Much Better!

Well last night went sooo much better. There were two stretches where we went 2 hours in between the start of feedings, and then the rest of the morning she woke up every hour. I felt sooo much better this morning than I did yesterday morning. Hopefully tonight will be another good night because unlike Saturday and Sunday when I took LOTS of naps, I only got one nap today due to working on stuff for the house (mortgage application, etc.). I apologize that there aren't any new photos. I promise to take some tomorrow! Four dresses I bought on eBay came in the mail today, and they are preemie size so they should fit! I am excited to dress her in her first dress tomorrow! It's about time!!!

Stayed Home

Well I was planning to take Nadia to church this morning, but last night was a rough night. I got about 2 consecutive hours of sleep and then maybe 1 hour cumulative the rest of the night. I felt miserable and decided to stay home. Hopefully next Sunday we'll be up to going. A big change with Nadia over the past few days is now she is staying awake more. Her days used to be filled with only eating or sleeping. It's fun to see her eyes open more!

Yesterday we got my billing info in the mail. My stay came to a total of $19,678.97. Thank goodness for health insurance. I don't expect Paul and I will owe a dime towards either bill (which now total over $70K!!). I don't think I mentioned it before, but I did have my 3rd Rhogam shot while in the hospital as Nadia has O+ blood (I have O- and Paul has AB+).

I would never have guessed that my daughter would be 19 days old & have not worn a dress yet. Well it was several days til she could wear any clothing due to the jaundice, but the problem since then is that the smallest dress I had was size 0-3 months. Donna bought her a newborn size dress this week, but even that is still too big at the moment. I have purchased a few things in preemie and newborn on eBay the last several days. Hopefully they will come soon! Preemie fits her perfectly and some newborn. There seems to be a big variation in what is "newborn" size (supposed to be for 5-8 lbs.).

Paul has been busy working on chapter 3 which he plans to send his advisor tomorrow. He has to send the entire (4 chapter) thesis to his 4 committee members by July 23 as he is defending it on the 29th. Paul's advisor's wife sent Nadia two gifts last week from our BRU registry which was really sweet (a wearable blanket and an inchworm toy).

What a relief!

I feel sooo relaxed today for the first time in 2+ weeks. It's such a relief to know Nadia is gaining weight and the next check up isn't for 2 weeks. Whew... There has been so much pressure with feeding her. In the NICU they'd empty her stomach to measure how much she got from me after I nursed her. Then there were all the weight checks. It still amazes me what a big deal the doctors in the NICU made the day she lost 5 grams. It was the first day that all her nutrition was from me (no IV, no formula by stomach tube). I think actually that was pretty amazing that she pretty much held her own that day. There are 28 grams in an ounce so 5 grams is really a very tiny amount!!! Even this Wednesday she was weighed before and after I nursed her. The second reason I feel very relaxed is that our house is under contract! We put it on the market almost exactly 4 months ago. It's so nice to know it won't be shown any more - no more getting everything "just so" and having to leave the house at random times. We were so excited about the offer, but we were nervous since Edward hadn't seen the house yet. It is a tremendous relief now that he has been here and the inspections have been completed (well we won't get the radon test results until Monday). We are soooo grateful that we can move on August 11 as it means Paul will only have a long commute to PSU for just one week! PTL! One thing we will probably miss about this house will be all the wildlife. I am doubting we'll see so much wildlife at our new house. Here are some photos I took yesterday of two turkeys with their babies (the baby turkeys are harder to see but there were quite a few in the photo) as well as of two fawns who were running around chasing each other in our yard several times throughout the day (and again this morning). You can see their mother was very aware of my presence! The other good thing is today I can actually take NAPS (I've already had one this morning!). The doctor appointments and house "stuff" were really interfering with my ability to take naps.

GAINED WEIGHT!

Nadia weighed 5lbs 12 1/4 oz at the doctor's office today. WOOHOO! This was 1.75 ounces more than she weighed on Wednesday and 1.25 more than she weighed when discharged from NICU on 7-1. We don't have to go back to the doctor for 2 weeks!! Today her SS# came in the mail, so I stopped at the HR dept at work after her appt to get her signed up for our health insurance. We definitely need her on our insurance as the statement we got in the mail yesterday for Nadia's medical bills totaled $51,096.48. YIKES!!!

The other good news of the day is that everything went well with the home inspection. All systems are go for the sale of our home! Our buyer even would like to buy our riding mower and snow blower which is an added bonus. We won't need either of these at our new property.

