Off of oxygen!

This morning I learned that Oliver had been moved from bed #1 to bed #25, and his current bed is in the special care (NSCU) rather than intensive care (NICU) unit. They made several changes to his care - one of which was to continue the room air trials and another was to discontinue his doses of caffeine. They started a room air trial right before I arrived today, and the whole 3.5 hours  I was there he wasn't on any oxygen. He had some episodes where his satuation levels were too low and/or his respiration levels were too high, but overall he did very well. I was pleasantly surprised when I called to check on him at 8:30pm that he was still in room air! Wow! I'll be anxious to hear in the morning if they put the cannula back in his nose or not. In light of this improvement as well as starting to work on nursing, I asked that they move his feeding tube to his nose. It's currently going over his tongue. The first feeding session (noon) wasn't successful because he slept pretty much the entire time. I held him for 2 1/4 hours and then put him back in his isolette so I could go to the bathroom and pump again. When I got back, I noticed he was awake. I changed his diaper again and then decided to attempt feeding session #2 even though they hadn't started his feed yet, and they said they try to do it at the same time so the babies associate a full belly with nursing. I am glad I seized the moment because he did great! He latched on multiple times on both sides! He didn't last long, but it seemed like a big step forward. The plan is to do the same tomorrow and then start nursing him every 3 hours around the clock starting sometime on Wednesday, as he'll be 34 weeks that day (which is the earliest they encourage nursing at this NICU).

The best news of the day was when his doctor told me that another doctor will be taking over Oliver starting tomorrow and will be his doctor for the next two weeks. She told me that she expects that during that time Oliver will be discharged. It depends on Oliver, but that was very exciting to me! When he was born I was thinking - 4 weeks even though the other NICU said most likely 6 weeks. Maybe my 4 week estimate will be accurate as tomorrow he'll be 2 weeks old. It would be awesome if he could come home around Labor Day (about 4 weeks before his EDD). Today was the first time since 6pm last Tuesday that I had changed his diaper. Somewhere during that time span he got out of the merconium phase. His poop today was yellow and runny rather than black and tarry.

Last night I did a load of laundry and *thought* we did a load of dishes in case I would be checking into the Ronald McDonald House tomorrow. This morning it wasn't until I had put away about 80% of the dishes that I discovered Paul and I had a miscommunication last night, and he hadn't run the dishwasher. I had been putting dirty dishes into the cupboards. That was a mess to try to get the dirty ones back into the dishwasher. I also went through some boxes in Nadia and Ian's closets to put some fall clothes into their dresser drawers (ex. pants). I also went through Nadia's clothes and took some of her spring/summer items to the basement (particularly any that were size 3T). Ian wore size 24 month pants for the first time today. He's definitely shorter than Nadia was because when she was his age she was wearing 24m pants, but I had to roll the waistband for his pants to fit him, and he'll be 3 years old in 4 months! I thought it was time for him to move past size 18 month (for pants - he's been wearing 24m/2T for everything else for several months). This is the time of year when the weather is constantly changing and one needs to have access to a variety of articles of clothing.

A young woman from church (who is an early childhood major at my university) watched the kids today for 5 hours and will watch them again tomorrow during the same time span. She's really nice, but the two main reasons I don't prefer that the kids go to her house too much are #1 her idea of babysitting is to let them watch Disney movies for hours on end and #2 they have a few cats (and a dog) and both kids are sneezing and rubbing their eyes by the end of the day. Paul's parents are going to watch the kids on Wednesday and Thursday, and they'll go to Sarah's house on Friday.

They used to give nursing moms one meal pass a day at this hospital, but they don't do that any more. They are still doing that at the hospital in Harrisburg. I used a $5 pass on Monday and Tuesday in the cafe last week. However, if I will be staying at the Ronald McDonald House (which costs $15 a night), I should be able to get some free meals there. I can't wait until life settles back into "normal" here at home. I told the woman who brought us dinner tonight that Oliver should be coming home soon. I said we could make this week the last week for meals, but she said she already has the meals lined up for next week so we'll make next week the last week. I am so very grateful for all the ways my church family has helped us out over the past 10 weeks!

Daddy's Turn

Monday (when Oliver was 6 days old) was the day I held him the first time. Yesterday (when Oliver was 11 days old) was the first time Paul held him. I'm guessing that the next two family members to hold him will be his two grandmas. He definitely prefers to be held kangaroo style. His saturation levels were in the 80's when Paul was holding him, and then when I had him under my shirt his level stayed at 100%. Previously any level above 95% would set off the alarm, but now that he's on room air it doesn't matter how high it goes.

