Suspense is killing me!!!

Usually the nurse calls around 1:30pm, but since she called at 11:45am on Monday I got my hopes up for another early call. :-) I have been waiting for my cell phone to ring plus hitting refresh on my online medical record every few minutes. I'm not able to get much work done right now. Thankfully I was teaching from 8:00-10:50 so it's just been the last two hours that have been nerve wracking. It was MUCH easier to teach today. I woke up really early (4:30) and couldn't go back to sleep bc I was hungry. I must not have eaten enough yesterday as that was only 6 hours of sleep and I prefer 8-9. I was a bit queasy from when I got up until I'd say about 9:00ish. Somewhere in my second class I started to feel pretty normal and stopped snacking. I munched throughout the morning on pretzels and graham crackers (plus had an English muffin at 4:30 and a yogurt at 6:00). When I buy yogurt the next time I won't buy the "lite" kind as I am going to try to avoid artificial sweetners while pg except for in chewing gum. The main things I eat with artificial sweetners are one yogurt each morning (it cuts the calories in 1/2), fruit flavored water at work that has zero calories (I'll just go back to plain water), and no sugar added ice cream for dessert with dinner (if I start to want ice cream again I'll just buy regular Klondike bars rather than the "Slim a Bear" kind). I don't think there's anything else in my diet that's taboo while pg as I have never been a coffee drinker nor do I eat fish (worries of the mercury level with some fish).

Baby aspirin

I keep wondering why my RE doesn't encourage all patients to take baby aspirin. The first time I took it was the inj/iui cycle I got the bfp in 2005. I forgot to take it with the ivf this summer, but I have been taking it for this FET (81mg a day).

Here's something I read about baby aspirin today (written by an RE):

"In a randomized, double-blind placebo-controlled study, 149 patients went through IVF cycles, with the only difference being the use of a single 100 mg aspirin (not available in the U. S.) a day in one group and placebo in the other. Patients in the aspirin group did much better than those on the placebo. Statistically, they had better numbers of eggs, higher estrogen levels, more uterine and ovarian blood flow, and almost double the implantation and pregnancy rates of the placebo group.

The authors concluded that one baby aspirin a day seems to be a useful and safe treatment for women who undergo assisted reproductive procedures. At Reproductive Partners, on the basis of early reports, we began recommending in early 1998 that all of our IVF patients routinely take baby (81 mg.) aspirin. At present there is no evidence to suggest that this recommendation should be extended to women trying to conceive without assistance, or using conventional fertility treatments."

This same RE said "In general, we look at one hCG level 16 days after retrieval and want it to be at least 100. We don't do more hCGs in that case. If the level is below 100, we repeat it in 4 days and if it does not double or go up at least 66.7% every two days, we feel that the prognosis is guarded." My hCG was done at the equivalent of 17 days after retrieval and was closer to 200 than 100 so I feel very encouraged. :-)

Shots #70-72

This morning I had shots #70-71 and will have #72 tonight. I have 2 a day 5 days a week and 3 a day on Tuesdays and Fridays. Let me tell you the shots are SOOOO much easier to take when I know they're not in vain. Although I look forward to the day when I can stop them, I would gladly do them the whole pgcy if my baby needed them! Now if we include the 59 shots I had this summer for the fresh cycle (which produced this embryo), I've had 131 shots for baby bean so far! But it will all be SOOOO worth it if we get to hold this little one in our arms this summer!!!!

Ginger Tea

Tea is soooo much better than soda. I have always really disliked carbonated drinks. They make me burp for one thing! I am still nauseous today but it's just like the m/s I had in 2005. If I just keep munching on crackers or pretzels I am fine. Paul was relieved I slept much better (as my lack of sleep also caused him not to get much either). I am relieved to know I won't be THAT sick during the first trimester. I can handle this level of morning sickness much better than what I thought was m/s but was really the flu. One thing that's different than 2005 is during that brief pgcy I really craved cereal. I was living off of it! It sounds revolting to me now. But at least my English muffin didn't sound revolting this morning whereas it sounded revolting yesterday. The one thing that cracks me up the most is I have NO desire for ice cream! I might break a record for how many days (or weeks?) I go without eating ice cream considering I usually have some EVERY day. Funny how a little tiny baby can change our food preferences! Paul was concerned about me mainly only eating crackers and pretzels, but I told him it's quite alright. The baby will get what he/she needs even if that's mainly what I eat for a few weeks. Paul doesn't have any signs of the flu so hopefully I didn't pass it on to him, and hopefully the four Benners are also starting to feel better as I am today.

