Pinterest

Although I've enjoyed Facebook for a few years, I've not been tempted to join Twitter, Google +, LinkedIn, etc. I held off for awhile on Pinterest, but I finally decided to check it out. I really like it, and it doesn't consume too much of my time (which was my concern since FB can easily do that). I've gotten ideas for recipes to try, crafts to make with the kids (like the Thanksgiving cards Nadia made last week), photography tips, etc. I had repinned (saved) a photography idea that I thought was cute. I didn't tell Paul about it, and he put the colored lights on the tree before I had a chance to take the picture on Friday. Today I gave the pose a try with some white lights. I thought some of them turned out well. I was bummed when Paul said he didn't like any of them. I guess it's a good reminder that taste plays a large role in determining what photos we like and don't like. It's very subjective. I can't assume just because I like a particular picture that Paul (or anyone else) will like it. We all have different tastes and preferences! I know Paul doesn't like the blurry effect, black and white, sepia, etc. for example.

Today something very rare occured in our house. Both children were asleep at the same time in the middle of the day! Nadia didn't nap the last two days, and thus far she's never missed her nap three days in a row, so I figured she'd sleep today, and she did. What I wasn't expecting was for Ian to take a longer than usual nap. I was expecting him to wake up at 1:05 (30 minutes after I put him down), but he slept until 1:30! He slept for 55 minutes!!! He woke up in a MUCH better mood than he does when he takes a short nap. Another thing that was very unusual about today was that it was in the high 60's. Wow! What beautiful weather considering it will be December in 3 days! Ian and I enjoyed walking around outside during Nadia's ballet class. Finally, we actually made use of the street sweeper for the first time. I had a feeling they might be coming today. We raked our leaves yesterday afternoon, and they were sucked up into the truck today. Awesome!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Yesterday it was warm enough to enjoy a walk to the park. I'm planning on taking the kids outside this afternoon also. We have to take advantage of the warmer than usual temps! Nadia had been getting back into a routine of taking a nap every afternoon. In fact, I had to wake her up on Thanksgiving so that she could join us for our turkey dinner (around 2:30pm). Yesterday she didn't take a nap, and what this meant was that she fell asleep much more quickly last night than she does on the days she takes a nap. My guess is that she gets about the same amount of sleep either way. Either she stays awake in her bed during "nap time" and goes to sleep fairly quickly at bedtime, or she takes a nap and then plays in her bed for a long time before she falls asleep at bedtime.

 I was very pleased when I weighed Ian yesterday as he weighed over 26 lbs! I was stunned as he was under 25 lbs the last time I weighed him. He gained 1.5 lbs in 8 days. Wow! Karen (OT) said he needed to take 30 bites per meal. That is making a difference!

The Story of Jonah

Nadia reciting the story of Jonah from memory (pages 260-264 of The Beginner's Bible by Zonderkidz).

Red and Green Friday

I love bargains, but I'm not a Black Friday shopper. First, I value my sleep more than finding a good deal, and second, I'm not a fan of shopping with large crowds of people. I did go to one store today - CVS. If you have a CVS near you, I really recommend you going there around Thanksgiving. They run their "Black Friday" deals for three days (beginning on Thanksgiving Day). They give LOTS of stuff away for free (after Extra Care Bucks), and if you have manufacturer coupons, you can actually "make money" on some items (like I made $2 on Colgate today). Aside from the plethora of freebies, the other nice thing about CVS is that if they are out of anything, they'll give you a rain check that never expires. How nice is that! I was pleasantly surprised how many of their "freebies" were still in stock since I arrived more than 24 hours after the sale began.

I did do some online "Black Friday" shopping. That's definitely more my style although sometimes it's hard to be online at exactly the right moment when the deals (such as Amazon's lightning deals) sometimes only last for say 2 minutes. I'm thankful for some bloggers (such as Money Saving Mom) who point out some of the great deals as otherwise it could be like looking for a needle in a haystack at time. Barnes and Noble was having a sale where you could get one toy or game for 50% off today. Well that ended up taking a lot more time than I anticipated because many of the toys I first selected (ex. Legos) weren't included. Finally I found something I've been wanting for the kids (a play cash register) that WAS included in the sale. Whew.

Instead of calling it Black Friday, it's more like a red and green Friday in our house because we start decorating for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving. Nadia didn't last too long with helping me put ornaments on the tree. That surprised me. She was very excited at first. All the ornaments she put up were bunched very close together. Maybe part of the reason she lost enthusiasm for the activity was because Ian was taking them off at the same time she was putting them on. She can put them on properly this year. Last year she just rested them in the branches. She took them on and off a fair amount last year (at age 2.5), but Ian also started taking off the lights. OOPS! Hopefully he now realizes that is not acceptable. I don't mind if he takes off the ornaments near the bottom, as I put all the fragile ones out of their reach. We've never had a tree topple over, but it might happen this year with Ian. Hopefully not.

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My parents and brother spent 25 hours with us. Paul's family spent several hours here yesterday afternoon. Paul's mom brought coleslaw and corn pudding. Paul's sister-in-law brought an apple and a pumpkin pie. I served turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, a green bean casserole, homemade rolls, and cranberry sauce. Yesterday Nadia only had cranberry sauce and a roll. She loves cranberry sauce. Today I insisted she have some sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, and stuffing. She discovered she loves sweet potatoes (we tried to tell her that yesterday!). It was tough to get her to eat the mashed potatoes and stuffing. She loves pierogies (which have mashed potatoes on the inside), so I have no idea why she thinks she doesn't like mashed potatoes. I think everyone had a nice time. It was nice not to need to travel this holiday. Of course the downside of hosting is more dishes, cooking, and laundry, but it's all SOOOO worth it! I've always loved spending time with our families, but it means even more to me now as I love watching our parents interact with our kids. Priceless. Another upside of hosting the meals is that we have leftovers! Hopefully Ian will be joining us in eating some of the meal next year.

The highlight of my day today happened this evening during dinner. Ian has said "I love you" when I've prompted him to say it to someone else (ex. a Grandma), but today was the first time he said it to ME of his own accord. Priceless. I almost started crying. Definitely a heart melting moment. The funniest thing he said today was while we were decorating the tree he was playing nearby and said in a very stern voice "Ian, NO!" Paul and I burst out laughing. I have no idea why he told himself "no," but you can tell he's heard that a few times, lol!