Ian and Nadia both like being able to touch Oliver. They've both asked to hold him, but that's not going to happen until we're at home, and even then it would be under very close supervision. It was so nice to see Oliver without a CPAP and IV. They tried twice (once last night and once during the day today) to take him off the oxygen compeletly, but both times his saturation levels dropped too low. The last three days when the doctors did their rounds they started in Oliver's pod so the nurse told us yesterday to arrive at 9am today if we wanted to be there during rounds. Unfortunately the doctors started at a different end of the NICU today and didn't come to his bedside until after 3pm. The other days I was there at 3pm, but today we came in the morning per the nurse's suggestion. We left at 11am. The kids and Paul made a brief visit in the NICU, but most of the time I just snuggled with him (Kangaroo style). It's always so hard to leave. It feels strange to only hold a baby for 30-60 minutes a day, but I know when I'm back to giving him lots of attention then I'll feel badly about not seeing Nadia and Ian. I'm going to struggle with feeling guilty one way or the other until all three children are under the same roof.

During the rounds today the doctors changed his status, which probably means he'll be moving to a different pod. He's been with the micro-preemies, but now he's considered to be stable, which means his vitals won't be taken as frequently, and he can start wearing clothes again (he hasn't worn any since 8am on Wednesday). They also have started the process of getting him to work on learning to regulate his own body temperature. When he achieves that goal, he'll be moved out of the isolette. He's up to a full feed now (34ml every 3 hours). He's allowed to start the first step toward learning to nurse tomorrow. I am planning on being there for his noon and 3pm feeds tomorrow. If he seems to get the hang of it, then I'm planning on returning on Tuesday morning and not coming home until he's discharged. At least I'll have a car. The other times I stayed at the Ronald McD House while Nadia and Ian were in the NICU, I didn't have a car with me. I'm hoping that maybe he'll be home in about 2 weeks. The three goals that have to be met are getting off the oxygen, maintaining his body temperature, and learning to nurse. Although it will be hard to be separated from Paul, Nadia, and Ian again, it will be easier to nap during the day if I'm only responsible for Oliver. As to be expected since I'm pumping around the clock, I'm very sleep deprived on top of aching all over the place as I come off of 10+ weeks of bed rest.

We set up Oliver's room today. Nothing has been hung on his walls yet, but the crib is ready and the other furniture has been arranged. I think it looks great! I reassembled Paul's computer on the desk that's now in our bedroom, but zero progress has been made on all the piles of books and papers. I predict that will take weeks (months?). The good news is that Paul sent his advisor a 20 page draft of part of his final paper (and this will be the heart of his dissertation) a few days ago, and she gave him very positive feedback today. Today I made tuna noodle casserole, and Nadia and I made a batch of chocolate chip cookies (that Nadia and I wanted) and a batch of butterscotch oatmeal cookies (that Paul wanted). Yum! I've tried to make the last 5 days as normal as possible even though it's very painful to stand on my feet. If I had known Ian was going to take a long nap today (75 minutes), I would have napped at the same time. The other days his nap had been 30 minutes or less. Another bit of happy news regarding Ian today was that he ate his breakfast (toast) VERY quickly all by himself. It was such a relief to have one meal that wasn't a lengthy ordeal.

CPAP to Cannula

Even though I am physically exhuasted, emotionally it feels great to be far more productive. Yesterday in addition to the housework, I also signed Nadia up for gymnastics and dance. For gymnastics I decided to wait until the middle of October to resume that Wednesday morning activity. I signed up for the same 9:00 class she took last year because it works out so nicely in conjunction with the 10:00 preschool story time at the library. In January, Ian will also be joining that class. I had a harder time deciding for ballet, which will start on September 2. I was torn between a Monday morning class at another studio or a 4:00pm Tuesday class with the teacher she had last year. I decided to go with the Tuesday class because it's a combination of ballet and tap dance. I thought it would be good to let her try that once to see which she prefers. A few months ago I thought she wouldn't want to do ballet again, which is fine with me, but she has been very determined lately to do ballet again this year. Paylesss has a coupon code of $10 off any order of $25 or more. I used it twice yesterday to order Nadia a pair of both ballet and tap shoes.

Yesterday I also signed up to sponsor an additional child through Compassion. For more than 15 years I sponsored one girl through Compassion. After Ian was born I decided to add another child - one who was also born on December 12. We ended up with Manu from India. Yesterday I selected a child born on August 7 - Luis from Bolivia. I'm hoping when our kids are a bit older that they can participate in communicating with the three children we sponsor. This morning Nadia and I went to a neighboring town's community yard sales. I bought Ian one sweater and a coloring book, Oliver two sweaters and a Steelers hat and bib, and Nadia one skirt, two pairs of shoes, four books, and three dresses. It feels so strange to be doing "normal" activities after being on bed rest for so long. I feel guilty no matter where I am. When I'm at home, I feel like I should be at the hospital with Oliver, but I remember when I was in the hospital I felt so badly for Nadia and especially Ian. I'm sure when I return to spending most of my time with Oliver, I'll feel badly for not seeing Paul, Nadia, and Ian very much. I can't wait until Oliver is discharged and our new normal life as a family of five begins. When Nadia and I got back from the yard sales, Paul mowed the lawn.