I checked my calendar from 2005 and my first u/s with that pgcy was at 5w0d which is where I'll be this Friday. So who knows, maybe I'll have my first u/s THIS week??? I am sure they'll tell me tomorrow. Paul is stopping to pick up more PIO today at the RE's office (there's no RX for it - they just give it to me directly). I also want to ask when I get switched to an OB/GYN. I think maybe at 10 weeks? I'll ask tomorrow about that also.

Paul's next project (for me) is to massage away the lumps of medicine. I forgot to massage the injection sites while I was in Chicago. I am used to Paul doing this for me. :-) The lumps are on both sides and much bigger than before. He said the one almost feels like a bone it's so hard (but it's a lump of medicine). Sitting has been more painful lately so although the process of getting rid of the lump is painful, it's worth it in the long run!

Guess which line is darker???

The TEST line is now darker than the control line. WAHOOOO! It popped up first and is the darker line!!! It's now a toss-up to me which is the hpt that made me the happiest - the first one (Friday) or today's. YAHOOOOO!

I definitely had the flu yesterday. I should have stayed home! My students in my 5pm class said I looked awful. I was shaking my fever was so high. I let them out at 6:30 instead of 7:30 and all I did when I got home was take 3 Tylenol and write a note to Paul asking him to wake me up for my shot. I was in bed by about 6:50 and aside from him asking me to roll over for the shot I didn't wake up until 5:00am (and normally I pee a few times during the night). So I got 10 hours of sleep and woke up cool as a cucumber. I ate my normal breakfast (English muffin plus a yogurt) and I feel a little queasy - but just what is normal morning sickness for me (like in 2005) not like Sunday/Monday when I had the stomach flu. It's a relief to know morning sickness isn't THAT awful. But if my morning sickness ever gets worse I am prepared. Paul even stopped on his way home from school yesterday and bought me some ginger tea as that had been suggested and I don't like carbonated drinks so I would rather that than Ginger Ale. Part of the reason I tested this morning was I was worried maybe a fever is bad for baby, but baby seems to be doing just fine and dandy. I pray for little bean many times a day and am so thankful for all the others who are praying for him or her!!!

This little one survived being at -196°C for almost 3 months and then going through the thawing process and has hatched and implanted. So the next two big hurdles are #1 tomorrow that the hCG is going up properly (I think it is based on the hpts!) and #2 that the ultrasounds show he/she has implanted in my uterus (not another ectopic).

In terms of what can be seen by u/s, the gestational sac can be seen when the hCG is at least 1,000, the yolk sac at 2,500, the fetal pole at 5,000, and the heartbeat at 10,000.

For HCG levels <1200 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is 48-72 hours.
For HCG levels 1200 to 6000 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is 72-96 hours.
For HCG levels >6000 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is >96 hours.

HCG levels peak at about eight to 10 weeks of pregnancy and then decline, remaining at lower levels for the rest of the pregnancy.

So if my levels doubled at the rates listed above (every 2 days and then every 3 days and then every 4 days) it would mean the gestational sac could be seen as early as this Saturday, the yolk sac by next Tuesday (11/20), the fetal pole by next Friday (11/23), and the hearbeat in 2 weeks (11/27). Of course sometimes hCG goes up faster than this. I have had friends who saw a h/b at exactly 5 weeks (which I will be this Friday). So maybe I'll get to see a h/b next week. I should definitely see it by the end of the month though if baby bean hangs on tight!!!

This is going to be a VERY happy Thanksgiving!!! First I am finally pg after ttc over 5 years and second my sister who lives in Turkey is flying in next Monday to MD and we're driving down to see them next Tuesday. I haven't seen Yvonne, Jenna, and Drew for 18 months, Joe for almost 2 years, and haven't met Josh yet (born on St. Patrick's Day). What an awesome Thanksgiving this will be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Might be the flu

Wendy just told me that all 4 of them in Chicago have been throwing up. So this might not be morning sickness. I guess I could have taken today off then! I kept telling Paul last night I didn't think I could teach today, but I thought if it was m/s that I can't very well take off for that as I might have m/s the rest of the semester (4 weeks including this week). Plus I had cancelled class last week Wed/Fri due to the conference so I felt I needed to come in today. The good news is that hopefully I won't feel THIS sick for another 10 weeks or so. We shall see. I guess there's no way to tell thus far whether it's m/s or the flu or a combination of the two. I'm going to take it easy tomorrow except for one mtg at school at 2pm although if I am still feeling sick I might just tell them I have the flu and not go (since I very well might!).