41 Months Old

On Christmas Eve Nadia will turn 3 1/2 years old, and today on Thanksgiving she turns 41 months old. It seems like it's gone so quickly on the one hand, and yet on the other hand when I look at her baby pictures it's hard to remember when she was so tiny. I am certainly very, very, very thankful for this sweet little girl I have the awesome privilege of calling my daughter. Becoming a mom seemed like such an elusive thing for me for so many years that honestly there are still times I feel I need to pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming. Almost 3.5 years later I still can't get over the fact that my dream of becoming a mom has finally come true.
1. Nadia has made a lot of progress with her puzzle skills over the past month. She can now do small jigsaw puzzles on her own (12 pieces), and she's getting so she doesn't need too much help with slightly bigger ones (24 pieces).
2. Her Bible is still her favorite book by far. We read from it many times a day. In addition to the stories that have been her favorites for a long time (ex. Jonah), she has wanted us to read the following on a daily basis recently: Balaam, Mary (when she puts the perfume on Jesus' feet), Zaccheaus, Joseph (coat of many colors), Jesus with the children, and Moses (burning bush and the ten commandments in particular). Unfortunately one of her favorite Bible stories She can't wait to see Jonah at Sight and Sound in Lancaster in 7 months.

3. She loves to watch VeggieTales. When it comes to tv shows her current favorites are Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends, Max and Ruby, and Little Bear (all on Nick Jr. ). I've started having her watch WordWorld (PBS) to see if that will help her learn her letters.
4. Aside from the Bible, her favorite authors/books at the moment are Mercer Mayer, Eric Carle, The Giving Tree (Shel Silverstein), Dave Ramsey (Life Lessons with Junior series), Ludwig Bemelmans (Madeline), Robert Munsch, Jane O'Connor (Fancy Nancy), Rosemary Wells (Max and Ruby), and H.A. and Margaret Ray (Curious George).

5. She was on a kick for part of the last month of eating oatmeal for breakfast every day. For the longest time she had been eating cold cereal every morning.
6. She's had a couple of accidents lately after going many months without any. She has had them in the bathroom. She seems to wait just a tad too long sometimes to get herself to the bathroom. She goes on average three times a day. I don't know how she does it.
7. She likes to take Ian's hand and lead him around the house. He's not always a willing participant.

8. She learned in the past month how to put a clean pair of underwear on all by herself. She's been taking her dirty underwear off and putting it in the hamper for many months, but she just recently learned how to put them on herself. She still hasn't mastered putting on her own socks (although again she's been taking them off herself for months).
9. She's also getting more independent with putting on her own shoes, but sometimes she still needs help in knowing which shoe goes on which foot.

10. She still doesn't play independently very well when we're on the main floor of the house, but she is now playing by herself in her room for longer periods of time. Way to go, Nadia!

11. She's started asking me questions like "is there a baby in your belly, Mommy?" She has told me many times she wants a sister. I told her that if the Lord gives her a sister, we're going to call her Debbie. She said, "We'll call the baby Aunt Debbie?" It's very confusing to her that two people might have the same name. Just like she couldn't understand that the restaurant was called Wendy's. She thought for sure we were headed to Aunt Wendy's house. Once I asked her how many more babies she thought I should have, and she said three more. I asked if any should be brothers, and she said no she wants three sisters. Well it would be wonderful if the Lord gave her one sister, but I don't think at the age of 39 that I'll be having three more babies. Paul will have a stroke if the next round of ivf results in me carrying triplets! I will say it's exciting to think that maybe Nadia will get to share in the excitement of a pregnancy - feeling the baby kick, etc. She was too little to have any notion what was happening when I was pregnant with Ian. It would be totally different this time around if this next round of ivf results in a pregnancy.
12. She thinks about spiritual matters all throughout the day. For example while playing with Play-Doh she asked me to "make God" (out of Play-doh). I told her that was impossible. Then she asked me to make a Jesus out of Play-doh. I told her my skills are limited to things like snowmen, a cross, snakes, etc.. Daddy did make her Jonah and a whale once out of Play-doh.
13. She's starting to want to walk more than sit in the double strollers. Sometimes though she gets tired and just wants to ride in the stroller. Other times due to safety reasons I insist she rides.
14. She often says "I'm a mommy." When I ask her who her children are, she tells me Sweetpea and Larry. She tells me hold old each of them are, and their age always involes a half (ex. 4 1/2). When she goes to bed at night, she makes sure that Larry and Sweetpea each have their head on a small pillow and have a blanket on them. It's so cute!
15. She has her first imaginary friend. His name is Winston. I'm still trying to figure out where she heard that name, lol! One thing that her imaginary friend does is give her (imaginary) pieces of gum. Supposedly she's been to Winston's house. LOL! For the record, I've never let her have a piece of gum.
16. She wants to wear her Snow White costume All The Time along with a tiara. She says that she's "Queen Esther." It's fun to see her get into role playing (as either a mommy or Queen Esther). Sometimes she says "I'm a baby," but she just says that when she is about to suck her thumb.
17. She's become almost 100% independent with going to the bathroom. The only time she needs help is if she's wearing pants that have a snap and zipper in the front. She can't undo the snap herself.

18. Her favorite footed pjs have Disney princesses on them.

19. She's recently started hitting and shoving Ian. Thankfully she doesn't actually hurt him, but I'm working on teaching her that hitting and shoving are unacceptable.

20. She always used to eat breakfast within a few minutes of waking up. Now she likes to play for awhile before eating. This is possible on days we don't have a morning commitment (like gymnastics).

21. If she's not happy with me (particularly after I've doled out some sort of negative consquence), she sometimes "hisses" at me. It's so hard not to laugh. She does it as if it's some how hurting me. I then talk with her about how hissing at someone is unacceptable, but inside I'm laughing as she looks so funny when she hisses with this scowl on her face. If looks could kill....

In honor of Thanksgiving, I'm going to conclude my list with 20 things I am thankful for about Nadia.