Oliver was taken off the CPAP this morning! Without any oxygen his saturation levels were just a tad bit too low so they put him on a low flow cannula (the vapotherm used a cannula). I'm hoping he won't have to go back on the CPAP and also won't be on the cannula much longer. His iv site also went bad. They hadn't planned to leave it in much longer so they just decided to take it out a bit sooner than planned rather than sticking him again. All of his nutrition will now be through the feeding tube (my milk). Progress! His bilirubin count also dropped a little more.

I snapped these pics this morning. Can you tell that both kids love wearing costumes and playing with blocks? The highlight for Ian is still knocking them down!

Room Air!

Our neighbor volunteered to watch our kids today while I went to the hospital. She was watching her boyfriend's niece, who turned 6 years old a couple of weeks ago. The kids had fun playing with Angelina. Ian took a 45 minute nap (fell asleep downstairs). I had an appointment at 2pm with someone at the hospital to submit the paperwork for Oliver's medical assistance application. He qualifies based on his prematurity. I definitely welcome the additional medical coverage. They might pay for the transfer, if Blue Shield doesn't pay. Also, with the unknowns of what health insurance we'll have as a family starting January 1, it's nice to know that Ian and Oliver will be covered. After that was over I held Oliver (Kangaroo care) for one hour. He was doing much better today. His bilirubin count finally started dropping (albeit just a little), and they had him at 21% oxygen when I was there (compared to 30% yesterday). The CPAP was still at "3" (it goes from 1-11). Room air is 21%, which means they are no longer worried about his saturation levels going too high (normally the alarm goes off if his number goes below 85 or above 95. The doctor was very pleased and thus didn't order another echocardiogram. She said that if he does well tonight, he might go off the CPAP tomorrow! WOOHOO! He also is no longer receiving lipids by IV. They might totally stop the IV fluids as well tomorrow because he is consuming much more of my milk at each feeding.

One other bit of happy news from today was that I found my bracelet that I lost in January! It has been in the silverware drawer the past 7 months! Go figure!! It's broken, but Paul had paid for the warranty last August so it won't cost anything to have it repaired. We have another silverware holder on the counter, which is what we use most of the time. Obviously I don't dig in the silverware drawer very often! I really never expected to find this bracelet, but I am oh soooooooooo glad I did, as I think it's beautiful (sapphires) plus it was the gift Paul gave me for our 10th anniversary. Another thing that put a smile on my face today was seeing that I had lost 7 pounds in the past 5 days.

This morning I took the kids to the grocery store. Once I was there I realized Ian was going to have to walk since I'm not supposed to lift more than 10 pounds. He did pretty well considering it was his first time not sitting in the cart. I also let the kids play outside while I finally tackled that flower bed (which looked more like a grass/weed bed until I worked on it today). I had been embarassed anytime someone came to our front door. The flower bed doesn't look as good as it did in previous years, but considering it was given ZERO attention for three months, I think it looks pretty good now that I've weeded it again. This afternoon I made brownies. Oh they tasted SO good. Maybe the saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" applies to food as well? LOL! It is SO nice to be able to eat chocolate again! By the time Paul came home (at 7:30pm), I was completely ready to crash. I got into bed the minute he came in the house. I can't ever remember a time in my life when this many muscles hurt at the same time. My arms/hands are fine, but otherwise I am in pain from my neck to my toes. I don't ever remember my toes hurting so badly. Reacclimating to life after 10+ weeks of bed rest is brutal, and I haven't even attempted my usual exercise yet (walking to the park). Just pulling weeds had me sweating and out of breath this morning. I also did my first load of dishes (in 3 months) and load of laundry.

Meal times are far more painful these days. It would be far easier just to feed him myself, but some day he needs to learn to feed himself. Breakfast took about 2 hours this morning. I wasn't up for another round of that so I just fed him at lunch. Nadia was the one who took an eternity for dinner (because I made her eat chicken, rice, and vegetables). At one point both of them were crying at the top of their lungs during dinner. Lovely. Karen (OT) stopped by and dropped off some yogurt for Ian today. Yesterday he pooped in his pants so I gave him a shower (which he hates). He had regressed a little in that regard while I was in the hospital. That did the trick as he pooped on the potty today.

Exhausted!

Yesterday I wore a pair of shoes for the first time in 13 days. They were rather tight, but I was able to squeeze my feet into them. Today I was able to comfortably wear a narrower pair of sandals. This morning my feet were still slightly swollen, but as of this moment I can say that they are back to normal. My feet and legs really hurt over the past week, and until today I attributed all the discomfort to the swelling. My feet and legs are so very sore and tired today, and now I am chalking it up to 10 weeks of bed rest. The same goes for my back. Even sitting is hard on my back as I was very rarely sitting all the way up the past 10 weeks. I feel like every muscle in my entire body is aching right now. Even my toes hurt! Hopefully it won't take too long for me to be in less discomfort. It's not like I've done something like attempt to walk to the park yet! I'm sure it also doesn't help that I'm getting up every 2 hours during the night to pump.

