Two Gates

Paul has been busy with house projects the last few days. Friday night he sprayed our apple trees which are being eaten alive by gypsy moths; Saturday he mowed the lawn and installed two gates I bought after I attended the monthly ladies breakfast that morning. It didn't seem feasible to put a gate at the bottom of our stairwell without drilling holes into the banister. So instead we put a gate from the kitchen to the foyer and the living room to the foyer. Nadia can explore the family room, kitchen, dining room, and living room, but she doesn't have access to the foyer, half-bathroom, and most importantly the staircase going upstairs. The one in the living room has a latch; the one in the kitchen we have to hop over.

It's amazing to see all the little ways she changes on a daily basis. Every day her walking skills continue to improve. She walks more and crawls a little less each day. The most recent addition to her vocabulary is the "L" sound. It's also the first consonant that she often combines with a vowel and a different consonant (D). In the past the same consonant would be on either side of the vowel (ex. dada). Thankfully she's also gone back to not crying when her diaper is being changed. I am glad that phase is over (at least for now anyhow).

I have a sort of love/hate attitude towards the symptoms of pregnancy. When I feel good, I get worried, and then when the nausea returns I feel relieved and encouraged that I'm still pregnant, but of course it's not exactly fun feeling sick to one's stomach, LOL. At those moments I wonder why I desire reassurance that I'm pregnant when I'm feeling fine. The one constant symptom has been exhaustion. The last two nights I went to bed around 8pm (whereas my usual bedtime is 9:30), and whenever possible I take a nap during one of Nadia's naps. Thankfully the heartburn hasn't been as bad thus far. I am very grateful. The next most frequent symptom has been hunger. So far I don't think I've gained any weight, but boy I am eating more than usual! Certain foods are totally unappealing (chicken is now 3 for 3 in terms of upsetting my stomach while pregnant), or the smell of it being cooked is revolting (like the bacon being fried at the breakfast yesterday morning). One thing that's different than the last pregnancy is my desire for ice cream went away, which shocked me as usually I like to have some every day. However, this time I am craving ice cream even more than usual. Friday night before Paul got home from school, I took Nadia to the "mom & pop" ice cream place that is about 1/2 mile from our home. We shared a cup of choc/van soft ice cream. Yum!!!

You know you're a mommy when...

1. Your first consideration is your child's nap schedule when you make a doctor's appointment for yourself

2. A room in your home can go from looking orderly to looking like a tornado went through it in five minutes flat (one of Nadia's favorite things is to take down almost all of the books from the bottom two shelves of her bookshelf - the one she's pictured standing by in yesterday's post)

3. You find cereal in very odd places (like a piece of Kix on a step going upstairs or a Cheerio on the floor in your bathroom)

4. You know what fun twanging a door stopper can be

5. You try not to leave your shoes on the floor (or they will end up in someone's mouth)

6. You realize that a jacuzzi tub makes a great "playpen" for your child to play in while you are getting a shower

7. Your primary consideration for choosing when to run errands is whether it will mess up your child's nap schedule if he/she ends up sleeping in the car for a few minutes

8. You find yourself saying "be careful" about 50 million times a day

9. You sweep your kitchen floor every day (instead of once a week)

10. The highlights of your day are the smiles and laughter of a child

Nadia has been saying mama quite frequently these days. She often now includes mama in the middle of her crying or fussing (she never says dada, baba, or gaga when crying). Yesterday when I was washing her face after a meal (not her favorite activity in life), she said "mama" very loudly in a crying sort of voice. Maybe she was trying to ask me to stop washing her face? I do find it interesting that ma is the only syllable that she utters when she's crying waaahhh.

Thank you, Nadia!!!

On vacation Nadia got in the habit of getting up between 5:00-5:30 almost every day. Since we have been home she's been waking up between 5:15-5:45. Well yesterday she didn't wake up until 6:25, and this morning she woke up at 6:50. WOOHOO! I really am grateful for a little extra sleep especially since I stayed up until 10pm last night (later than usual for me) to finish reading a book after I got home from choir rehearsal. As expected, I have less energy than usual these days, so getting after 6am is greatly appreciated!! Some days I have taken a nap during one of Nadia's naps (which I hadn't done for months), but usually I feel I have too much I need to do during her naps. I hope this trend of her sleeping longer at night continues! She had been getting about 10.5 hours of sleep at night on average, and the last 2 nights it's been at least 11 and getting closer to 12 hours! Her naps have been at 8am and noon lately, but in light of her getting up later I am trying to shift her toward 9am and 1pm. Of course I made my 10am u/s appt for next Tues with an 8am nap in mind, LOL.

While we were on vacation I received an acceptance from NAEYC. I had submitted a proposal in December for their next conference which will be in November in DC. I attended this early childhood conference (along with at least 20,000 other people) two years ago in Chicago (where I was when I found out I was pg with Nadia). It's the only conference I had submitted a proposal for the upcoming academic year. Now that I'm expecting another baby, I am very glad I'm not scheduled to speak anywhere next spring. I usually attend at least one conference every spring, but I am definitely glad I don't have any such plans for spring 2010. I am so grateful that I have family members living near two cities where many conventions are held (DC and Chicago)! It makes it possible for me to take Nadia with me. :-)

Have I mentioned how much I love being a mommy? There are so many precious moments along the way. Usually when we play peekaboo, I cover and uncover my face OR I cover Nadia's face and she uncovers herself. Well yesterday I put the Steeler blanket over my face and waited for her to pull it off. She thought it was SOOO funny. I love hearing her laugh!!!