1/2 Ounce

Well Nadia had her first trip on campus today. I stopped in briefly to pick up my mail and introduce her to a few people before her doctor appt. In Nadia's first week of life she lost 7 ounces (probably a little more as the pediatrician weighs her w/ diaper on whereas the NICU didn't). In her second week of life she lost 1/2 ounce. Her weight this morning was 5 lbs 10 1/2 oz (she weighed 6lb 2oz at birth and 5 lbs 11 oz last Wed). She needs to start gaining weight! We go back Friday afternoon for another weight check. I'm praying she'll gain at least one ounce by then. They had me nurse her and then weighed her again. After nursing her about 30 minutes she gained 1/4 ounce.

The first photo is of a balloon I was given by my colleagues two full months ago. I can't believe it's lasted this long!!! The second was taken yesterday. Since Daddy can't hold her (due to poison ivy) when I've been holding her and need to do something (like use the bathroom) this is where I put her (with Paul watching her). She's wearing a preemie outfit that Donna (from church) brought yesterday when she delivered some groceries for us. Thanks, Donna!!! Her daughter had received this outfit, but it didn't fit her granddaughter (as a side note, I had Donna's daughter as a student at the university). The socks she is wearing here were a gift from Cheri. These socks win the prize as they NEVER fell off (and she wore them more than 12 hours). Wow! The other socks she owns tend to fall off pretty easily.

Tomorrow morning Paul will be at the house we are hoping to buy as the inspections (home, radon, pest) are being done. Yesterday he sent his advisor chapter two of his thesis which means he's half-way done. That chapter was 31 pages long. He has about 2 weeks to finish. The man buying our home will be coming to see it Friday morning (for the first time) and then in the afternoon he's having the inspections done (home, radon, water, sewer, and pest). We are praying everything goes well on Friday!!!

My shoes FIT today. WOOHOO! My feet are not 100% back to normal in terms of the swelling, but we're almost there. I weighed myself at the doctor's office and found that I have lost 10 lbs in the last week (water weight I am sure!). Last Tues I wasn't very happy when I was weighed and had only lost 8 lbs. So now I've lost 18 lbs since 6-23 (day I went into labor). I guess the rest of the weight will probably take a lot longer to lose. Once I feel up to exercising that should help. I think I need a little more sleep first though! It's amazing to me how well I am functioning these days on 1/2 the sleep I usually get. So how long does this sleep deprivation state last? Just wondering how many more weeks I have left before I get a more reasonable amount of sleep. Well it will help once Paul is able to hold her again. I have great admiration for single parents having gone 5 days as the only one caring for Nadia!!

Two Weeks Old!

Envelopes bearing Nadia's name have already been making their way to our mailbox. Her first piece of mail arrived on 7-3 (her birth certificate). I thought that was pretty fast! That day we also got a wedding invitation in the mail, and the envelope inside had all three of our names. :-) Yesterday her health insurance card came in the mail; I need to call them as #1 it just said "Baby Girl Kennedy" and #2 they automatically assigned her the same primary care doctor that Paul & I have whereas I actually have selected a pediatrician for her (rather than a family care doctor). Tomorrow she will see Dr. M again. I am praying for good news regarding her weight!!!

I didn't eat any chocolate on Friday, Saturday, or Sunday. I had a Klondike bar last night which had some chocolate. I am happy to say that her poopy diapers seem the same from Saturday night through Monday night so it doesn't seem to matter whether I eat chocolate or not. I'll continue to monitor that though to make certain what I eat isn't bothering her in any way.

Sunday night was her BEST night in terms of sleep. I got about 5 hours of sleep over a period of 9 hours. WOOHOO! Her fussy period was shorter that night. However then yesterday she had a harder time sleeping in the pack n' play during the day. Of course if she wants to be held I would MUCH rather do so during the day than at 3am. :-) Last night was back to an average night. She nursed almost nonstop from 8pm to 1am. I kid you not. Then finally she started sleeping. Well I will hope for more nights like Sunday night, but until that happens it just means I need to take more naps during the day. It would help A Lot if Paul could hold her. He hasn't held her since Saturday morning before he went to the doctor for his poison ivy.

I am including a photo of the house we are in the process of buying. The couple gave a counter offer which was $5k higher than our offer (which was $10,900 less than their current asking price). We accepted their counter offer! They came down in price $38,900 over the past 4 months. Now to just keep praying that the man who is buying our house won't change his mind. He is coming to see the house at 11:00 on Friday. We are set to close on both houses on August 11.

I also have included a couple of photos of Nadia. I had to take one of her belly button. Someone said her "outie" might become an "innie;" we shall see. I can't wait to be able to post a photo of her smiling. It just melts my heart! Her dimple is just adorable!!!

