Double standards

Nadia is very quick to notice if I do something differently with her brothers than I did with her when she was that age. For example, I offered Oliver a treat for good behavior in the Soul Patrol choir. I said she wasn't in a choir when she was four-years-old, and even if she had been I know she wouldn't have had any problems because she was in the summer musical at the church where they go to AWANA the summer she turned four years old, and that was the program in which she smiled to beat the band and did all the motions (plus a few extra) and sang her heart out. She didn't need any extra encouragement to do the right thing in that instance. Kids tend to think it's unfair if you don't treat them exactly the same. But fair doesn't always mean equal because each child has different strengths, weaknesses, needs, etc. Recently my dad pointed out a double standard my mom had in that she had accepted Facebook requests from men she had dated 50+ years ago, but she asked my dad to decline a friend request from a woman he dated in 1963.

I think a fairly typical double standard between men/women comes to sick days. Paul came down with a GI bug and didn't go to church with us yesterday morning and didn't come down from the bedroom until after 4:00 pm. He did play with the kids and have dinner with us until the kids went to bed and then he disappeared again so I watched my football game alone (but I was able to talk on the phone with my Dad during the game, which was nice). Over the past 8 1/2 years the only time I have had a "sick day" where I stayed in bed while the kids were awake was when I was in the hospital. I used to be able to take a nap when I was sick if I did so when the kids were napping, but now that none of them take naps, the only thing I can do differently when I am sick is go to bed when Oliver goes to bed (8:00). I know I'm not the only mom who doesn't get sick days. It seems to be pretty typical that dads get sick days but moms don't. During the 20 years I had a job I always had to make arrangements if I was going to take a sick day (find a substitute, etc.). Paul didn't let anyone know at work, but I heard his phone vibrating at 6:30 and woke Paul up to tell him someone was trying to call him, and it was his brother checking to see if he was on his way to work (because he's usually already there at that time). I think if any of the workers at the plant didn't show up without calling in sick that would be counted as a "strike" against them. Well the upside to his illness is that we are seeing more of him even though he's staying in the bedroom a lot more than usual. Hopefully he will be feeling better soon and none of us will get whatever he has.

Speaking of "fairness," Nadia commented yesterday that the kids in church said they didn't have school on Monday (Martin Luther King, Jr. Day). I had planned to just have a regular school day (just like last week when many of them had a snow day), but then I said if we completed an art project plus they did a math lesson, we would skip all the other subjects (I won't count it as one of our official school days). We did two-thirds of the charcoal project before lunch, and then they had a break to play with their guinea pigs and then have 30 minutes of screen time (iPad for Nadia and Wii for Ian). We'll finish the project after lunch.

Yesterday in church Nadia and Oliver went to their Sunday School classes in the first service and to the kids' choir rehearsal in the second service. Ian chose to go with me to the first worship service even though it meant he would sit alone for about half of the service while I was on the platform with the choir. He was very well behaved. Way to go, Ian!

I took these bathtub pictures on Saturday morning using my speedlight that I rarely use. I really needed to use the Expodisc also, but I didn't and I had to work on adjusting the white balance in Lightroom. There is definite room for improvement, but I am trying to take a wider variety of pictures. Ian was holding those numbers up and told me that is how old I am. Well it's how old I'll be in three months. Let's not rush things, Ian. Ha ha!

The Steelers WON last night. It wasn't their prettiest win as we had zero touchdowns and six field goals, but it means we're playing the Patriots next Sunday to see which team will be in the Superbowl! Go Steelers! Speaking of football games I'll share one more double standard. It is a BIG deal to Paul that I not schedule anything that would mean he couldn't watch one of his NY Giants football games. Once or twice a season his game isn't aired in our area, but he watches every game he can. Similarly, I like to watch all my Steeler football games if possible. It was mystifying to me that he scheduled the Christmas gift exchange with his parents during my football game - and not just a regular game but a Playoff game. I am certain he would never have done so if it had meant missing part of his game. Go figure. We human beings are complicated to be certain!