Climb Every Mountain

Nadia loves to climb. If she escapes my sight for 30 seconds I can pretty much guarantee I'll find her climbing the stairs. Once I must have let her out of my sight for 60 seconds as she made it all the way up and into "her" bathroom before I found her. Paul will not be happy with me when he finds that out. The gate I bought didn't work for our stairs. Here's a video of her climbing the steps; she's distracted by me filming her so she isn't quite as fast as usual. I like the big smile at the end! I am certainly getting FAR more exercise now than I did at 6 weeks pg with her. I was probably on the overly cautious side with that pgcy. I did very little lifting, standing, walking, etc during the first trimester and then again after the placenta previa diagnosis. I admit that crossed my mind during the u/s on Tuesday, that we were miscarrying because I was too active the last 3 weeks. I keep reminding myself that plenty of people keep up their usual activities in the first trimester. How can I avoid lifting my 21 lb daughter???

I'll feel much better once we see a h/b on Tuesday. I am truly at peace with just seeing one. I'll be happy if we see one or if we see two. Although I always wanted at least 3 children, I thought they'd each be probably 2 years apart in age or something like that. It wasn't like I pictured myself having three age 18 months and younger (especially in my late 30's). I realize it would be rather exhausting for awhile. After the scare of not seeing any heartbeat, I will truly be happy as long as we see one on Tuesday. I still don't think it's impossible we'll see two though as the more I read online the more stories I hear of additional sacs and heartbeats being discovered at subsequent ultrasounds (much later than 6 weeks at times even after IVF). I do believe whatever happens will be for the best. I have prayed that from the start. God knows whether it's best I carry one baby or two the next few months. I trust that whatever happens is His perfect will for us.

Nadia is just starting to show signs of entering the "me do it" stage. Previously independence was encouraged by me rather than initiated by her (such as feeding herself finger foods). I used to brush her teeth/gums with a finger brush. I had to stop that once she got her top two teeth as she was always biting my index finger. Ouch! Last weekend I bought her a toddler toothbrush, and now SHE wants to brush her teeth rather than let Mommy do it for her. "ME DO IT!" :-)

Feeling Better

Well now that I've had time to process everything (the u/s was 7 hours ago), I am feeling much better. Dr. A was very happy with what he saw on the u/s, and he said the hCG level was very good also. I know many women don't see a h/b this early. My first u/s was at 6w4d for Nadia (by my calculations, which were a little different than Dr. A's). Thinking back, I had b/w about one day earlier than today with Nadia, and my hCG was in the 4,000's. So my hCG is still 3 times higher than it was with my pgcy with Nadia. According to Betabase, the median for singleton's on this day is 7,000 so I am still quite a bit higher than that although I've fallen a little below the median for twins on this day. My theory is that at some point I was carrying twins. Maybe I still am, but if not I do believe two implanted and were growing for at least a little while. It's the only way my u/s plus hCG levels make sense. By the time my hCG was this high with Nadia - we saw her h/b.

A friend who had her retrieval one day after mine has had hCG levels almost identical to mine. She also had her first u/s today at 5w5d, and they saw 2 sacs. In the one sac they did see a h/b (YAY!), and in the other sac they didn't see anything (not even a yolk sac). She's having another u/s next week also, and they're expecting just to see one growing baby although it's still possible she'll have twins. I know that it's possible we'll see two h/bs next week, but I've changed my expectations so I'm only expecting to see one and will be pleasantly surprised if we see two. I don't view two as impossible though given my hCG was over 12,000 today. I think what upset me so much this morning was I was expecting either to see one sac with a h/b OR two sacs (and then probably not any h/b). To only see one sac but no h/b just seemed like a bad scenario to me given I figured my hCG had to be above 10,000 today. I know many women don't see a h/b until part way through the 6th week or the beginning of the 7th week, but usually their hCG hasn't reached 10,000 yet. It's funny because I had told Paul that even if we saw twins today the risk of losing one of them (vanishing twin syndrome) was really high. I've seen it happen SO many times on the discussion boards where a woman is first expecting quadruplets and one is reabsorbed and she gives birth to triplets or triplets become twins or twins become a singleton. I just forgot about that possibility during the u/s this morning, LOL.

Ironically, Paul had adjusted to the idea of twins. He told me that he was surprised when it was only one since everyone kept teasing him that I was having multiples. He said he was just hoping it wasn't triplets, but the idea of twins wasn't scary to him any more. Well it looks like his wish for just one jellybean is probably what is coming true, and really that is a huge miracle given it took us 5 1/2 years to conceive Nadia. I will keep praying for our little jellybean, and I have great hope that we'll see his/her heart beating away next Tuesday. :-)

5w6d Ultrasound

I have been both excited and nervous about this first ultrasound. The ultrasounds in 2005 were all very sad ones since my hCG was going up (although it started very low at 11.6) but nothing could be seen in my uterus. I kept wondering whether we'd see no sacs (either an ectopic or early miscarriage), one sac, two sacs, or three sacs. I had my hopes up for twins since my hCG was 3 times higher than it was with Nadia and at the median for twins according to Betabase. For a couple of decades I always said I wanted 3-4 children, and I figured this would be my last pregnancy so having twins would likely be the only way I'd end up with 3 children.