22. Her smile (love those dimples!)

23. Her bear hugs

24. Her laughter
25. Her friendliness
26. Her love of books

27. Her love of the Bible

28. Her love of church

29. Her love of Cubbies (AWANA)

30. Her love of chocolate

31. Her love of amusement park rides, especially roller coasters

32. Her love of music

33. Her words of affirmation (such as "You're the best Mommy ever")

34. Her love of ice cream

35. Her incredible auditory memory - she can memorize what she hears very quickly

36. Her love of her grandparents, cousins, etc.

37. Her love of being tickled

38. The good reports I always get about her from her Sunday School and Children's Church teachers

39. Generally, she wants to please me

40. Her desire to help me

41. Her prayers and how she thanks God for things like curtains (which I've never mentioned in a prayer)

20 Things I love about Ian

I am including 20 things I love about Nadia in her post tomorrow. I thought on Thanksgiving Eve I'd focus on my son. I have definitely had far more frustration and stress related to Ian (sleeping issues, feeding issues, diapering issues, etc.) than I ever have had in regards to Nadia, but that doesn't mean I'm not immensely grateful for my sweet boy. I love him to pieces and am so, so grateful for the privilege of being his mom. Thank you, Lord, for giving me Ian Alexander!!!

1. His smile - it can light up a room!

2. His contagious laughter

3. His love of being tickled

4. His love of books - Nowadays he says "you read" and then turns around and sits in my lap so that I can read a book to him. His attention span isn't that great, but I'm sure it will expand in time.

5. His bright mind - today in the bathtub he picked up two foam "O's" and said "O." Yes, at 23 months old Ian knows more letters of the alphabet than Nadia does at 40 months. He's also doing really well with learning his shapes and colors.

6. His love of music. Of the four of us, Ian breaks into song the most. I love to hear him sing!

7. His ability to play independently for long periods of time (ex. with matchbox cars)

8. His sweet voice - I love this stage of development. Nothing could sound sweeter to me than hearing a child this age talking. Some of the words I find the most endearing are "thank you" (which he often follows by also saying "you welcome"), "Mommy" (he very recently started saying that on a regular basis), and "okay."

9. His sense of humor (ex. saying he's a girl, when he knows he's a boy)

10. How he loves to snuggle, hug, and cuddle many times a day

11. His zest for life (we just have to channel the energy in appropriate ways)

12. How he helps with cleaning up and says the rhyme "clean up, clean up, everybody do their share" while he's picking toys up

13. How he adores his sister and wants to play with her (although he has a lot to learn when it comes to sharing)

14. He sleeps through the night (11 hours on average). We have a long way to go with the nap (20 minutes today).

15. How attached he is to me. Yes, this can be frustrating at times, but it is also endearing.

16. How flexible he has been regarding what type of "milk" we have given him (whole milk, Elecare, almond milk, and rice drink)

17. How he loves to talk on the phone to his two grandmas

18. He's usually very good about sitting in a stroller or a carseat

19. His love of animals - it's so fun to watch him be SO excited at zoos

20. His excellent memory  - he has memorized the words to many songs and books

Our Little Parrot

Ian has reached the stage where he will parrot back just about anything you ask him to say. That's not what I was doing with him in these videos. The first two I took today to show his pronunciation of a few foods, animals, and vehicles, and the third vidoe (shapes) was from last week. Today some of the other moms were having fun during Nadia's ballet class with getting him to attempt some rather difficult words like "hippopotamus." I have to say he did a pretty good job! His pronunciation still could use some improvement with many words, but there are a growing number of words he says 100% correctly now. For a long time he said "bo" for boat, but he now ends the word with the "t" sound, as one example. I wanted to capture a couple of videos so that in the future I can go back and hear his sweet voice. I love kids' voices at this stage. So adorable! It's a shame they grow out of this stage so quickly.

Nadia woke up earlier this morning (6:30), and she had trouble falling asleep this evening. She did however take a nap this afternoon. She fell asleep almost immediately at naptime, and she slept a little more than 2 hours. I have to say I'm relieved that her afternoon nap hasn't totally disappeared yet. Ian could take a lesson from her. He only napped for 20 minutes yesterday and today. He's not as prone to falling asleep in the car, which means I don't need to use the DVD player as much in the car. He's truly only taking one nap a day these days.

Giving Thanks

1. I'm thankful Paul and I were able to go on a date last night. We had dinner at TGIFridays, and our bill for 2 entrees and 1 soda (I always just get water) was $4.54. COUPONS! I gave the waitress a $3 tip so our total cost for the meal was $7.54. Fridays has been my favorite place lately. The only bummer was I didn't get the meal special, which includes a dessert. You can get an entree plus either a dessert or appetizer for $10, or for $12.99 you get all three. I usually go the $12.99 route, and Paul and I share the appetizer. The dessert is all mine (Paul wouldn't want it anyhow). Their peanut butter pie is divine! Friendly's and Fridays are my two favorite restaurants right now because of the nice meal deals that include dessert. I have a sweet tooth, but I very rarely order dessert at a restaurant because it usually costs over $5. When it's included in a $10 meal, I'm in! Fridays is also having a deal where if you go 4 times within a few months then they'll give you a $20 credit. So our $4 charge brought us closer to earning that $20 credit. Sweet! I should add that whenever we go out to eat, we always use gift cards that we've either received as Christmas/birthday gifts from our relatives OR that we've gotten through "thank you points" earned through our credit cards. So actually the dinner was free, but I'm all for stretching the gift cards as much as possible!

2. We also were able to do some shopping with some other coupons last night. I had $7 off a $12 purchase coupon for Hallmark, $5 off a $15 purchase at Bed Bath and Beyond, etc. We did some Christmas shopping for others and also did a little shopping for our home at Lowe's as the electrician and plumber each left some holes in our drywall earlier this year.

3. I'm grateful my hubby can do things like repair drywall. That's definitely out of my comfort zone.

4. I'm thankful that I'm still learning new ways to save money. For years I've searched for coupon codes when ordering online, but it was only in 2010 that I learned about sites like Ebates and Shopathome. I have to admit sometimes I still forget to start at those sites if I'm shopping online, but most of the time I now remember, and it's such an easy way to save money. Usually the rebate is not very large, but I just made some purchases through Snapfish (via Shopathome), and the rebate was 24%. That's terrific especially as I was already using a coupon code for 35% off plus free shipping. The newest strategy I've begun to use is to buy gift cards from sites like Giftcardgranny.com. I bought a JCP gift card there with a 15% discount, and of course I'll be using coupons and such when I shop at JCP with that gift card (usually I use JCPs $10 off $25 coupons to shop off their clearance racks). I've also enjoyed using Swagbucks. I joined about 15 months ago, and in that span I've earned almost $85 worth of gift cards from Amazon just by using Swagbucks as my search engine.