Yesterday I came home to chaos. Several rooms had been affected by converting Paul's office into Oliver's bedroom. Furniture had been moved and there were stacks and stacks of books, etc. in the dining room, living room, and our bedroom. Toys that used to be in the living room had been moved to the family room. Also, other people don't know my system for putting toys away so the toy bins were all mixed up (whereas usually I have a bin for Little People, a bin for Potato head, etc.). Plus my things from the hospital were adding to the clutter (suitcase, etc.). I was so embarassed when someone came to deliver a meal yesterday. I have always had an aversion to clutter, but I think being in a stark hospital room for 7 weeks only intensified that. Last night I wanted to get garbage bags and put more than 50% of the kids' toys in the bags to decrease the clutter. Thankfully, I didn't do anything so drastic. I did some work yesterday, but this morning is when I did most of it. I was also not initially happy with where the bookshelves had been relocated. I felt that the living room was drowning in furniture. I have now adjusted to the extra furniture that is now in our bedroom (desk), dining room (two bookshelves), and living room (two bookshelves). I found new locations for the kids' toys today. I sorted through all the toy bins. I didn't do the toybox (yet). Another thing on my list for tomorrow is to tackle the flower beds, which haven't been weeded since May. There are still stacks of books around the house, as the bookshelves are all still empty, but the main floor of teh house looks 1,000 times better this evening than it did last evening. I haven't made much progress in our bedroom yet.

Two people from my church came over this morning and spent 2.5 hours painting Oliver's room. Paul did a GREAT job picking the color. I think it looks great! Paul hung the new valances this evening. This weekend I want to set up the crib and hang some of the wall things (ex. his clock). I can't wait to see how it looks once it's all put together. I am so very grateful for all the ways people from my church have helped out this summer.

This afternoon we met Paul's parents at the NICU, as they hadn't seen Oliver yet. Oliver's bilirubin level went up, but they didn't put him back under the lights (yet). He's still on the CPAP (level 3) at 30% oxygen. That is disconcerting to me because the last few days he had been on 24-26% with the Vapotherm. The doctor told me they gave him diurectics today to see if that would help, and if it doesn't, they are going to do another echocardiogram tomorrow to check his heart. After Paul's parents and the kids left for the playland at McD's, I held Oliver for awhile (Kangaroo care). Today was my first day at home by myself with Nadia and Ian since July 3. I had many battles with Ian - over taking his nap in his bed, getting him to feed himself, etc. It wasn't pleasant for either of us, but in some instances (ex. sleeping) we need to work to get him back to where he was before the hospitalizations began, and in other instances (ex. feeding) I need to get him back to where he was after spending a week with my sister in Maryland. The last time I was taking care of him, I was feeding him so it's going to take a bit for him to realize that Mommy also expects him to feed himself. At lunch he cried so much (in his high chair) that he threw up, but then eventually he calmed down and fed himself one piece of toast with jelly on it. I let the kids watch 20 minutes of television while I pump every 2 hours. They enjoyed that! Nadia refers to it as "milking," ha ha! I can't wait until the pumping phase is over. I vastly prefer nursing to pumping. Today I brought in over 500 ml of milk, and that had been produced in less than 24 hours. Once he gets to full feeds he'll get 272ml a day so I am definitely producing enough milk right now. Unfortunately the nurse dropped one of the containers of milk on the floor. It broke and out spilled about 80ml of milk. I was bummed about that, but then when I came home the first time I pumped I got 70ml so I guess it wasn't a big deal to lose that "liquid gold" as they call it.

Nadia's 4th Birthday Interview

Last year I started the tradition of doing an interview with Nadia each year. Here is the link to her three-year-old interview as well as the results (below) of her four-year-old interview.

1.       What are your favorite foods? - cookies

2.       What is your favorite color? - pink

3.       What is your favorite cereal? – Reese’s Puffs

4.       What is your favorite thing to do indoors? – eat cookies

5.       What is your favorite thing to do outdoors? - slide

6.       What is your favorite book? – Snow White

7.       What is your favorite DVD? – “Beauty and the Beast”

8.       What is your favorite toy? – princess toys

9.       What is your favorite restaurant? – I like Friendly’s

10.   What is your favorite animal? – elephants

11.   What makes Mommy happy? – when I play toys nicely

12.   What makes Mommy sad? – when I fight

13.   How does Mommy make you laugh? – roar (?)

14.   How old is your Mommy? -  I don’t know.

15.   What is your favorite drink? - milk

16.   What is your favorite game? – Belle games (?)

17.   What do you like to wear? – this dress

18.   What makes you happy? – when he (Ian) falls asleep

19.   What makes you sad? -  when he (Ian) takes my toys

20.   What is your favorite thing to do with Daddy? –I like to play games with Daddy.

21.   What is your favorite thing to do with Mommy? – I do like to play puzzles.

22.   What do you want to do when you grow up? – big kid

23.   What is your favorite song to sing? – Beauty and the Beast

24.   Who is your best friend? – Gabby and Chelsea. I love them. ( Gabby turned 14 years old in June. She was our neighbor, and Chelsea turned 15 on June 24. Chelsea is Alexis' best friend, and Alexis is Gabby's sister.)