Right away one gestational sac (and yolk sac) was visible. Dr. A looked around to see if there might be one more since we transferred three, but he couldn't find any other sacs. He said that sometimes a second one isn't visible until a couple more weeks, but that 90% of the time if only one is seen with the first ultrasound it's because there's only one baby. He then spent a lot of time trying to find the baby's heartbeat. He couldn't find it. He didn't seem concerned because of how early it is, and he said I should stay on the PIO shots and come back in 2 weeks for another ultrasound. He said if I was nervous I could come back in one week. I said I'd prefer to wait only one week especially since my hips were very bruised and this could shorten my time on shots by one week. We should definitely see a h/b next Tuesday at 6w6d if this is a viable pgcy. In light of not seeing a h/b, he had me have blood drawn so we could check my hCG level to make sure everything still seemed okay.


I was of course concerned. I was relieved by the fact that at first he planned to wait 2 more weeks for another u/s, and also by how excited he was and how many pictures he printed out and gave us from the u/s. However I was concerned about not seeing a h/b. I know it should be seen by the time hCG reaches 10,000. I figured it was "iffy" that we'd see a h/b if I was carrying twins as in that case the hCG would need to be 20,000, and I figured that was not a guarantee. Some do see a h/b in the 5th week, but it's not considered abnormal not to see one even as late as 6w3d. We did see a h/b with my first u/s with Nadia, but that was at 6w3d if I remember correctly. Anyhow I was concerned when he saw only one sac and no h/b. It didn't seem good that my hCG was 2,506 last Wednesday and 6 days later isn't to 10,000 yet? Maybe there were two that implanted at first and were both producing hCG and one stopped growing since then. That would be plausible and be a good reason why my hCG was 2,506 last Wed and yet we didn't see a h/b today.


Anyhow I have a mixture of emotions. I am thrilled we saw one gestational and yolk sac. That's far better than my 2005 ultrasounds. I admit I feel sad about losing 2 more blastocysts. There were 10 month old triplet baby girls in the nursery on Sunday (naturally conceived). I've said it before - this is one of the hardest aspects of IVF for me - you know about these tiny lives at a stage when their chance of survival is minimal. We had 20 embryos through these 2 ivf cycles, and probably 4 of them made it to blastocyst (the embryologist thought the morula we transferred would be a blast in a couple of hours), and it seems at the most two will make it as babies in our arms. Of course the good news is that I am pregnant. Two years ago at this point we had been trying to conceive for 5 years and trying to adopt for 2 1/2 years within the US and 6 months from Ukraine, and my hope of ever becoming a mom was almost completely gone. God has given us one precious miracle, and hopefully in January I'll give birth to our second miracle. Please pray that next Tuesday we see a heartbeat!! I'm sure once we feel more certain that this pregnancy will have a happy ending, my grief over the other lost embryos will fade away.

I've been waiting and waiting and waiting for the call of my hCG level. I just checked and found the answer online - 12,081. The good news is that this is a good level considering what mine was last week. That's a doubling time of 62.57 hours which is still faster than usual for a singleton pregnancy as usually it slows down once it gets higher. It really makes me wonder though why we didn't see a h/b. Maybe I am really expecting twins? That would be a perfect explanation as my hCG isn't high enough to see 2 h/bs. Maybe one can't always see a h/b even if there's one baby and the hCG is 12,000? Well I just hope and pray this one baby that we saw today will hang on tight and grow for at least 7 more months. I really, really hope we see a h/b next week. I am very glad we don't have to wait 2 weeks for the next ultrasound. If I had to do it over again, I wish I had picked Thursday or Friday of this week for my first u/s as the chances of seeing a h/b then would have been much greater than today at 5w6d. I guess my impatience of wondering how many babies I am carrying has cost me a few extra PIO shots and a little more anxiety. I know once you see the h/b the risk of miscarriage drops to 5%. There are NEVER any guarantees, but I remember feeling a lot less worried once we saw the h/b with Nadia. The good news is that this pregnancy is doing wonders for my prayer life! :-)

Expanding Vocabulary

Last night I went to an excellent concert at my church at 7pm. The group was called Re-Creation. They primarily minister in hospitals and homes for Veterans. One girl from our church is in the group. I went to the concert alone as Paul's not a big concert person plus Nadia went to bed early last night (6pm). The previous night she didn't sleep well, so she was rather tired yesterday. Normally she sleeps 11 hours at the most at night, but last night she slept 20 minutes shy of 12 hours. Today Paul gets to stay home because of the Memorial Day holiday. :-)

This photo was taken in Antigua showing Nadia enjoying one of her "toys." I am still at a loss what to get Nadia for her first bday. My mom said we should probably wait on the play kitchen until she's a little older which is probably true. So far I have only one idea of what to get her - Leap Frog's Fridge Farm Magnetic Animal Set. I am open to any suggestions!