5. I'm looking forward to hosting Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday for Paul's parents, brother, sister-in-law, nephew, and grandmother as well as my parents and brother. It will be great to have 13 people gathered around our table. That's one of my favorite aspects of holidays - time spent with our extended family!

6. I picked up our turkey this afternoon. I got it for free (coupons!). I'm glad I didn't wait any later to get one as there were hardly any left!

7. I love my new camera.  I'm looking forward to improving my skills in the weeks and months and years to come!

8. I got a good report on Ian today from both Sarah (Sunday School) and the ladies who were in the nursery during the worship service! All of them talked about how nicely he played and how many words he said. Way to go, Ian!

9. This morning at breakfast he looked down at my skirt and said "square" and "diamond." He correctly identified the geometric shapes on my skirt! He's doing really well with learning colors, shapes, and identifying about 5 letters of the alphabet. In terms of counting, he counts by odd numbers 1, 3, 5. Now to work on filling in the ones he's skipping. :-)

10. We set a record this morning in that BOTH kids slept until 7:45am!! I was able to get up after 7am and still get dressed and such before they woke up. Considering it's been 2 weeks since Nadia slept past 6:30am, it felt like a miracle! Ian woke up first, and it was his crying while I got him dressed that woke Nadia up. I don't expect that to become the norm, but it was a really nice treat this morning.

11. Nadia didn't sleep at all during the 2 hours she spent in her bed this afternoon. I didn't take any efforts to encourage her to get to sleep during that time span. If she doesn't nap tomorrow, it will be the first time ever that she missed a nap three days in a row. I do think the lack of a nap is the reason that she slept in this morning and the reason that she went to bed very easily tonight. Frankly, if it means she'll fall asleep quickly, I'd prefer a quiet time over an afternoon nap. We shall see. It was really nice though to have bedtime be very easy for both kids tonight for Paul while I was at a community Thanksgiving service.

12. Quite a few people have been asking me lately how Ian is doing with eating. This means a lot to me. What touches me even more is when people tell me they're praying about it. What really blew me away was when a husband and wife that sing in our church choir told me that they include Ian in their prayers at every meal every day. Wow. They said that since they're about to eat it reminds them of his struggles with eating. That was so touching. I stopped to think whom could I pray for that fervently, and I picked my friend, Jo. I've been praying a lot about our upcoming ivf cycle. I decided that every time I pray for our cycle (many times a day), I am also going to pray for my friend, Jo. Jo has a 4 year old son (from ivf). Jo tried ivf #2 at the same time we were trying ivf #2 (about 2.5 years ago). Unfortunately her cycle got cancelled before she reached the egg retrieval. Right now they are praying for the Lord to provide the $$ they need to pay for another cycle. I'm mentioning it here in case any of you feel led to pray for them also. It would be really, really amazing if Jo and I could both be pregnant in 2012. I'm praying to that end!

Bedtime Struggles

Nadia has been having more and more trouble falling asleep for her nap and at night. Most days she does eventually fall asleep and take a nap, but it's only because I go in her room a few times and remind her that she's supposed to be taking a nap (not playing). On Monday she didn't sleep at all. On Sunday she took a really long nap. I can't remember which day, but there was one day this week that she took so long to fall asleep that I woke her up after she had only been asleep for 60 minutes because I thought too late of a nap might make it harder for her to fall asleep at night. She's been taking at least an hour (and often more than that) to fall asleep at night. Everything has been much worse the last two weeks (since the time change). During the first week after the time changed she was getting up really early. She used to stay in her bed until I got her (around 7am). Thankfully she's stopped coming into our room each morning (that went on for a week), but I can hear evidence that she's awake (ex. coughing) around 6:20 or 6:30 each morning. To add insult to injury, she's only slept through the night once or twice over the past week because of her cold. One of us gets up once or twice in the night to give her some water or Tylenol to get her back to sleep in the middle of the night. Between getting up earlier, not sleeping through the night, and taking longer to fall asleep at night, she's really been losing a lot of sleep. And it shows. She's doing a lot of yawning these days.

Today when it seemed she was having a hard time falling asleep, I decided not to go in her room and try to help her to get to sleep. I thought maybe if she skipped her nap then she'd have an easier time falling asleep this evening. My plan was to keep tucking her in for her nap each day, but that if the norm became that she wasn't actually taking a nap (she did nap 5 of the last 7 days), that I'd just change it to a quiet time/ room time instead of a nap. If she still was taking a nap several of the days (even without my "encouragement"), then I was going to continue to tuck her in but not make an issue of it if she didn't fall asleep. Well my plan backfired this evening as she really fought going to bed tonight. I thought the process would go more smoothly since she didn't take a nap today (she did have 2 hours of quiet time). Instead she cried and screamed more than ever before. Usually putting her to bed is no big deal. So now I'm not sure what to do. Monday was the first time in a few weeks that she skipped a nap. She had been regularly taking them, but it had been taking her longer and longer to fall asleep, which meant on many days she was in her room for over 3 hours because she played for quite awhile before she fell asleep. Any suggestions? I don't want to move her bedtime back later (8pm). Maybe I shouldn't be concerned that it takes her so long to fall asleep at night? Would switching from a nap to a quiet time help? I just want her to get an adequate amount of sleep. She plays very nicely in her room so a transition to quiet time wouldn't be difficult. I'm just not sure what is the best route to go at this point. She'll be turning 3.5 years old next month. The irony is that we transitioned her to a twin size bed (from a crib) in early January, and we didn't have any issues with her getting out of the bed until this month. I figured if we had struggles over staying in bed, it would have been at the beginning. It caught me off guard that it just became an issue recently.