Beta is in

It is 187.8 today which the nurse said is good. I was of course hoping it would be a little higher, but she didn't seem concerned at all. When they called me in June 2005 to tell me my hcg was 11.8 at 12dpo they were definitely concerned. Of course they wanted to do my Beta on Thursday so I am sure today they were expecting a lower number than what they'd be expecting on Thursday since I went 3 days early from when they usually do a Beta after a FET. So the goal for Wednesday's Beta is 374 although I remember being told in 2005 as long as it went up 66% in 48 hours that was okay so that would mean we need it to be at least 310.

I just read one article from the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology which said that their cut-off level for predicting a viable pregnancy whether after a fresh or frozen transfer is 76mIU at 12 days past transfer, and today I am 11 days past transfer.

Another site said, "At 17 DPO, avg HCG level is 132 mIU/ml, with a typical range of 17-429 mIU/ml." That puts me above average. YEAH!

As a point of comparison, the highest my hCG got in 2005 was 168.2 on July 5, and at 17dpo (which is what I think I am today) it was 48.3 so it's a lot higher than it was 2 years ago! So anyhow it seems so far so good and we'll just keep praying for this little bean to keep growing and be a VERY sticky BFP!

Little bean is making me very sick!

It's kind of amazing how a TINY little embryo can make one feel so awful! I got about 2-3 hours of sleep last night although I was in bed for about 10 hours (minus the time spent in the bathroom). Paul didn't get much sleep either. He says he's sleeping somewhere else tonight. :-( I can't blame him though. He went to the mini-mart about 5 minutes from home at 10pm and bought me 2 small bottles of ginger ale. They didn't have saltines. I had forgotten to suggest pretzels. He made me some popcorn but that did NOT work. At 2:30am he got me some yogurt and I ate 1/2 of it and that helped and then at 4:30am I ate the other half. Then at 6:00am he brought me up a small dish of oatmeal which seemed to go down fine as well. So I haven't actually thrown up again, but boy do I feel terrible! Plus I have a fever like I always get when I am sleep deprived and I only have ibuprofen here at work which is a no no during pgcy so I need to bring in some Tylenol instead. At 7:00am I stopped at the grocery store in town (which was closed when he went out last night) and got pretzels, animal crackers, 2 liters of ginger ale, and some other plain type crackers. The pretzels are working well so far. It's really hard to teach though. I kept my 8:00 class the whole period but let the 9:00 and 10:00 ones out early as I felt like I was going to keel over or puke in class. I am quite certain I won't be keeping my 5:00 class til 7:30 like I usually do. Now I think I'm going to lie down on the floor of my office and use my coat as a pillow and try to take a little nap until the nurse calls me with the beta # (probably about 1:30pm). Emotionally I am THRILLED to be pg but physically I feel horrible. I am taking the advice some have given me and am trying to just eat a little bit all throughout the day and so far so good in terms of not throwing up yet today. No more meals just lots of little snacks for me!

Definitely pg

To be honest, I am no longer very concerned about whether my HCG is going to be high enough tomorrow or not. I am almost positive it will be. I am now throwing up. I said to Paul earlier this nausea was way worse than it ever was in 2005. I tried to go to bed at 8pm as I was feeling exhausted, but I couldn't sleep as my stomach hurt too much. I just threw up a LOT and will not go into the details but my sweet hubby is up there cleaning up after me. I am grateful for the reassurance, but I don't need THIS strong of a symptom, LOL. So a new prayer request is that I don't puke too much tomorrow as I have to be at school for 12 hours and don't want to run out of class too often to throw up. The last time I had the stomach flu was 1996. The only other time I've thrown up since then was after the egg retrieval. I am not accustomed to this! Now I'm not sure if I should eat something right now or not??? Any tips and tricks you all can share with me about how to decrease my odds of continued vomiting are greatly appreciated!!! At least now maybe I'll be able to fall asleep as the pain is a lot less now that I've emptied my stomach. Sorry this is so gross of a post but I really could use some advice!

Nausea has set in!

Well I woke up this morning and had the familiar feeling from 2005 that I need to eat NOW. And Wendy makes the most delicious homemade granola so I had a delicous breakfast. :-) I haven't actually thrown up, but I've felt icky all day. In fact I just ate a bowl of cereal for dinner and it didn't help whereas eating breakfast and lunch caused the nausea to subside for awhile. When Michael dropped me off at Cheri's house (where my car had been parked), he said that he hoped I felt better soon, and I said nope I was hoping to still feel icky if it means my little one is dong well! I am still in awe. Periodically I would say to Michael as we flew to BWI and then drove to PA, "I am pg!" What a miracle that the FET worked even though we only transferred one embie. I am in awe!!! I am not going to hpt tomorrow since I'm having the Beta.