Nadia now says "mama!" She hasn't said it in a way that I am sure she is trying to say my name, but I have heard her say it when she's babbling away. I don't think we have an accurate idea of how large her receptive vocabulary is, but I've seen glimpses when I give her instructions. For example, she was holding my shoe (about to put it in her mouth), and I said "put down Mommy's shoe," and she did! If I ask her if she wants milk and she cries, I tell her "show me with your hand" and she'll then do the sign for milk with her left hand. If she's coming down "her" step in an unsafe manner and I say "use your hands," she immediately puts her hands down on the floor. I think she understands more words than we realize!

11 Months Old!

Today's photos were taken in her new dress that I bought yesterday for $1.50.

In honor of Nadia turning 11 months old today, I am going to list 11 of her likes and dislikes (I got the idea from Jill's post when River turned 8 months).

Likes:

1. Mommy - she definitely prefers to be with her Mommy as much as possible (Daddy says Mommy is the magnet) and although Daddy doesn't think he rates very high with Nadia, I am sure she also loves him very much

2. Shaking her head no - sometimes when she actually means "no" and many other times just because she thinks it's funny

3. Walking and climbing (as seen by the photo of her climbing her gym)

4. Being tickled or rough housed (flipping her upside down, swinging her, etc.)

5. Playing peekaboo - still a hit!

6. Sucking her thumb

7. Listening to music

8. Hearing meow - she likes animal sounds in general, but the cat's meow is still her favorite.

9. Being read to (especially touch and feel books or books with flaps)

10. Putting anything and everything in her mouth

11. Watching other people (especially other children)

Dislikes:

1. Having her diaper changed and/or getting dressed (for about the past month or so) - if I give her something she can hold in her hand then at least the diaper changes can occur without tears

2. Having her fingernails trimmed (for the last few months)

3. Stroller rides that exceed 20-30 minutes

4. Being put in her carseat (she's usually fine once we get going unless the ride is too long)

5. When a man she doesn't know comes too close or says something to her (she screams)

6. Drinking milk that's not really warm

7. Teething (has her top two and bottom two teeth)

8. Getting shots or blood drawn

9. Being told she has to sit while taking a bath (or anything else we tell her she can't do)

10. Eating warm food

11. Having a Kleenex or napkin come near her face - especially her nose

She's mastered so many skills in the past 11 months - holding her head, rolling over, sitting on her own, standing on her own, cruising, crawling, walking, turning off a light switch, feeding herself finger foods, cooing, babbling, saying "dada" to her Daddy, signing the word "milk," waving "bye," and much more!

Of course there are many more skills for her to master in the coming months - learning to say many more words, walking faster, running, using a sippy cup, feeding herself with a spoon, signing more words, learning to use the toilet, doing puzzles, and much more!

Next month will be the BIG day - her first birthday! I feel very bittersweet about it. It's exciting to watch her learn and grow, but I feel at times she's growing up WAY too fast!! I am soooo grateful to be her Mommy!!!!

Good Eater

I am grateful that thus far Nadia is a good eater. In the past 3 months I can only think of 2 foods she's not liked - the breadsticks at Olive Garden and a slice of lime (wish we had a photo of the expression on her face when she tasted my garnish once in Antigua). She eats green beans with the same vigor that she eats a treat (such as yesterday Mommy shared a little ice cream with her from Dairy Queen at the mall). At least for Nadia it didn't matter that I introduced fruits to her first, she eats peas, green beans, carrots, and corn without any hesitation. Today she wanted me to share my corn on the cob with her. One needs more than 4 teeth to eat corn on the cob! :-)

Speaking of eating, I had NO idea how many worms baby birds eat in a day until recently! A robin built a nest in a bush right by our back porch, and the robin seems to be delivering worms to the babies non-stop!

Paul had a first this week. On Thursday night he gave Nadia a bath all by himself while I was at work. Way to go, Paul!!!

Waving!

Yesterday I took several short videos of Nadia walking, and I uploaded two of them to youtube. The first one is 35 seconds long and shows her walking toward a banana on our back porch. The second one is 73 seconds long and shows her in the grass. She does more standing than walking in that one as there were many distractions (birds chirping, train going by, etc.), but in that one you can see some excitement and smiles which you can't in the first one. When I stopped recording (the 2nd one), I thought she was going down, but actually she popped back up and kept on walking.

Another new skill she's finally learned this week is waving hi/bye. We have worked on this for MONTHS. She mastered more difficult skills such as turning off a light switch months before she starting waving. While we were on vacation we told some people (who were expecting her to wave) that she did a 2 hand wave, but actually her 2 hand wave (like in the grass video) is her way of showing excitement. Yesterday and today she used just ONE hand to wave to Daddy (such as when he left for work this morning). Yahoo! Now if we can get her to clap - something else we've worked on for MONTHS.

She's really good at using the sign for milk now. She came up to me this morning showing me the sign, and I went and got her another couple of ounces of milk. She usually does the sign with her left hand while she's drinking a bottle. She also finds other ways to communicate with us. A few times she's gotten a book and brought it to Paul or I, and of course we have immediately read the book to her. Good job, Nadia! :-) I hope she'll start using more signs in the next few weeks and months as it would be most helpful!

The weather has been GORGEOUS the last few days. Paul and I have both taken her out to the swingset on more than one occasion, and Nadia & I have spent a fair amount of time on the back porch. I plan to take her out again today as the weather is supposed to continue to be gorgeous (80's) the next few days!

These feet were made for walking!