Ian is doing really well at night. He goes to sleep almost immediately, and he sleeps until sometime between 6:30 and 7:30am (with 7:00 being the norm). I can't remember the last time he didn't sleep through the night. He's also had a cold, but it hasn't caused him to wake during the night. He had been taking 50 minute naps until 8 days ago when he went back to taking 20-30 minute naps. I keep hoping he'll go back to 50 minutes, but it hasn't happened thus far. I'm imagining it will at some point. He often starts to nod off at the kitchen table during lunch. He usually doesn't cry when I put him down (for nap or at night). That represents progress!

My Response

In many situations we don't have control over what happens in our life, but we do have control over how we respond to the circumstances. I have been thinking about that this week. Here are some examples:

1. I had really, really been tense about wondering what my employment status will be for next semester. I am not 100% sure why I got so worked up about it because the "worst" case scenario is that I'll become a SAHM earlier than expected, which really isn't a horrible thing! Anyhow, I have to say that although it's still my first thought when I hear the phone ring, I truly have accepted the fact that I probably won't find out for a couple more weeks. I'm choosing to let go of the need to know right now.

2. When I weighed Ian today, I discovered that he had recently lost 10 ounces. I was surprised, but I didn't let it get to me. Usually I've gotten pretty discouraged when he's lost that much weight, but I just became more determined to try to get more calories into him. My goal is that he will weigh at least 25 lbs at his 2 year appt since they said he weighed 25 lbs at his 18 month appt. I figure they won't be happy if he supposedly lost weight over a period of 6 months.

3. Our last few dates have been cancelled for various reasons. I made several phone calls yesterday and today until I finally made arrangements for us to have a date tomorrow night. Sometimes you have to persevere! We're both looking forward to it as we haven't been on a date for over 3 months.

4. It feels like Ian hasn't made much progress with his eating over the past year, but when the OT left today, the last thing she said was that her goal was that by next Thanksgiving Ian would be eating table food (not pureed). I honestly didn't think that might be possible. It feels like wishful thinking, but it was encouraging to hear her say that, especially as she had told me earlier that he likely wouldn't be eating normally until age five. Here's to praying he'll be eating table food before he turns three. I've given up on my goal of him chewing and swallowing anything before he turns two. It's important to have realistic expectations.

5. I'm grateful we have medical insurance. I've had to make umpteen calls this week to hospitals, doctors offices, insurance companies, etc. because #1 Blue Shield was taking back payment from appointments in 2010 (even though we only had insurance through them at that point), #2 the wrong insurance has been billed in various instances (which meant we received a $3K bill yesterday from Hershey for the endoscopy), #3 they have goofed up with the billing for the ivf (we received bills in the mail totalling over $400 for that today even though we just paid them almost $10K for the package last month), etc. It feels sometimes that dealing with medical bills could be a full-time job! The good news is that we have insurance. It's been a nuisance, but at least (aside from the IVF) the insurance has eventually been paying all the big bills. Actually the ivf statements were encouraging because they showed that they did pay for all of my initial testing (aside from a $15 copay), which means we should be getting a refund when all the ivf stuff is totally done. I haven't even begun to tackle the project of sorting out the prescription drug bills from this summer. I need to do so.

I'm trying to see the glass as half-full in each situation that can be potentially stressful or discouraging. I can't control many of these circumstances, but I can control my attitude and response!

Thankful Thursday

1. I'm very thankful we're pursuing ivf again. I'm praying that the Lord would enable us to have one more child, but I'm also praying that He'll help me be content if the answer is "no, your family is already complete."

2. I had the sonohystogram and mock transfer today with the new RE. I am grateful everything looked fine. The procedure wasn't as painful as it was in 2007 (excruciating), but it was more uncomfortable than in it was in 2009. When I grimmaced, he reduced the size of the balloon some. As I lay there, I kept telling myself, if this discomfort results in another baby - it is SOOOO worth it.

3. The Dean and Department Chair both told me today that they haven't heard anything regarding the President's decision. I was glad that they got back to me, and I've decided not to ask them any more about it for a few weeks until it gets to the point that we're reaching the deadline for accepting/declining health insurance through PSU beginning January 1. I don't want to be a pest.

4. The reason I am more accepting of the uncertainty is because I emailed HR today and asked if I could still use the $3,500 FSA in 2012 even if I only received a few paychecks in 2012. She said that actually the full amount can be spent on January 1 even though they only take out 1/26th of it per paycheck. That was good news! I had been thinking that we'd do the ivf sooner if we knew I'd be resigning because the PSU health insurance during a pregnancy is not great (very few ultrasounds for example), but financially it's better to wait until January to do the retrieval because that means we'll save at least $700 in taxes/social security that we otherwise would have paid. Part of me wants to start the ivf process asap, but one (emotional) advantage to waiting is if the ivf doesn't work and we did it asap, I'd be getting those one line hpts right around Christmas, which wouldn't make for a very nice "gift". It's probably better to wait until January. I haven't made this decision 100% firm yet. I am going to wait until Tuesday to decide. If I hear before then that the President didn't approve my request, then I'll have to analyze the situation one last time. If I don't hear by Tuesday, we'll proceed with plans to do the retrieval in January.

5. Paul's advisor will only be in the office a few days over the next 6 weeks. This is VERY good news! Paul was able to work from home today, which meant I didn't have to take the kids with me to the RE this afternoon. My appointment was during Nadia's nap. I think that the only appointment that wouldn't take place while she's away is the embryo transfer. It also means we'll save a lot of money as Paul's car goes through a lot of gasoline every week! Ironically, I might be going to PSU on Monday. The Dean wants me to attend a meeting there that day. That's another instance when I wish I knew if I was working there in 2012. I'd be happy to go, but it seems pointless if my days are numbered.

6. So far, neither Paul or I have caught the cold that the kids both have. That's a miracle given how frequently they cough on us and wipe their noses on our clothes.

7. The Steelers won on Sunday, and as an unexpected bonus, the Ravens (who had been leading our division) lost.

8. My kids bring me so much joy every single day - their smiles, hugs, laughter, etc are so incredibly precious to me.

9. My teaching load this semester has been ideal. I wish I could have this same schedule next semester. I couldn't have asked for a more ideal schedule. If I am teaching in the evenings next semester, it's going to be an adjustment as I haven't done that since December 2010.