On my own

Well I survived my first night on my own. Paul was downstairs the whole night. The hardest stretch the last few nights has been from 8pm til midnight or 1am. I get almost no sleep during those hours. I'm hoping tonight will be better. Last night she had another explosive bm, and I hadn't had any chocolate for 2 days. So maybe the nurse was right. I had frozen some brownies so maybe I'll eat one tomorrow and see what happens. The best thing from last night was that we made serious progress on going without the shield. Some feedings it wasn't used at all. It's varied throughout the day today. At least a part of every feeding is done w/o it.

My swelling is going down a lot. My calves are now back to normal. I had almost forgotten what they used to look like, LOL. My feet and ankles have improved some, but they're still not back to normal. I am hopeful though that probably by Tuesday (2 weeks after having her) that they will be their normal size. I want to be weighed at her doctor appt on Wed as the scale didn't show much improvement last Tues, but I think a lot of it was water weight. I've been wearing non-maternity clothes so it seem I must have lost most of the weight. I hope so anyhow!

Nadia met 2 of her 8 cousins today (and cousin #9 will be born in November). Brandi (who will turn 14 in August) was thrilled to hold Nadia. Of course Grandma and Pop Pop also took their turns holding her as well. :-) Shawn (age 12) assembled one of her toys for her (ball popper).

So Sorry!

Nadia is only 11 days old, and already I have apologized to her a few times. I can see that it's easy to be aware of one's faults as a parent. The first time was the day we came home from the hospital, and I took off her hat and realized that the white headband she was wearing was too tight and had left a mark all around her head. I felt awful! The second time was on Thursday night in the middle of the night she was really fussy, and I forgot to check her diaper. The next time I checked it I found she had a HUGE bm that was all up her back, etc. It was crusted on her on some places. I felt terrible! Then I felt even worse when she had another big bm (although I caught that one right away so it stayed in the diaper area), and my mom said probably it was because I had eaten a frosty from Wendy's that night. I felt terrible! I did ask the lactation nurse about that yesterday, and she said that loose bowels are normal for breastfed babies. She didn't think it had anything to do with what I ate. However, she hasn't had another bm like that so I think my mom was right that it was from the frosty. Well although I love chocolate, I love Nadia FAR more; so I will go without if that's necessary!!!

Praying that she'll sleep well tonight since Paul can't help me due to his poison ivy. Also praying for progress on elimination of the shield. She can latch on without it, but she doesn't stay on very long and gets frustrated so then I switch to the shield. At least she nurses for a couple of minutes w/o the shield each time. Well I think I shall catch a nap before the next feeding.

Daddy's Turn

Well Mommy and Nadia have been seen by plenty of doctors and nurses the past 12 days. Today was Daddy's turn. Even though Grandma was the one who did the yard work this week (she used a riding mower for the first time and also weeded our flower beds), Paul somehow got poison ivy on his arms. He hasn't had it in a few years. He is very careful to wear gloves and such to avoid getting it as when he gets it - he gets a very bad case of it. The only thing he did outside was show my mom how to use the riding mower; so it is a mystery how he got it. He has been using Calamine lotion and taking Tylenol Allergy and such but hasn't gotten much relief. It's mostly on his arms so he's been trying to be careful not to pass it on to Nadia or myself. The doctor gave him some steroids and said he shouldn't hold Nadia for a week. EEK! I am overwhelmed by this.

 

I forgot to mention earlier that the glider was delivered on Wednesday afternoon. I slept on the couch in the living room on Tuesday night since it hadn't arrived yet, but I slept in our bed and Nadia slept in her crib on Wednesday night since I could make use of the glider for nursing. It is VERY comfortable!!! I will take a photo of it later. Thank you, Mom and Dad (Christmas gift)! It was supposed to be delivered 3 weeks after we ordered it. If that had happened, it would have arrived before Nadia even though she came 24 days early, but the timing still worked out well since we were in the hospital longer than expected.

Her early arrival meant the summer session wasn't quite over when she arrived. I taught Monday night and then 2 hours later my water broke. The last class was to be on Wednesday night as well as the final exam so on Wednesday morning I made arrangements for someone to proctor the exam. My department chair said my students could be let out early (only take the exam that night). I emailed the answer key as well. Thankfully the exam was multiple choice. Many times I give essay exams and that would have been a nightmare this time! A secretary emailed me the results (graded by Scantron), and I was able to post the exam and attendance grades (which I had to do from memory as the attendance sheets were in my office) on Blackboard using my laptop in the hospital room (thank goodness for wireless internet access!). The grades had to be submitted to the Registrar by noon on Wed. Normally I submit my grades the first day they can be submitted (which would have been Friday in this case). However, this time I didn't finish until about 2 hours before the deadline. Thankfully my GA helped with grading some papers, but I was frantically grading papers and calculating course grades on Wednesday morning. Thankfully now I can take a few weeks off. Technically I am "off" for 8 weeks, but I hadn't quite finished my "to do" list since Nadia came earlier than I expected. However nothing is due until August 15 so I can definitely take a few weeks off of schoolwork and just be a FT Mommy for now.