This is a picture of the boat "Adventure Antigua" that Paul & I were on.

We climbed on top of this limestone structure.

A view from the top of one of our hikes on Friday.

A fancy resort we passed by on a small island near Antigua.

Two of the many. many seagulls we saw on our trip.

It seems tricky to know when to declare a child is walking. She took her first steps (without holding on to anything) one week after she turned 9 months old. Since then there has been a gradual increase in how many times a day she did this as well as how many steps she would take in a row. Lately she's been walking if it's a short distance and crawling if it's a long one. Well yesterday was the first day that she definitely walked much more than she crawled. At the doctor's office (before I had my blood drawn) I let her out of her stroller in the middle of the room fully expecting she'd make a bee line for the row of chairs so she could cruise. Nope! She just walked all around the waiting room without holding on to anything. Way to go, Nadia! She still walks slowly if she's walking on her own, but the last few days if we give each hand a finger to hold on to while she's walking, she doesn't walk - she RUNS! I am sure her speed when walking alone will continue to increase as well. She's also REALLY into climbing these days. I bought a gate for the bottom of our stairs yesterday. She will climb up onto anything and everything that will help her get to higher places. I plan to post a video of her walking today or tomorrow.

Yesterday the nurse said I could come in next Tues, Thurs, or Fri for my first u/s. Of course I picked the first day possible as I am anxious to know how many babies we're expecting! I was thinking later though that one advantage to picking one of the other days is that it's probably not as guaranteed that we'll be able to see heartbeats at 5w6d. I think the hCG needs to be 10,000 per baby. So if I only have one baby then we'll definitely see the heartbeat, but I'm not sure if it's twins. I guess if the doubling time stays around 48 hours we should be fine as that would put me around 20,000 on Tuesday which is about what it would need to be to see 2 hearts beating away. The reason I care is because seeing a h/b is the prerequisite for being able to switch to another form of P4 (other than PIO shots). If per chance we don't see a h/b, I hope we don't have to wait 2 weeks for the next u/s (which is usually how frequent they are at this stage). I'm praying we'll see at least one h/b on Tues so Mon can be my last day of shots. :-)

Paul will be coming home by 3:30 today so that he can watch Nadia while I head to work. He said at least this last time (Tues) she didn't cry when he took her away from Sarah. Poor guy thinks she likes Sarah more than him. We were very pleased to find out that Sarah is just charging us $2.50/hr for babysitting. Wow! We can definitely afford that! That means we'll be paying $5 a week for the first 6 weeks and then $15 a week for the next 6 weeks and also for the fall semester. I have no idea what I'm going to do as far as work goes for next spring, but we have a little time to figure that out. :-)

If you'd like to hear my 27 month old nephew (Adam) sing "Take me out to the ballgame," click here for the 45 second video. Enjoy! :-)

Repeat Beta = 2,500!

I've had my bloodwork done at my primary care doctor's office this week. The advantage is I save 35 minutes of driving time (round trip). The disadvantage is I have to wait 3-4 hours longer to get "the call" since they don't process the labs as quickly. Anyhow I was very happy with my result of "a little over 2,500" which means a doubling time of 38 hours. WOOHOO! I compared my first Beta results to the median reported on the betabase website. At 19dpo the singleton median is 598, twins is 1167, and triplets is 1714. So mine was closest to the median for twins. At 21dpo (what I am today), the singleton median is 1228, twins is 2514, and triplets is 3550. So I am still thinking twins. :-)

I can't wait for my u/s (scheduled for 8:00am on Tuesday) for two reasons. #1 I am of course very curious as to how many babies are growing in my womb, and #2 I am very ready to be done with the PIO shots. I get to switch to a different form of progesterone once we see a heartbeat. This cycle I had 42 belly shots, and tonight will be butt shot #20. My hips are getting very sore. Of course I am glad to still be on the shots (they would have stopped if the Beta on Monday had been negative), but I will be glad to switch to something that doesn't involve a large needle every night. Monday night Paul accidently hit a vein and the blood shot out of me so much that it even landed on his leg and of course was running down mine as well. Yuck.

I think I'll lick the bottom of this shoe. Sand is yummy!

A view from one of the restaurants where we had dinner near our resort.


This was taken on our walk from the resort to the restaurants near the dock.

Paul and I climbed to the top of this limestone structure on our day trip.

Nadia's Wish List

I want to work on Nadia's wish list since her birthday will soon be only one month away. She's pretty well set in terms of clothing with the exception that she could use a few more pairs of summer pjs. I am looking for ideas in terms of toys for ages 12-18 months old (since she'll turn 18 months old on Christas Eve). The ideas I have had thus far are a Little People Animal Sounds Farm and a play kitchen. Anyone have a specific play kitchen that you would recommend? I haven't done any research on them. Any other ideas of toys she might like? Of course I realize that it doesn't take much at all to amuse a little one. We learned that in Antigua. I didn't pack too many toys (just a few very small ones), but we got creative and washed out empty yogurt containers, water bottles, and such like that while we were there. She had a lot of fun with these "toys."