10. I love singing in my church's choir. We're singing in a community Thanksgiving service this Sunday evening (along with many other church choirs). We're singing Christmas music every Sunday in December including a cantata on the 18th and several other anthems on the 25th. I'm also playing the flute some in the cantata, and I'm probably going to sing a vocal solo on the 25th. I haven't sung a vocal solo since 2003. I was honored when the choir director asked me last night, especially since it's a song I really like.

I see you!

When I was playing with Ian today (while Nadia was napping), at one point I put a large foam letter P in front of my face, and I was looking through the hole in the letter. Ian laughed and said, "I see you!" I was thrilled as this was a very complete sentence! He's starting to say longer phrases (and an occasional complete sentence). Another example was earlier this week when I was trying to find one of his socks. He said, "sock where are you?" Good job, Ian! Some of his words are pronounced completely clearly, and there are others that other people wouldn't understand. Like the way he pronounces VeggieTales is "eh ale" (vowels only).

I started mixing some meat into Ian's meals yesterday (turkey lunchmeat). He was gagging on it even though I had pureed it in the Magic Bullet. I had to add a lot of pureed banana or applesauce to it to get him to swallow any of it without throwing up. I am not sure if it's the taste or texture that he doesn't like. I'm going to ask Karen on Friday if she thinks I should keep forcing the issue to get him to accept meat, or if I should go back to the beans. He's not crazy about kidney beans, but pureed beans definitely go down more easily than pureed turkey. Since Nadia has a cold, I haven't been pushing the issue of eating vegetables at dinner this week. Once she's over the cold, I'll go back to insisting she eats vegetables. It's nice to only have one child screaming at the dinner table rather than two.

This afternoon we spent some time coloring. I have to say I find coloring in a coloring book to be such a relaxing activity. Who knew? LOL! Ian was playing with Play-doh, Nadia was coloring on a blank piece or paper, and I was coloring in a coloring book. It was a sweet moment. Two other things which are extremely heartwarming to me are when they both sit on my lap and we sing together (using the CD's and books that I got about 3 years ago) and also when they both sit on my lap while I read to them. Many of the books Nadia really loves have too many words for Ian's attention span. One they both enjoy is I know a shy fellow who swallowed a cello. They also both like Miss Mary Mack. I just want to bottle up moments like that to treasure in my heart for the rest of my life.

Patience, Humility, and Creativity

There are many qualities that parents need to have. The three listed above are ones I have been thinking about lately. When I'm speaking of creativity, I'm not talking about the artsy/craftsy type. I don't have very much of that At All. I'm thinking more of creative solutions. For example, a couple of days ago I gave Ian an empty Kleenex box at the dinner table and told him to put his (licked) pretzels in it. He finds great delight in putting them in the box and then taking them out (repeat again and again). It takes longer for the rest of us to eat dinner (especially Nadia) so it's helpful to come up with activities that occupy Ian but also don't create a big mess.

I typically think of myself as a patient person; I don't lose my cool and yell or something like that. I know I'm impatient in waiting to find out how something is going to turn out (hence my penchant for breaking out the pregnancy tests sooner than some after an IUI or IVF). I'm really struggling to wait for the President's decision regarding my childrearing request. On Thursday it will be 4 weeks since I put in my request. I'll probably be calling my department chair tomorrow. I've checked with him twice thus far (the last was November 7th). I'm trying not to be a pest. I really need to know by Monday because if I'm not working next semester, Monday will be my last day on the pill. Just in case that's the route we end up going, I scheduled my mock transfer and sonohystogram for this Thursday afternoon as it has to be done before I go off the pill. If I will be teaching next semester, I'll stay on the pill until about Christmas. I'm really praying that I'll hear one way or the other by the end of this week whether my leave was approved for next semester or not.

Being a mom has helped me realize I can definitely grow in being more patient. Sometimes it shows in small instances - like Nadia taking longer than I want her to take to pick what book she wants me to read before I tuck her into bed. Sometimes I stop and think, why am I feeling so impatient when she's taking a minute or two longer than I wish she'd take? Other times it shows in bigger issues, like with Ian's sleeping and feeding issues. I've found the times I get the most irritated is when he regresses. He had been taking 50 minute naps. I've been really frustrated because he's back to 20 minute naps (for some unknown reason). Similarly, I was really, really vexed last week when he was throwing up and screaming all the time when I was trying to feed him things like pudding and baby cereal. Part of me wanted to give up and say give this boy a feeding tube. But really that wouldn't solve any of our problems. It would actually make the feeding journey longer and harder, not easier. I was losing my patience and wanted to throw in the towel. That's not an option though. Eating is a necessity. I must persevere no matter how frustrating it is our how long it takes for him to learn to eat. I love him dearly. I will do whatever it takes to teach him to eat and to make sure he gets the nourishment he needs. I will grow as a person through this and hopefully come out of this a more patient person. I'm glad no one told me when he was 9 months old (when he was first referred to the feeding team) that he might not eat normally until he was 5. I don't think I could have handled that information back then. At this point, that seems like a reasonable goal considering how long it's taken just to get him to eat baby cereal.

The past couple of months is when I've realized that humility is also needed. One example would be in regards to submitting an application for Ian to have additional medical coverage. When I was first told he was eligible (in May), I didn't want to apply because it's in some way connected to welfare. Then we received a $4K bill in the mail, and I regretted that I hadn't signed him up for medical assistance. I submitted the application last month and yesterday his card came in the mail. His coverage is effective December 1. Our health insurance will be billed as the primary insurance. If we end up back on PSU's student insurance, it means we can keep going to the local doctors and won't have to go back to driving 5-6 hours per doctor appointment. It's worth swallowing my pride for that reason. He qualified because he has a disability (not because of our finances). I don't like seeing my not yet two-year-old labeled like that, but if it means we won't get stuck with any large medical bills for him in the future, it's worth accepting the label.

