38

Today is my 38th birthday. What a difference compared to my 35th birthday. That was my worst one because at that point we had tried to conceive for 5 years and tried to adopt for 2.5 years within the US and 4 months from Ukraine. We knew our time with Lifetime (domestic adoption) was coming to a close and also were having our doubts that our documents (which had made it to Ukraine and been translated) would be submitted before they expired. At that point in my life I had very little hope I'd ever become a mom. Just three years later I have two beautiful children. Thank you, Lord! There are times I feel a little "odd" due to my age compared to the age of my kids, but I no longer feel the sense of despair regarding an upcoming birthday like I did when I was childless. The fact that I'm on the older side for having a toddler and an infant was reinforced at the Mom's Night Out last week. One mom was talking about how she was so old and others were commenting on how much younger they were compared to her. So I asked her how old she was (she has 4 kids of whom the youngest is 21 months old). She told me 33. Umm I don't think 33 is old. A doctor put "elderly multigravida" on my medical record when I was 35 so I guess I've been elderly for 3 years now? LOL! No, I am not elderly!!!

It would have been nice if Ian had given me a gift of a nice night of sleep for my birthday. Maybe he will do so tonight, but last night he slept from 8:10-2:15 and 3:55-5:30 (less than 8 hours). I didn't get to bed until 9:10 due to putting Nadia to bed, pumping, etc. I nursed Ian for an hour+ and then Paul took over at 3:25am with a bottle of EBM, which I greatly appreciated. I invited a friend from MOPS over today with her daughter who just turned 1 a week ago. I thought some adult conversation would be a nice treat on my birthday, but I'll be postponing those plans as last night my throat started hurting (along with a headache, etc.). It hasn't gone away, and I don't want to spread my germs. I'll have to record Nadia singing happy birthday to me. That will be a special treat! Nadia took another 3 hour nap yesterday but then only slept 10 hours last night. Paul and I were planning to go out to dinner tomorrow night. I am not sure if we will because yesterday our neighbor found out her mom is dying. I left a message last night asking her if she wanted me to find someone else to watch the kids while I'm at work on Friday and that we could reschedule our date. I felt badly as yesterday was Beth's birthday. It certainly wasn't a happy one for her. I think she's about 3 years older than me (and her youngest is in the 6th grade which again shows I'm a bit old for the age of my kids). I could tell when Gabby and Alexis came over yesterday that they had both been crying. I felt badly for them. I am grateful that neither Paul or I have had to experience the loss of a parent. I hope that Nadia and Ian get to spend time for many more years with their four grandparents.