I know that there is a wide variation in hCG levels in part because there is a variation as to when implantation occurs. The nurse said to me today that I should be comparing today's hCG level to my first one in 2007 (which was 187) not my 2nd one which I was comparing yesterday's to (395). However the first one last time was at 11dp6dt which was 2 days sooner. The nurse said to me that my result today was "very high" and later said it was a number more typical of multiples. However, Jo's experience shows it's possible to have a number that sounds like more than one and really only have one. I need to keep reminding myself that God is in control, and whatever number of hearts we see on the u/s is His best for us (whether that's one, two, or three). I don't want to be disappointed if we only see one or terrified if we see three. I am hoping for twins, but I will be thrilled to just have one more baby.


I can see that my days of eating chocolate are coming to a temporary end again in the very near future. I've had nausea off and on the past several days but not any heartburn except after eating chocolate. I made brownies today, but I don't think I'll be making any for quite a few more months. I am trying to decide if I am going to give up my light yogurts again or not. I did last time because of the artificial sweeteners. Anyone have any opinion on this? I don't drink diet sodas (or any soda for that matter) so usually the only time I injest artificial sweeteners are when I chew gum or eat a yogurt. Last time I took it REALLY easy during the first trimester in terms of how much walking I did, stairs I climbed, how much I lifted, etc. and then I took it easy again during the placenta previa time period. I haven't been taking it easy thus far although I let Paul mow the lawn. I am lifting a 20 lb girl many times a day as one example. Any thoughts on this???


It has been hard to come back to chilly temps. Thankfully it's supposed to get a lot warmer in the next couple of days. The temps in Antigua were GORGEOUS! The lows were about 75 degrees each day, and the highs were about 83 degrees each day. Tuesday was the only day we had significant rain. The other days it would just sprinkle for a few minutes maybe once or twice a day. In terms of wildlife, it was very surprising not to see large iguanas and such. We only saw very tiny ones. We did see many pelicans, cattle egret, sea gulls, mongoose, etc.

Let me identify the pictures in this post. The first photo shows that Nadia fell asleep on her Pop Pop's shoulders while he was walking her around the resort one afternoon.


The second photo was taken at Nelson's Dockyard.


The third is of one of the swimming pools at our resort. Nadia loved the fountains as she could stand or sit on the pedestals (the water was only a couple of inches deep on top of them).


The fourth is of Nadia walking around Pop Pop's beach chair. That girl loves to walk! The most steps we saw her take in our suite (without holding on to anything) was eight. If it's a short distance between two objects she can hold onto while standing, she typically walks the distance between them these days. She only crawls when she'd have to walk a long way without holding on to anything. She also managed to climb up onto the beach chair by herself one time. She also loves to climb!


The fifth one Paul took early one morning when he was taking Nadia for a walk on the beach at our resort.

The sixth one shows several pelicans on an island (photo taken on our boat tour on Friday).


The seventh one was also taken on our trip on Friday.

I'll be dropping Nadia off at Sarah's at 3:30 this afternoon on my way to school. I have office hours and then teach from 5:00-8:00pm. I'll get home about 8:45pm. Paul will pick Nadia up at Sarah's at 5:30 on his way home from school. She's going to Sarah's on Tuesdays, and Paul is coming home by 3:30 on Thursdays.

P.S. For singleton pregnancies, at 19 DPO (which I was yesterday), the average HCG level is 303 mIU/ml, with a typical range of 111-514 mIU/ml. So you can see that although there is no guarantee I'll have more than one baby, it does seem rather likely. :-) I also realize my number might not be doubled tomorrow as the higher the numbers go, the longer it takes for them to double.
For HCG levels <1200 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is 48-72 hours.
For HCG levels 1200 to 6000 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is 72-96 hours.
For HCG levels >6000 mIU/ml, the expected doubling time is >96 hours.

Beta Results!

My hCG today was 1,033 compared to 395 on this day with Nadia. I think those of you who selected twins on the poll were correct! I'll have another Beta on Wednesday and then my first ultrasound next week. Paul is in shock. I am thrilled. I always wanted to have at least 3 children, and for awhile there I began to lose hope I'd ever have any. Then I thought Nadia might be our one and only. I am so excited to think we might have 3 children after all although our hands will be full to have 3 under the age of 18 months! I can't wait for the ultrasound next week when we will find out for sure if I'm carrying one, two, or three babies. I am definitely pregnant! PTL!!! YAHOO! :-) Here are the hpt pics. I didn't do one today, and I don't plan to use the last three.

Vacation in Review

I haven't gone through all the photos yet. I will keep posting some of the best ones over the next few days. I have deleted a few, but I still have about 150 to go through - some taken with the underwater camera and some with my regular camera.

May 8 - We left our house at about 6:50pm, but at about 7:15 Paul remembered we had forgotten to bring the pack n' play with us which Nadia was going to sleep in that night at Paul's parents. So we drove back home and therefore arrived at Paul's parents an hour later than we had planned to arrive. I went straight to bed as I knew we'd be getting up very early the next morning. Unfortunately it took awhile to get Nadia back to sleep and then she woke up at midnight and 3:30am. Since she was sleeping in the same room we were, we didn't opt to let her cry. So we didn't get much sleep that night. We had planned to get up at 4am, but since Nadia got up at 3:30 - so did Paul & I.