One of the 4 lactation nurses I worked with in the hospital called me yesterday to check on how things were doing. I told her about the pediatrician wanting Nadia off the shield. Amy said I shouldn't push it until Nadia's weight was going in the right direction. She said if I pump 2-3 times a day that will compensate for the problem the shields can cause. So yesterday I resumed pumping. I am trying though to get her to nurse w/o the shield as much as possible though (at least during the day - my patience at night is much less). She asked me to come in on July 14 so they can show me some tricks for getting her off the shield.

Yesterday my mom left about 7:30am. Later that morning Paul and I made our first shopping trip with Nadia. She did fine as she slept the whole time in the sling. I didn't fare as well. I went to the baby section and was buying diapers, wipes, Balmex, etc. while Paul was picking up some odds and ends - a light bulb for the lamp in the nursery, etc. Then we did some food shopping together. Part way through the food shopping I started to feel AWFUL - ankles killing me, dizzy, hungry, etc. We had been there about 30 minutes. We planned to go to Sears next to get her some clothes in newborn or preemie, but I knew I had done enough so we just went straight home. The most important purchase we made was a second swaddling blanket. The first one had been stained the day before and she didn't sleep AT ALL in the pack n play when we were w/o a clean swaddling blanket. This led to a very rough night on Thursday night. I got at the most 3 hours of sleep that night. The first swaddling blanket came from BRU where there are many choices of colors and patterns (hers has butterflies). Walmart only had one choice - white with yellow dots. I bought it, but I admit I would have preferred ANY other color as yellow is not what I want to see on her while she still has some jaundice! We didn't end up buying any clothing. Paul had bought her 2 preemie size outfits on Tuesday night - a yellow one (again I am not really wanting to put her in it) and one from a boy's rack (dinosaurs). I had to use the dinosaur one today. It's not feminine. Blue is a good color for her, but I am not wanting to dress her in something that came from the boy's rack, LOL. Oh well. It does fit her perfectly (preemie size). Hopefully in the next couple of days I'll be up to another shopping trip - maybe Sears? to buy a few more outfits in either newborn or preemie size as mostly I just have 0-3 months and up and they are WAY too big on her. I believe one of her cousins will approve of her outfit today as Susie LOVES dinosaurs! :-)

The swaddling blanket did the trick again yesterday, and I had zero troubles getting he to nap in the pack n play yesterday. Last night was a little rougher than the day time but WAY better than the previous night. However that was due in part to the fact that Paul held her awhile which won't be an option tonight. :-( Hopefully Nadia will have a good night since I'll be on my own.

Home Sweet Home!

Well Monday night was a really rough night. First of all the night nurse (the nurses work 12 hour shifts 7-7 so she had 2 nurses a day) was really chatty. I tried to go to bed at 8pm but she kept coming in and chatting about all sorts of topics - SIDS, Shaken Baby Syndrome, etc. all throughout the night (even 2 am and such!). Second, Nadia had the sleep study test during the night in which she had to stay in the car seat for 2 hours and unfortunately she woke up about 1/2 way through the test and was crying. My mom, bless her heart, got on the floor and held a pacifier in Nadia's mouth for 45 minutes during the middle of the night so I could get a little sleep. Then Nadia was weighed and she had lost 55 grams. I cried a lot over this news as the nurse said that this meant we probably wouldn't be discharged. The doctors were upset the day before when she lost 5 grams; so I know they'd be very upset over 55 grams. She was down to 5 lbs. 12 oz which meant she lost 6 ounces since birth. Then in the early morning we got her bilirubin count back and that had gone up (from 9 something to 11 something). I lost it. I called Paul and asked him to come in. I wanted to go home SOOO badly and felt it was now not going to happen.