Another example would be with Nadia in gymnastics and ballet. She struggles with following directions far more than any of the other kids in her classes. I'm not expecting her to be the best, but it's hard to sit and watch and realize (in both cases) she's the worst in her class. It's not like I excelled in physical skills. I'm not expecting her to be an amazing ballerina or gymnast. I just wish she was able to focus and follow directions better. At times I think, she's only 3 years old, but then that's how old some of the other kids in the classes are (although some are 4 or 5). It's not like she's defiant. She just seems to be in her own world sometimes. As I watched the ballet class yesterday, there were many times that four little girls were doing exactly what their teacher wanted them to do, and one was not (Nadia). I know it means these classes are all the more important because she doesn't struggle to follow directions in a one-on-one setting, and since I plan to homeschool it's in things like ballet and gymnastics she can learn the skill of following directions while in a group setting that others learn in preschool. One last example would be with teaching her the alphabet. I believe Nadia is smart. Her auditory memory amazes me. I think she'd also score "above normal" in terms of comprehension, expressive communication, and thinking skills. When it comes to visual things, she probably would score "below average." It's humbling for me that I am a teacher educator who is finding it a challenge to teach my three year old to identify numerals and letters. I know she'll get it eventually. I keep trying different strategies. I won't give up, but it's definitely something I hoped wouldn't be so hard for her to learn. It will be a thrilling moment once she does! Hopefully she'll pick it up in the near future, or her brother, who is 17.5 months younger than her, might know his letters and numbers before she does. Her skill with puzzles encourages me because that is also something that doesn't come naturally for her, and she recently reached the point where she can do 12 piece jigsaw puzzles independently. Yahoo for progress!!!

Our Ballerina

Here are four links to video clips from their class today:
Just Nadia - 11 seconds long
A portion of the song where the worked on the various positions - 47 seconds long
A portion of one of their songs - 37 seconds long
A portion of another of their songs (about the leaves falling down) - 22 seconds long

Lots of Laundry

I've done far more laundry than usual the past 3 days. First of all Nadia had an accident on Friday afternoon. She waited too long and had an accident near the toilet. I needed to wash her clothes plus the rug that goes around the toilet. Then she got upset at dinner because I refused to feed her. I only gave her a small portion of macaroni and cheese to eat for dinner. She is in a stage of wanting to be fed all the time, and I think at the age of almost 3.5 she should feed herself. Well she got herself so worked up that she started throwing up all over the place. Add to this the fact that Ian threw up during each of his four meals on Friday. I had to change his outfit after every meal, and he threw up on my clothes a couple of times also. He was gagging on textures that normally haven't bothered him lately, such as baby cereal. It wasn't the projectile type vomiting that occurs when his esophagitis is no longer in remission. We did better until about 10:30 last night when Nadia threw up in bed. She sabotaged her blanket, comforter, pillows, sheet, pjs, etc.
Both kids were coughing yesterday and today, and neither one was acting like his/her normal self. We stayed home from church, as I didn't want to spread their germs to others. If they seem worse tomorrow, I'll be calling the pediatrician. Ian perked up this evening, so hopefully the worst is over. I hope his cold is the reason that he's had this huge regression with eating (as long as it means he'll stop screaming over every bite once he's feeling better). Nadia took a really long nap today. She was in bed for 4 hours (although not asleep that whole time). Typically she's in bed for 2 hours these days. Ian on the other hand was in bed for 24 minutes. I think it would have done him good to take a longer nap. Unfortunately he's now had 3 days in a row where his nap was 20-30 minutes long. I thought we had gotten into a 50 minute nap routine.

Here's to hoping that the kids feel better in the near future, that Paul and I don't catch the bug, and that Nadia is up to doing ballet tomorrow as it's a Parent Visitation Day. I have really been looking forward to seeing what she's been up to the past 2 months in ballet! I'm also hoping for less laundry over the next few days, although I am very grateful for our washing machine and dryer!

23 Months Old

1. Ian's favorite pair of shoes used to be his blue Winnie the Pooh sneakers. Now his favorite shoes are a pair of brown sneakers. Ian loves to wear shoes. He sometimes wants me to put them on even when he's wearing footed pjs! He wears shoes just about any time he's not in his crib.

2. As soon as he gets out of the car (while in the garage), he takes off his jacket. The rest of us wait until we are inside the house to shed our coats. At the moment his favorite jacket is a maroon windbreaker. Unfortunately the weather is not always warm enough for me to let him wear that one.

3. He loves to sing! I don't always understand what he's trying to sing, but I love hearing his sweet singing voice. I can tell that he has memorized a lot of lyrics to a lot of songs. Some of his favorites include The Wheels on the Bus, Twinkle Twinkle, Down by the Bay, and the VeggieTales theme song.

4. He also has memorized some of the words to some books such as Miss Mary Mack and Mr. Brown Can Moo, Can You?. My guess is that he's memorized far more than I realize.

5. He had a big breakthrough over the past month in his nap. There are still days when he takes a short nap (23 minutes yesterday, for example), but a typcial nap for Ian is now 50 minutes!!! Unlike his sister (who is getting up WAY too early every morning), he made the DST switch and is sleeping until 7:00am (with the exception of this morning when he woke up at 4:45am, but he went back to sleep after crying for several minutes).

6. Thanks to the Duocal, he's gotten back up to 25.25 lbs. I am adding 300 calories a day through Duocal. This puts him up at the 20th percentile (he was at the 12th last week at the Dietician).
7. He has been really attached to his stuffed animals lately. When I put him in his crib, I have to put a stuffed animal under each of his arms (he sleeps on his belly). He hasn't been consistent in which are his favorites. For awhile it was two dogs (one is a husky), but he also has been clingy with a kitty, pig, chicken, monkey, etc.
8. He's now drinking rice drink  (32 ounces a day) in addition to pureed foods. Milk, soy, eggs, peanuts, oats, and cinnamon are all currently on the "to be avoided" list. I have found that almond milk works better than rice drink or coconut milk for making him pudding. I add rice cereal to almost every meal.

9. His favorite shirt is one with a moose on it. As for his Sunday clothes, he prefers the vests that have vehicles on them. He has VERY strong opinions about what clothes he wants to wear. Many tears are shed while I get him dressed.                                          10. His vocabulary continues to explode. He has tried to count to ten. He usually skips some numbers in the middle, but he'll say 7, 8, 9, and 10 at the end.

11. He knows the colors yellow, orange, red, blue, and green. He's correctly identified a couple of letters (E, H). He can correctly identify quite a few shapes: triangle, moon, heart, star, square, etc.