May 9 -We pulled out of their driveway at 4:15am. We somehow managed to get 4 suitcases into the trunk of my Corolla. We arrived at Newark airport at 6:30am and parked in the economy lot (which is still rather expensive - $15 a day!). After taking the shuttle to the terminal, we checked in and went through security and then had breakfast. Our flight landed in Antigua a little early as we had tailwinds on our way down. The process of going through customs and immigration was TERRIBLE. It took us 1 hour and 45 minutes! Usually when we land on an island in the Caribbean we are in the taxi headed to the hotel in less than 30 minutes (sometimes less than 15). After we checked into the resort, we headed to the pool. Nadia loved it! After that we went to a large grocery store which was about a 5 minute walk from our resort. We bought prepared food for dinner (they sold subs, pizza, burgers, roti, fried chicken, etc.) as well as groceries for snacks and breakfast for the week (soda, milk, OJ, cereal, bagels, yogurt, etc.). Every day we ate breakfast and lunch in our suite and went out for dinner.

Our suite was really nice. It had a fully stocked kitchen (blender, microwave, toaster oven, oven, refrigerator, dishes, utensils, waffle maker, etc.), living room, patio, laundry room, two full bathrooms, and two bedrooms. We put the crib in the laundry room so that became Nadia's bedroom (and we also did a few loads of laundry there as well). Our only complaint with the suite was that there were many mosquitoes that bit Paul & I in there. Paul's parents didn't get many bites, and Nadia thankfully only had 3 (all on one hand). Paul is allergic so his bites looked worse than mine although I still had many bites especially on my legs.

May 10 - We stayed at the resort all day. We spent some time at the beach in the morning (after Nadia's first nap) and in the pool in the afternoon (after her second nap). We ate at the Castaway's beach bar for dinner which was just a couple minute walk from our suite. I was pretty wiped out this whole day as Nadia didn't sleep well the first night we were in Antigua. She didn't get to sleep until 8:30 (very late for her) and then she woke up at 4:30 (very early). I definitely was aware of the fact that I was a mother on this Mother's Day as I would never get up at 4:30am on vacation otherwise!!! The latest she slept in was 6am (May 11). From May 12-16 she woke up every day between 5:05-5:35. We got into a routine that I would get up with her and feed her and play with her for about one hour, and then I'd go back to bed and Paul would take her for a walk outside in her stroller and play with her until it was time for me to put her down for her first nap.

May 11 - After Nadia's first nap we took the public bus into St. Johns (the capital). It only cost a little more than $1 per person. We toured a cathedral (see photo at left) and a museum on the history of Antigua & Barbuda, did some shopping, and had lunch before heading back. Nadia slept in her stroller while we ate lunch.


May 12 - We had planned to stay at the resort this day, but due to the heavy rains, we decided to rearrange our schedule and head to Nelson's Dockyard instead. This proved to be a wise decision. We were going to take the taxi there until we found out it was $40 one way. So we took the bus back to St. Johns and then took another bus to the dockyard. After touring the dockyard, Paul & his dad walked to a nearby fort. Then we all took a taxi up to Shirley Heights. We were planning to take the buses back, but at that point we decided to "splurge" and take the taxi back instead. We had dinner at Castaway's after spending some time in the pool.


May 13 - We spent the day at the resort and had dinner at the Dogwatch Restaurant on a dock about 5 minutes from our resort to celebrate Paul's parents 42nd anniversary. :-)


May 14 - Paul & I were supposed to go on a day trip to Barbuda, but they called us the night before to say the trip was cancelled. We all spent the day at the resort and had dinner at a steakhouse about a 5 minute walk from our resort. This was our favorite meal. Paul and his mom had steak, and Paul's dad had swordfish. Paul's mom and I took home doggy bags as the portions were huge.


May 15 - Paul & I went on an Eco Tour that made a few stops - some involved hiking and others snorkeling. I have to say the water at Antigua isn't nearly as clear as all the other islands we've been to (although it's still much clearer than say in New Jersey!). The snorkeling wasn't that great either. It was a nice vacation, but it definitely wasn't our favorite island. Our three favorites so far have been St. Lucia (we want to go back some day), the British Virgin Islands (we did Tortola and Virgin Gorda), and St. Kitts. Our other favorite Caribbean location is Mexico where we also want to return some day (not right now though with the swine flu!). The underwater camera works very well though so I look forward to using it again some day! It was great to spend the day with my hubby although we often would be talking about what we thought Nadia was probably doing at that particular time. We picked up dinner at the grocery store (Epicurean) before heading back to the suite and were very pleased to hear that Nadia had been a very good little girl for her grandparents - even took 3 naps for them! One other thing we really enjoyed at the grocery store was the bakery. The croissants and cookies and other pastries were very inexpensive and very tasty. The strawberry shortcake cookies were one of my favorites. :-) We played our 3rd game of Pinochle after Nadia went to bed, and it was the first one Paul & I won that week.



May 16 - We had planned to take one more trip to the pool or beach in the morning, but we ended up just spending the time in our suite before heading to lunch at 11am and the reception area at noon where we were to meet the taxi taking us back to the airport ($24 - much more reasonable). The airport was again a rather zany place in terms of checking in. They opened EVERY suitcase and went through things very carefully by hand, but eventually we made it to our gate. Unfortunately we sat in the plane on the runway for well over an hour and we had headwinds so I was very tired by the time we landed in Newark as Nadia spent most of the 6 hours squirming in my lap. After going through immigration and customs, Paul gave me my shot and then we took the shuttle back to our car. The driving conditions were NOT good (heavy rain much of the way and dense fog at other times) so it took longer to get home. We first dropped Paul's parents off at their home, and then we finally arrived at our home about 2am. Thankfully Nadia didn't wake up until 6:45 am although that still felt very early as I had only slept 4 1/2 hours! She made up for some of her lost sleep last night as she fell asleep in my arms at 5:30pm and didn't wake up until 6:25am. She slept 13 hours!! Usually the longest she'll sleep is 11 hours. I feel much better today. Yesterday I was exhausted and lightheaded most of the day. Overall, it was a great trip!

