTL she had a messy diaper right at that moment so he said she can go home. PTL!!! I burst into tears again when my mom told us the news, but this time they were tears of joy. I felt like a burden had been lifted off of my shoulders. I have such respect for the families whose babies spend weeks and months in NICU. I think it's a very stressful experience. I had spent 8 nights at the hospital in 4 different rooms, and I was so very glad to be going HOME. The two conditions set for her discharge were that we would take her to see her pediatrician on Wednesday morning for a weight and bilirubin check and that I would give her formula by bottle after nursing her. I of course agreed. I would have agreed to just about anything if it meant we could go home.

On the way to the car in the early afternoon, I stopped at the RE's office to introduce the nurses, RE, etc. to Nadia. They were thrilled! They called out the embryologist, doctor, nurses, etc and all were so happy to see her. Dr. A gave her a kiss. It turns out his youngest granddaughter is also named Nadia. Paul was having the car seat inspection while I was at the RE. Once that was done, Nadia had her first experience in a car seat. She hated being strapped in, but once we were in motion she went to sleep (pretty typical behavior for babies).

Tuesday night was less stressful, but I got barely any sleep. She was accustomed to the NICU beds which had soft boundaries around her, and she was allowed to sleep on her belly. Of course at home neither of those are allowed due to SIDS. So she and I got very little sleep. I did pass her off to Paul at 3am and asked him to hold her for 30 minutes so I could get a little sleep. The best trick we've found so far (aside from letting her sleep in one of our arms) is to swaddle her up (see photo). I am sure she is very glad though to be in a place where her heel isn't being pricked all the time (see photo).

Wednesday morning we took her to the pediatrician. I think I made a good choice as Dr. M was very relaxed. She looked at Nadia's coloring and said the bilirubin test was not necessary, and although she had lost more weight (5 lb 11 oz with her diaper on whereas the previous day when she weighed 5 lb 12 oz that was w/o a diaper), she wasn't concerned about that either. She told me to stop supplementing with formula which I have done, and she also wanted me to stop using the contact shield (which the lactation nurses suggest the moms of NICU babies use as it makes nursing easier for the babies). I haven't completely weaned her off the shield yet. We go back next week for another weight check. I am hoping at the bare minimum she will not have lost any more weight, and I am actually hoping she'll have gained weight. Maybe she can get back to 6 lbs by then? She is nursing well so I hope that means she's putting on some weight. I am nursing her every 2 hours around the clock to try to keep her belly full. Sometimes during the night she wakes up every hour so sometimes only 30 minutes passes between the ending of a feeding and the start of the next feeding.

On the way home from the pediatrician, we stopped at my university. My mom ran up to my office to check my mail. The letter I was waiting for was there! I am being promoted to Associate Professor in August. WOOHOOO! The letter was dated 6-24 (Nadia's birthday)! What a relief to know I don't need to apply for promotion again in the fall as it was a VERY time consuming process. It also helps me to feel more at ease about resigning off of some committees so I will have more time to be a MOMMY.

Last night went MUCH better. Although there still were stretches where I only got 30 minutes of rest in between feedings, there were a couple of times where I got 60-90 minutes of sleep, and that made all the difference. I felt like a new woman today! Although my feet, ankles, and calves are still VERY swollen, I can now put my feet flat on the ground which is making getting around easier. My balance is still off so when I climb the stairs with Nadia I put her in the sling.

My mom has been a big help. She is headed back to MD tomorrow. We are so grateful that she has spent the last week with us!!! She loves us very much to be willing to transport me to feedings every 2-3 hours while in the hospital, etc. Nadia has taken quite a few naps in her Grandma's arms. Paul's parents stopped in last night after Paul's mom's 4th chemo treatment. Paul's mom also loves to hold Nadia. :-)

I will close with a few observations of changes we have noticed in Nadia over the past week:

• When she was born, she didn't have any eyebrows or eye lashes. We have watched her eyelashes come in. They have gone from blonde to brown and have grown a little bit each day. Right now they are very uneven. I am curious to see how long they'll be in the end. I have long eyelashes. So far about the only quality she has similar to me is that she gets the hiccups alot, LOL.


• Her umbilical cord stump fell off today.


• She doesn't cry as much when her diaper is changed as she did at first.
  
• She has greatly improved in her abilities to nurse.