Tough Day

Well I woke up not feeling well (stuffed up, headache, and fever), but I took 2 Advil and went to church anyhow. However I still wasn't feeling well so I didn't stay for Sunday School (and I've really been enjoying the class I've been in this summer that was ending today), and soon after I got home I went to bed for a nap. I slept for three hours. One thing did finally happen today which I had been wanting to happen, but yet it's still hard. As of this morning I was 18dpo, but finally this afternoon it changed to cd1. If I had my Beta appointment at 17dpo like they usually do, I would have had 21 day LP!!! Oi vey! I mean that's great if you're pg, but to have a 18-21 day lp when you are not pg is just Not Fun. My last PIO shot was at 13dpo, and I knew it would delay the start but didn't think it would delay the start THIS much. So although today is not "find out day" which I think is the hardest (that was Tuesday for me), cd1 is still a tough day both physically and emotionally in part because I feel very "hormonal." The other thing that was tough about going to church is that it is a setting in which people ask you "how are you" but they are often just being polite and don't really want to know so you just say "fine thank you" or whatever. Two ladies at church today gave me hugs and told me they were praying for me. They knew what what on with me this week. But others of course have no idea. I wanted to say "I lost triplets this week" but instead said "I'm doing fine." There are times when I wish we had a different standard greeting in our culture that didn't involve asking how someone is doing. I really did not want to say "fine." So I am not going to the roller skating party tonight (13th bday for one of our nieces). I am just too fragile today...too prone to tears.

I wrote a couple of friends yesterday who I knew had done ivf more than once, and both said they would definitely do another fresh cycle before a FET. One had done two fresh and one FET in Hershey and then went to NYU and got pg from her third fresh cycle (her daughter is now in elementary school). So she also thought it was wise to try another center. NYU's stats are neck and neck with the one in Chicago. Another friend said, "To do a FET with one seems like a lot to go through (emotionally, physically and financially) with pretty slim odds of success. If you do another fresh cycle, you will likely have additional embryos to freeze and then doing at least one FET later seems more viable." So that's the direction we're still leaning.