Mother's Day Blessings

I didn't go on the computer at all on Saturday or Sunday (Mother's Day) so I am doing a belated Mother's Day post in the form of a list of some of my favorite moments as a mom as well as a few other things I'm grateful for that have nothing to do with motherhood. :-) I am thankful...

1. For my mom - as we were growing up, we children were a very, very high priority in her life. She drove us to and from school, listened while we practiced our instruments, etc. We are still a very high priority in her life. Now that I have a cell phone (same company as her) we talk rather frequently on the phone which I enjoy. Whenever I have a concert or do special music, I miss seeing her in the congregation when she's not able to come (she still comes when possible). I am thankful that she and my dad will be celebrating their 40th anniversary this year.

2. For Paul's mom - I knew it was quite an honor when Paul told me (when dating) that I was one of his four favorite women. I knew the other 3 were his mom, Nan (mom's mom), and Aunt Debbie (mom's sister). Grandma loves our little Nadia very much which of course means a lot to me! They celebrated their 42nd anniversary this past Wednesday while we were in Antigua.

3. For Nadia - I had my first Mother's Day with a baby in my arms last Sunday!!!

4. That we were able to go to Antigua - It was great to spend a week in the Caribbean with Nadia, Paul, and Paul's parents.

5. For the little one (or ones) growing inside me!! It was the best Mother's Day gift possible to get a BFP the day after. I have done one hpt the past 7 days, but I think today will be the last as I don't think the test line can get any darker. I have 3 hpts left, but maybe I'll give them to whomever I give my unopened vial of Follistim (anyone know someone who would have to pay for it themselves and could use it?). Yes, Lucia it's finally sinking in that I am pregnant, LOL! Since we ttc for 5 1/2 years before we found out Nadia was growing in my womb, I think I am in shock that it happened so quickly this time around. Of course we did go straight to ivf which we didn't try until we'd ttc over 5 years the first time around. I am so very thankful. I was told my odds were 25% since I am 37 years old, but it seems we've been given at least one more miracle. YAY!!!

6. For my hubby - I am very proud of how well he's done in his doctoral program at PSU this year. In the fall semester he had a 4.0. He didn't get a 4.0 this semester, but his lowest grade was an A- which I still think is impressive considering he has taken really hard classes like Quantum Mechanics 2. In all his years as a student (from bachelor's to the present) the lowest grade he's gotten in a chemistry class is an A-. Way to go, Paul!

7. For my brother's recent accomplishment (see photo) - Yesterday Maurice graduated from Capital Bible Seminary (in MD) with a graduate degree (Master of Divinity). He is going to candidate school with a mission board in Philadelphia next month and hopes to serve as a counselor (what his degree was in) in Ireland. We'd like to go visit him some day over there as we haven't been to Ireland yet. :-)

8. For my newest niece - Rachel will be 2 weeks old tomorrow. Most of the photos in this post are of her. I can't wait to meet her and also meet my nephew (Nathan) who will be 6 months old next Sunday. I should meet him in late July.

9. For the wonderful feeling of Nadia sleeping in my arms or on my shoulder and for the other moments when she cuddles with me such as when I rock her before her naps and bedtime.

10. That I'm Nadia's very favorite person. Of course I want her to love her Daddy, grandparents, etc very much, but it is a wonderful feeling to be viewed as the most special person in her life. :-)

11. That I was able to nurse Nadia for 7 months. What a wonderful experience (not at first but eventually it was!)...

12. For Nadia's smiles and laughter - they are priceless!!!

13. For the joy we experience watching Nadia learn and grow.

14. For the 3 weeks I've had off of work. I start teaching again this week (Tuesday night).

15. That the Lord was in control of how many embryos we needed. I have been praying for months about that. I kept praying that we wouldn't do ivf and end up with zero children, and I also had been praying that we wouldn't have triplets plus have a lot of frozen embryos. I was sad when I found out we didn't have any others that made it to blastocyst by day 6, but now I realize the Lord knew we didn't need any frozen ones this time because He enabled us to get a BFP from the fresh transfer. I am very glad we don't need to think about things like giving up a frozen embryo through adoption. Whew... I am dying of curiosity though as to how many little ones have implanted and are still growing!! With my first pgcy my first u/s was at 5w0d (which I'll be on Wednesday), but my 2nd (Nadia) it wasn't until my 6th week (can't remember exactly which day). Hopefully my first u/s will be next week. That also will mean the end of shots for me although of course I am very glad to continue them as long as our baby or babies need them!!

16. For the date Paul and I had on Friday (almost 8 hours long!). Although it wasn't the type of setting where we had much time for private conversation (we were on a boat with about 25 other people), it was great to have all that time for just the two of us. :-)