25.   What is your favorite Bible story? – Jonah and the whale

Ambulance Ride!

At 7:35 I received a call from the NICU that Ian was supposed to leave at 8:30am by ambulance for Geisinger. I quickly gathered my things, stripped the sheets off the bed, and called security for a ride on the shuttle. I am happy to report that today was the first day I was able to get a pair of shoes on my feet albeit they were tight. When I arrived he was wearing a sleeper I had brought in that Ian had worn in December 2009. In order to get him ready for transport they switched him from a vapotherm to a CPAP. He was NOT a happy camper, especially as it took multiple tries before they found the right size prongs for his nose. We didn't actually board the ambulance until 9:20, and arond 9:25 we took off. There were 2 EMTs in the front, and in the back we had Oliver, a nurse, Mommy, a respiratory therapist, and a nurse practioner. At the same time we were gearing up to leave, they were preparing to go to another town where twins had been born at a hospital that doesn't have a NICU, and they needed to get to a NICU asap. The weather conditions didn't permit a helicopter transport. So the NP on our trip said to use lights/sirens because there was only one doctor left at the NICU since she was with Oliver, another went to get the twins, and another called off today. She wanted to get back ASAP since she was leaving one doctor for the whole NICU. It took us about 70 minutes to get there going at high speeds. The social worker in Harrisburg told me that the insurance told her they might pay for his transport. She said I should ask Geisinger to submit the bill to the insurance. That would be awesome if that happens!

After I pumped, I talked with the nurse about his first 8 days of life. They wanted him on the CPAP rather than the Vapotherm. At Harrisburg that would have represented a regression, but in this case it was just a difference in philosophy between the two NICUs. I was disappointed because in my opinion Oliver did seem happier on the Vapotherm, and also it made for nicer pictures as he didn't have so much stuff on his face/ head. Even though they didn't put him back under the lights (not yet anyhow), they didn't put any clothes on him. They also removed his PICC line and put in a regular IV instead. The confusing thing was that when I had to sign consents they had me sign a consent for putting in a PICC line, if necessary. What?!? I discovered two changes at this NICU since the last time we were there (12/09). First, they are truly now open 24 hours a day. They used to be closed during shift changes. Second, they allow siblings of any age to visit.

At noon, a woman from church came to pick me up and take me home. Ian was soooo excited when he saw me at the front door. During the next two hours I pumped twice, ate lunch, and read books to the kids. Two men from church were here for 50 minutes of that time span moving furniture. Tomorrow two people from church are coming to paint Oliver's room. My mom then drove the four of us to the NICU. Ian got to see Oliver for the first time. I signed some paperwork and also held Oliver (Kangaroo care style). We have to wear gowns for 48 hours because he's considered to be in "isolation" since he came from another hospital.

We got back home a little before 5pm, and my mom left right away to return to Maryland. Someone from church brought us dinner. Paul went to Lowe's to buy some yellow paint. It feels strange to not be with Oliver very much, but it feels great to be with Nadia and Ian more. Last night I made Nadia eat chicken, rice, and vegetables at dinner. I also am working on getting her to stop sucking her thumb (she really regressed with this while I was in the hospital), and we are also going back to the usual rule that her special pillow stays in her bedroom (she's been carrying it all over lately). We are trying to get some things back to normal!

No, Yes, and Maybe

Napping in his high chair (8/12/12)

I had trouble getting a shuttle to the Bailey House this morning so I didn't arrive until 9am, and the NICU is closed from 9:00-10:30am during the rounds (except you are allowed to be in there when they are at your baby's bedside). The house isn't far from the hospital. If I had ankles and it wasn't raining this morning, it would have been faster to walk. I will say I've gotten SO many comments on my slippers the past two days. Some favorable feedback from Steeler fans and some not as favorable from Eagles fans. The swelling continues to go down so I think either tomorrow or Wednesday at the latest I should be able to wear my own shoes again. Yay! I listened to the doctors as they did their rounds. His bilirubin went up, but it didn't go up so much that they felt they needed to put him back under the lights, but I'm guessing he might end up back under them again at some point. We shall see. They said he gained a little weight and now weighs 3lb 10oz so I guess at some point he was lower than that. He has started to poop a little so now they are holding off on the suppositories unless he goes 24 hours without pooping. They are greatly increasing the quantity of his feeds. They are increasing his feed by 3ml every 12 hours until he reaches 35ml. He had 5ml at noon today, and he'll have 8ml at midnight, etc. I have been getting at least 35ml per pumping session so my body is in synch with his "full feed" amount. The most I ever got in one pumping session thus far was 60ml.