At 9am Paul and I went to see a midwife to have my staples removed. I think the nurse and midwife were questionning my emotional stability as I just couldn't stop crying. Well my mood dramatically shifted when we got back to the room as we had missed the doctors doing their rounds while I was at my appointment and they had decided Nadia could be discharged! What "saved the day" was a poopy diaper. The doctors thought she hadn't had one in a 24 hours which wasn't true. My mom showed them the chart I had been keeping to record her wet and dirty diapers as well as how long and when I nursed. When doing the rounds usually the doctors didn't actually look at Nadia, but this time the head doctor came in and checked her diaper and PTL she had a messy diaper right at that moment so he said she can go home. PTL!!! I burst into tears again when my mom told us the news, but this time they were tears of joy. I felt like a burden had been lifted off of my shoulders. I have such respect for the families whose babies spend weeks and months in NICU. I think it's a very stressful experience. I had spent 8 nights at the hospital in 4 different rooms, and I was so very glad to be going HOME. The two conditions set for her discharge were that we would take her to see her pediatrician on Wednesday morning for a weight and bilirubin check and that I would give her formula by bottle after nursing her. I of course agreed. I would have agreed to just about anything if it meant we could go home.

On the way to the car in the early afternoon, I stopped at the RE's office to introduce the nurses, RE, etc. to Nadia. They were thrilled! They called out the embryologist, doctor, nurses, etc and all were so happy to see her. Dr. A gave her a kiss. It turns out his youngest granddaughter is also named Nadia. Paul was having the car seat inspection while I was at the RE. Once that was done, Nadia had her first experience in a car seat. She hated being strapped in, but once we were in motion she went to sleep (pretty typical behavior for babies).

Tuesday night was less stressful, but I got barely any sleep. She was accustomed to the NICU beds which had soft boundaries around her, and she was allowed to sleep on her belly. Of course at home neither of those are allowed due to SIDS. So she and I got very little sleep. I did pass her off to Paul at 3am and asked him to hold her for 30 minutes so I could get a little sleep. The best trick we've found so far (aside from letting her sleep in one of our arms) is to swaddle her up (see photo). I am sure she is very glad though to be in a place where her heel isn't being pricked all the time (see photo).

Wednesday morning we took her to the pediatrician. I think I made a good choice as Dr. M was very relaxed. She looked at Nadia's coloring and said the bilirubin test was not necessary, and although she had lost more weight (5 lb 11 oz with her diaper on whereas the previous day when she weighed 5 lb 12 oz that was w/o a diaper), she wasn't concerned about that either. She told me to stop supplementing with formula which I have done, and she also wanted me to stop using the contact shield (which the lactation nurses suggest the moms of NICU babies use as it makes nursing easier for the babies). I haven't completely weaned her off the shield yet. We go back next week for another weight check. I am hoping at the bare minimum she will not have lost any more weight, and I am actually hoping she'll have gained weight. Maybe she can get back to 6 lbs by then? She is nursing well so I hope that means she's putting on some weight. I am nursing her every 2 hours around the clock to try to keep her belly full. Sometimes during the night she wakes up every hour so sometimes only 30 minutes passes between the ending of a feeding and the start of the next feeding.

On the way home from the pediatrician, we stopped at my university. My mom ran up to my office to check my mail. The letter I was waiting for was there! I am being promoted to Associate Professor in August. WOOHOOO! The letter was dated 6-24 (Nadia's birthday)! What a relief to know I don't need to apply for promotion again in the fall as it was a VERY time consuming process. It also helps me to feel more at ease about resigning off of some committees so I will have more time to be a MOMMY.

Last night went MUCH better. Although there still were stretches where I only got 30 minutes of rest in between feedings, there were a couple of times where I got 60-90 minutes of sleep, and that made all the difference. I felt like a new woman today! Although my feet, ankles, and calves are still VERY swollen, I can now put my feet flat on the ground which is making getting around easier. My balance is still off so when I climb the stairs with Nadia I put her in the sling.

My mom has been a big help. She is headed back to MD tomorrow. We are so grateful that she has spent the last week with us!!! She loves us very much to be willing to transport me to feedings every 2-3 hours while in the hospital, etc. Nadia has taken quite a few naps in her Grandma's arms. Paul's parents stopped in last night after Paul's mom's 4th chemo treatment. Paul's mom also loves to hold Nadia. :-)

I will close with a few observations of changes we have noticed in Nadia over the past week:

• When she was born, she didn't have any eyebrows or eye lashes. We have watched her eyelashes come in. They have gone from blonde to brown and have grown a little bit each day. Right now they are very uneven. I am curious to see how long they'll be in the end. I have long eyelashes. So far about the only quality she has similar to me is that she gets the hiccups alot, LOL.


• Her umbilical cord stump fell off today.


• She doesn't cry as much when her diaper is changed as she did at first.
  
• She has greatly improved in her abilities to nurse.