12. He says a variety of two word phrases such as "my shoes, " "clean up," "thank you," "wear it," and "all done."

13. He cries when I'm feeding him anything other than pudding, and sometimes he even cries with pudding. Once when that happened Nadia said to him, "For Pete's sake, it's only pudding, Ian!"  On Tuesday Karen suggested that I start crushing some Gerber puffs and give him that by spoon so that he can learn to eat solid food that's not mixed in with a puree. He's just been throwing up whenever I try that, and in fact I think that's the reason he's been regressing this week. Yesterday I had to change his outfit after every meal. It was all I could do not to burst into tears during dinner. It's no wonder Paul doesn't come home from school in time for dinner. Dinner isn't a pleasant place to be given Nadia's aversion to all vegetables and Ian's aversion to everything that's served via a spoon. A lot of crying takes place at the dinner table. Thus far it hasn't been from me, but some days I think I'll make it a trio.

14. He has gotten better about throwing pretzels on the floor after he's done licking them. I started to make him clean up the mess after every meal, and this strategy worked wonders. I should have thought of doing it this way a few months ago. He now knows to ask for "more" when he wants more pretzels (instead of just crying). He goes through a LOT of pretzels every day.

15. He's started hitting Nadia, unfortunately. Thankfully it's really a very gentle touch (doesn't hurt one iota). As he does it, he says "ow." I am trying to teach him that we don't hit! I think most of the time he does it to get her to chase him. He loves to be chased!!!

16. He can't stand to walk through leaves. I couldn't get a picture of him sitting or lying in leaves. He will go out of his way to walk around them. If I hold his hand and he has to walk through leaves, he screams (even though he's wearing shoes, socks, and pants). I have no idea why it's so traumatic.

17. He's also gone back to crying when I brush his teeth and making it almost impossible to trim his nails. It's also a tragedy when I change his diaper in the morning. He often has a full blown tantrum. It's a challenge to clean him and put a clean diaper on him while he's screaming, kicking, and arching his back! He also stands by the gate and cries whenever I go upstairs even if I'm only gone for a minute or two.

18. He loves to watch VeggieTales. He asks to watch it every time I put him in the car. I only turn it on if #1 I am afraid he will fall asleep in the car (particularly if it's around 11am or noon) or #2 if we're going to be in the car for more than an hour (which doesn't happen much any more now that we can go to local doctors).

19. He's getting much better at going up and down the stairs. Sometimes he goes up and down by walking (instead of crawling). I have to hold his hand to keep him safe.

20. His puzzle skills have greatly improved in the past month. He can now do peg puzzles all by himself!

21. He's gotten better over the past month with not crying as much when I drop him off in the nursery on Sunday mornings. He's also been doing better lately with not crying while I shower and get dressed in the morning.

22. He loves to hold my phone when we're talking to one of his Grandmas. He still constantly tries to get his hands on the tv remote and my purse (in particular my wallet).

23. He still loves vehicles of all types! It comes in  handy as I can throw several matchbox cars in the diaper bag, and that keeps him entertained for a large portion of Nadia's gymnastics class. I do let him play on the equipment for part of her class. He does really well on the balance beams!

In only one month my baby will turn two years old! Gasp!

New Libriarian

We got a new librarian the end of August. I really miss the previous one. Melissa used a cd player and had the kids singing active songs (ones that involved marching and such) in between the books that she read them. She had interesting crafts at the end of the storytime. Altogether the program lasted 45-60 minutes. This summer they split the kids into two groups. Melissa was with the 3-5 year olds, and a volunteer was with the 1-3 year olds. I have to say the volunteer (a teacher) did an even more amazing job. I haven't been impressed with Megan (new librarian), but I kept going in the hopes it would get better.

Today was the worst. She couldn't even manage the children, and she only read one book. She didn't select a book that was appropriate for the age of the children present. They advertise the storytime as being for children ages 0-5. Most of the kids are 2 or 3 years old. She read a book about Amelia Bedelia running for mayor. The kids didn't comprehend the humor At All. The program lasted less than 15 minutes as she only read them one story. She's never included any singing, and she just passes out a paper the kids can color at home at the end. I've decided it's not worth the hassle to go anymore. It takes me longer to get the kids shoes and coats on, get them in their carseats, and drive there than it would take to read them one story at home. I will say Megan is VERY expressive when she reads, but that wasn't of benefit today because she couldn't be heard. Thankfully, the program Nadia attends on Wednesdays is excellent. Some parts of it definitely go over her head (such as this week when she was trying to teach the kids about 1/6), but I think it's good for her to learn to sit and listen. Karen (OT) told us on Tuesday that she needs to start coming to see Ian on Fridays instead of Tuesdays, so maybe it's all for the best that we are not going to go to this library program any more. It's disappointing, but at least we have other options as far as storytime goes. We'll go back to our library this summer if the program is anywhere near as good as it was this past summer! Today's highlight was running into a former student of mine (she graduated in May 2010) who now works for the IU. I taught her in fall 2009. She remembered that Ian was born during finals week that semester.

Tonight I'm trying out a new hairdresser. A new salon opened in our town this week. The one I tried two times ago was awful - one of my worst haircuts ever. The one I tried last time was acceptable - not amazing but definitely better than the one before that. I'm hoping that I'll like this one and that the prices are reasonable. They are open until 8pm several nights a week, which is a plus! My hair has been driving me crazy lately as it's been too long since I last got it cut.

On Wednesday my department chair told me he thought the President would make a decision regarding my leave in the "next few days." HR told me that I could sign up for FSAs even though I'm not certain if I'll be working next year. Today I set up a $3,500 medical one (the ivf will cost far more than that, but that's the maximum that can be claimed in 2012). The neighbors didn't seem to like signing the forms for the dependent one in 2010, so I decided not to set up a dependent care account even though it would save us at least $100 next year. I really, really hope to hear an answer in the next few days as the suspense is very hard for me and also if I'm not going to be teaching next semester then I'll be going off the bcp in about 10 days. I'll be on bcp for several more weeks if I am teaching next semester. It's been 3 weeks since I put in my request. I can't see how it's to their advantage to delay the decision making process as they'll need to hire someone to teach either 2 or all 4 of my classes. I had hoped to know by the end of this week, but I can't see that happening. I'm REALLY praying I'll find out next week.