After listening to the doctors I pumped before heading over for a 10am MFM appointment. The nurse removed the steri strips as I was having an allergic reaction to some of them. They were pleased that I am not taking any pain medication. They understand that I will be going to an OB for my 6 week postpartum appointment. I then returned to the NICU and found out that the insurance had said they wouldn't approve his transfer because it would be too difficult to split the payment for things between the two hospitals because of the "bundling" they do with billing. The NICU doctor appealed this decision on the basis that because I am providing milk, it is medically necessary for me to be much closer to my baby. The next step was the medical director at the insurance, and thankfully that person changed the decision to YES. The last step would have been peer to peer review, but it didn't have to go that far. I felt like bursting into tears when I was told the insurance had said no, but thankfully I kept myself together. It wasn't until 3:30pm that I got the good news. I had made arrangements for someone to pick me up today (a teacher I used to work with when I was a principal). This evening they told me that the transfer had been arranged for 8:30am tomorrow, and that I was allowed to ride in the ambulance with Oliver, the doctor, and nurse. The possible glitch at this point is whether or not there will be a bed available at Geisinger tomorrow. When they called yesterday, there were a few beds available, but they had a few admissions since that time. There are a few babies that are supposed to be discharged tonight. If those babies behave during the night and there aren't more admissions during the night tonight, Oliver can be transferred tomorrow morning. The doctor is supposed to call at 7:30am to see if they have a bed available or not. I hope they do!!!

I held Oliver from 12:30-1:30 and 6:00-6:50pm today. Yesterday I held him twice (noon and 6pm) and both times the holding ended when his oxygen saturation levels were going too low (right now they want them to be between 85-95%). Today his levels were actually going too high while I held him, which meant they lowered his O2 level while I held him, which was a good thing (closer to room air). I had pumped at 11:30 and then taken his temperature and changed his diaper so by 1:30 I was ready to go to the bathroom, eat lunch, and pump. They give nursing moms a $5 credit per day at the cafe. I used that for lunch yesterday and today. The second time I held him today we took off his clothes so that we could experience skin-to-skin contact (he was under my shirt). This evening I left a sleeper with the nurse for him to wear to Geisinger tomorrow. I left one that Ian had worn. On Monday morning when we stopped to buy the slippers at Walmart we did also buy three things for Oliver - two preemie size sleepers and one newborn size outfit. As of today, Oliver is one week old!

VERY Thankful Tuesday

1. What a blessing it was to be home for almost 2 days and to be able to attend Nadia's musical.

2. Oliver went from three bili lights to two bili lights on Friday to one bili light on Sunday to NO bili lights on Monday, which meant he wore clothes for the first time yesterday (see photo at the bottom of this post). This was one of the hospital's outfits. Hopefully his bilirubin levels will stay at a good place.

3. My mom came up Monday night so that she could watch the kids today and tomorrow. It's been awhile since they spent a weekday at our house. This also meant we could get our cable hooked back up again as someone was in the house during the day. They were running a special of the first two months free (and we only had to commit to keeping the cable for two more months after the free months). We haven't had any channels on our tv working for 4 1/2 months, but we want to be able to watch football. We plan on ending the cable service for a few months again in 2013.

4. Oliver's feeds went from 1ml every 6 hours to 1ml every 3 hours to 2ml ever 3 hours. Hopefully his bowels will start working, and he'll start pooping.

5. When they saw Nadia and Paul, they were no longer worried about a "chromosomal problem" related to the roundness of Oliver's face. What a relief! I think he's cute, and he definitely takes after Paul like Nadia does.

6. His echocardiogram yesterday showed that the valves that are supposed to close after birth have all closed and that he no longer has pulmonary hyptertension. PTL! He's been able to stay on the Vapotherm, which is also a huge answer to prayer (rather than the ventilator, SiPAP, or CPAP). At first he was needing about 40% oxygen to keep his saturation levels where they need to be, but by yesterday he had been weaned down to 24% oxygen (21% is the goal).

7. I got to hold Oliver yesterday!!! The first time I held him from 12:35-1:25pm. The second time I held him from about 6:00-6:30pm. Let me tell you that he feels like a super tiny peanut. He currently weighs about 3lb 10oz. I also took his temperature twice and changed his diaper twice while he was in the isolette. I could have held him on Saturday and/or Sunday if I hadn't gone home this weekend, but I don't regret my decision to go home even though I was dying to hold Oliver.
8. I got to see Oliver's eyes a lot more yesterday since he wasn't wearing "glasses" and since he was awake more than he had been the other times I visited him. He has blue eyes like Paul, Nadia, and Ian. We shall see if they stay blue or not! It was so much easier to get nice pictures without him being on the ventilator or under the bili lights.

9. We were trying to decide whether or not to transfer Oliver to Geisinger. The transport costs $1,500, and the insurance won't pay for it because it's not "medically necessary." I mentioned we were trying to make that decision on Facebook yesterday, and a woman from church sent me a private message on Facebook saying that she and her husband wanted to pay the $1,500. I was in shock. God provided far more than I ever dreamed possible. I figured either we'd pay or we'd stay in Harrisburg for another 3-7 weeks. The doctor told me yesterday that the very soonest he could be discharged would be in 3 more weeks, but it was highly unlikely he'd be ready to go home in 3-4 weeks. She said 5-6 weeks was the most likely scenario, and it could be longer than that. We aren't accustomed to receiving help like this, but I am ever so grateful. I hope some day that Paul and I can help someone else out and "pay it forward" so to speak.

10. The doctor said that Oliver is already stable enough to transfer, and Geisinger does have beds available. This means Oliver should be able to be transferred TODAY. Unbelievable!!!! I need to find a way to get back home. I packed enough stuff for a week although I was planning to come home again this weekend if Oliver isn't nursing yet. I am grateful I could have stayed at the Bailey House, but I am really looking forward to sleeping at our house until Oliver starts nursing. Ian has not been himself lately. He is the main reason I want to be back home ASAP. My plan is to spend an hour or two at the NICU each day until Oliver is able to nurse so that I can spend the rest of the time with Nadia and Ian. Once Oliver is able to nurse I'll need to be at the NICU every three hours, but until that point I want to focus on Nadia and Ian. I am going to call the MFM office and see if I can switch my follow-up appointment from Thursday to today. If not, I'll just go to the OB for that check-up instead. I also need to find out if I can take the pump with me and return it at Geisinger once he's discharged from that NICU.

11. Two men from church are coming to move some furniture tomorrow as we transform the fourth bedroom from Paul's office to Oliver's bedroom.

12. Although my feet and ankles are still very swollen, the swelling in my calves has been going down (started to go down on Sunday). We stopped at Walmart on the way down here yesterday. I was planning to buy a pair of shoes, but they weren't selling sandals and such any more. I bought a pair of men's Steeler slippers. I am hoping they might fit my dad and I could give them to him after I'm able to wear my own shoes again. It's one thing to go barefoot at home, it's another to go barefoot at the hospital! I felt a little silly wearing big slippers, but they were functional and comfortable. In general the swelling didn't get as bad as it did after I had Nadia, and it's also going away faster this time around. I look forward to the day when it's not painful to be standing.

13. We didn't fill the Percoset prescription. The last time I had any was Saturday morning. I continued to take ibuprofen after discharge, but I haven't even had any of that since Sunday morning. In general I haven't had too much pain or had too much difficulty moving about. The one exception would be Saturday night. I had a lot of trouble getting in and out of our bed that night. It helped when I slept on Paul's side of the bed on Sunday night because for whatever reason the pain of my incision is worse on the right side. The bed at the Bailey House is much lower than our bed so I had no trouble getting in and out of bed last night.

14. I am thrilled that my milk production continues to increase as time goes by. Oliver thus far hasn't had any formula, and I'd love to keep it that way! Nadia had formula before I even came out of the recovery room from the c-section, and Ian also had some in the NICU. I'm hoping the milk I've already given them can be transferred to Geisinger, and I have some milk here at the Bailey House that I can transfer to Geisinger, if for some reason they won't transfer what is in the NICU.

15. I wish that Oliver was still in my womb rather than the NICU, but I am really grateful the heartburn is gone and I don't have to adjust my diet any more in an attempt to avoid acid reflux. It's also much easier to get comfortable in bed now that I'm not pregnant.

45 Hours of Freedom!

We left the hospital around 1pm on Saturday. The sign in my room said that discharges were done between 10am-noon, so I had asked Paul to arrive at 10am. I found out later that morning that MFM discharges don't take place that early in the day. Shortly after they arrived, we went down to the NICU. Nadia and I went in first. She was very excited to meet him. The nurse turned off the bili lights so that his skin would look more normal in color. Nadia asked me why Oliver wasn't talking to her, ha ha! Paul visited Oliver next while I watched the kids.

I was given various goodies at discharge (ex. a diaper bag from Gerber) including this cake that read "Happy Birthday" on the side. On the way home we stopped at Friendly's. I had been craving one particular sundae for months. Unfortunately they didn't bring me the one I ordered, but Nadia and I still thought it was tasty! Ian was really out of sorts. The only way he'd stop crying was if Paul held him while standing up. Even if Paul held him in the booth, Ian was sobbing. These last 11 weeks have been tough on the little guy. When we got home the first priority was for me to pump, and I almost had a stroke as we thought the pump we had rented from the hospital wasn't working. Paul called the rental company, and they told us how to get it working. Whew. The next couple of hours passed very quickly as I gave the kids a bath while Paul mowed the lawn. I also took some time to try on non-maternity clothes to see what fit and to sort through Oliver's clothes to see what preemie size clothing we had. I found that we have quite a bit in size 0-3 month (although some of it is summer clothing because he was far beyond 3 months old before he fit that size). We have more newborn size clothing than preemie. In preemie we have two suits for Sunday and 7 sleepers. I at least need to get some preemie size onesies, and it would be nice to have a couple of preemie size outfits (that aren't sleepers).

I had hoped to wear a non-maternity skirt to Nadia's concert, but I ended up wearing a maternity skirt. I was thinking how I wanted to look pregnant when I was pregnant, but four days after giving birth I didn't want to look pregnant. Thankfully several of my capri pants (ones with elastic waists) did fit so Saturday was my last day of wearing maternity clothes. It felt odd to be trying on non-maternity summer clothes. I had assumed (since Oliver wasn't due until October 3) that I wouldn't be wearing those again until 2013. I weighed myself this morning, and I weigh at least 30 pounds less than when I came home from the hospital after having Ian. I am thrilled that I don't have as much weight to lose this time around (in large part because I started at a lower weight this time around plus I didn't gain as much weight). I know the number will go down some once the swelling in my feet and legs goes away as I'm still carrying around some extra water weight right now. After that the pounds won't come off as easily, but I'll keep working until I'm back to my goal.

After dinner it was time to head to the church where Nadia has been participating in the children's musical this summer. This was my main motivation for coming home this weekend.

Even though coming home delayed my opportunity to hold Oliver, I am very, very glad I came home this weekend. As much as I would have loved holding Oliver for the first time on Saturday night, I have to say that attending Nadia's musical was one of the VERY best moments of 2012 thus far for me. She was definitely more in her element than at the gymnastics showcase or ballet recital (although lately she's been doing more ballet around the house). She sang with gusto - so much so that even though she was singing the correct notes, I could pick her voice out at times. There were about 30 children in the choir (ages 3-12). She definitely didn't know all the words to all the songs, but considering the musical was almost an hour long and she just turned 4 in June, I thought she did very well. She smiled and seemed to be thoroughly enjoying herself. A few times I couldn't help but laugh because she had added a little of her own choreography to some of the songs. There were times when she was the only one doing a hand motion.

She wasn't nearly as enthusiastic on Sunday night. I think she was tired as I saw her yawning a few times, but I am definitely glad we signed her up to participate in this program this summer. If we're still living in our current house next summer, I'll definitely sign her up again. We shall see if Ian is mature enough to participate as well next summer. He definitely has musical abilities (even more than Nadia does I think), but he doesn't follow directions nearly as well as Nadia did at his age. I came to two conclusions during the program on Saturday night: #1 I need another lens for my camera because most of the pics I took were blurry. The lens I was using isn't meant for taking pictures of someone that far away and #2 we need a video camera. Paul used his brother's video camera a little bit on Saturday night, and I took a video of one song on Sunday night. I wish with all my heart I had a video of Saturday night's entire program. I am certain I would enjoy watching that again in the years to come. So I now know two things to put on my wish list for Christmas this year!

After putting the kids to bed, I gave Paul a haircut. In the past 11 years of marriage his hair has never gotten this long. I tried to cut his hair as quickly as possible as I had been on my feet ALL day and my legs and feet were swollen to epic proportions. None of my shoes fit. I was barefoot in church. I couldn't even get a tiny part of my foot into a shoe. Standing was really painful. Even my toes were incredibly swollen. While I was cutting Paul's hair, he said this is crazy how much we're trying to jam into 23 hours. He said, he wished I could stay at home at least 48 hours. So I left a message with the Bailey House to see if I could change my arrival date from Sunday to Monday. She called back at 8am on Sunday and said that was fine and asked that I either come before 10am or after 3pm on Monday. Even with the extra time, the day was really jam packed. I hadn't been home since July 3, and I hadn't been able to do housework since May 29. I kept alternating between playing with the kids (Candyland, reading books, etc.) and doing housework (sorting through clutter, putting away toys, working on getting things out of Paul's office, etc.). And I was pumping every 2-3 hours. Over the course of the weekend my average "output" per time went from 10ml to 30-35ml. Considering Oliver started at 4ml a day and then went to 8ml a day and now is at 16ml a day, I have quite a stockpile available for his use since I'm pumping more than 8 times a day. I also finally did Nadia's birthday interview (video). I will share that with you later this week. The response that cracked me up the most was when I asked her what made her happy, and she answered when Ian is sleeping. LOL! Can you tell he annoys her at times?