We started trying to have children in May 2002. After pursuing fertility treatments, domestic, and international adoption, our daughter Nadia Renee was born on 6-24-08 (at 36w4d). IVF #2 resulted in Ian Alexander, who was born on 12-12-09 (at 34w3d). Oliver Elliot (IVF #3) was born on 8-7-12 (at 31w6d)! Three other pregnancies (in 2005, 2007, and 2013) ended in miscarriage. Our family is complete! We are so thankful for our three miracles!
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Wallpaper and Wish lists
Yesterday I also worked on our Christmas wish list. 99% of it relates to Nadia, LOL. My family exchanges wish lists which I greatly appreciate. It's always special when you think of a good idea on your own, but sometimes that's really hard and it's nice to know what books Drayton wants or what computer games Maurice wants or whatever. So I will throw it out there for suggestions before I send off our list to my family, what toys do you recommend for a child ages 6-12 months? It is nice that Nadia's birthday is 6 months away from Christmas so we can just ask for clothing that will fit in the next several months and toys for now and then for her bday we can ask for the next 6 months. Of course when she gets bigger it won't be as big of a deal, but kids change SO quickly at this stage of life! Paul assembled the johnny jump up today, and she seemed to like it although she wasn't jumping in it yet.
This morning I planned to mow the lawn while she napped. Well unfortunately she only slept in her crib 15 minutes, and I didn't know it. So I kept mowing while Paul was caring for her, and I assumed she was sleeping. The lawn hadn't been mowed in 2 weeks, and we had a lot of rain so it needed mowed. We are supposed to start getting a frost at night so I think the grass shouldn't grow as quickly. It took me 55 minutes to mow 95% of the lawn. I wasn't quite done when it ran out of gas. It would be faster if we had kept our riding mower, but this is much better exercise! I prefer productive exercise rather than just doing exercise for the sake of exercise although I do need to start doing that as well since I don't get enough in my daily routine. I hadn't asked Paul to do anything around the house over the last week in light of his midterm exams, so it's been nice to have him doing a few projects around the house today like installing a towel ring in our bathroom for a hand towel and doing some spackling.
We were supposed to have 3 guests for dinner tonight (two profs from my university plus one was bringing her dh) however on Thursday night one called to cancel so then I asked the other one if we could postpone. Unfortunately I had purchased a whole bunch of salad stuff that morning at the grocery store and some garlic bread for our dinner. One was going to bring lasagna and the other dessert. The garlic bread is no big deal as it will keep in the freezer, but it will be a challenge for Paul & I to eat all the salad stuff before it spoils. Oh well. Ironically the same thing happened to me in June only that time my dinner guests were 3 adults and 4 kids and they cancelled the morning of so I had a lot more purchased/cooked. I am not doing well in terms of my dinner guests actually coming over. Our social life is 99% of the time just we three so I am trying to invite people over more often but it's not working out so far. The ones who were going to come in June have been rescheduled for November (but only 2 adults and 2 kids this time) so hopefully it will actually happen this time! I enjoy having people over for dinner and playing games together, but it happens only a very few times a year in part because we didn't know many people where we used to live and of course that's even more true now that we have moved. That's another factor of Nadia not being able to go to work with me. In Sept I had lunch at Applebee's with a colleague one day (with Nadia), but lunch with a friend is no longer possible. Well Nadia is a most wonderful companion even though our conversations are not very intellectually stimulating, LOL.
Getting the mail was not a very pleasant experience today as there was a bill in there for $558 for Nadia's time in the intensive care. I will be calling the insurance company about this next week that is for sure! I hope we don't really end up having to pay this. We have an HMO (by choice- we could have Blue Shield if we wanted) so I don't understand why we're getting this bill as we were in the hospital that is owned by the same company as the HMO. Of course Nadia is worth every penny, but I really felt they kept her there MANY days more than necessary. The reason she was put in there was because of her breathing issues that they thought were due to an infection. She only received treatment (CPAP) for those breathing issues for a few HOURS that is it, and she didn't have an infection. Many babies are born smaller than her and many have jaundice and aren't in NICU. I really was very seriously wanting to pull her out against the doctor's wishes while we were there, and of course getting a bill like this is just stirring all that up again within me. Well hopefully we won't have to pay, but if we do, she is of course worth it. I just will give serious consideration to switching our insurance next summer as then we can also go to a different hospital - one that is closer to where we live now. I guess it will depend on if we decide to do IVF again as this insurance does pay some of the costs of that whereas Blue Shield doesn't. I know the charges were astronomical, but we pay $1,400 a year for health insurance which is 10% of the premium so that means our premium is $14,000 a year and over the past few years aside from fertility stuff I haven't been to the doctor hardly at all, and it's not like they paid most of the fertility stuff. We paid for most of it. It's just they paid a little bit of it compared to Blue Shield wouldn't even pay for blood work. I know it's only one "problem" in our economy which seems to have bigger issues right now, but healthcare is a mess - the bills that are charged are just out of control, health insurance premiums are skyrocketing, and so many are without any health insurance at all. I think limiting the amount a doctor can be sued for would be one small way to help so that medical malpractice premiums would be lower and hopefully this would translate to lower doctor bills. I am not sure what else needs to be done, but it's a mess!
Last night is the first night since Nadia has been home from the hospital that I can't tell you how much she slept. I know the first stretch was 5 hours and the second was 3 1/4 hours, but after that I have no idea. She woke up at 4:00 and didn't want to go back to sleep after I nursed her. She was ready to get up for the day. Well that was just TOO early. So at 4:50 I threw in the towel and shut her door and shut my door so I wouldn't hear her cry. I panicked when I woke up at 6:50 as I could hear sounds from her room and I felt awful at the thought maybe she had cried for 2 hours??? I rushed in only to see she was smiling and cooing at her butterflies (mobile). Whew... so I have no idea what happened during those two hours - how long she cried or how long she slept, but I do know she didn't cry the whole time as she was happy when I went in to get her. If my door is open I hear her if she coughs or coos or cries, but if my door is shut it's very muffled. It's good to know that if I am really tired and she refuses to go back to sleep that I can just leave her be and she'll be okay. :-) Of course first I made sure she had a full belly and dry diaper, but I was not getting up for the day at 4:00am on a Saturday morning. No way, Jose! I need more sleep that that.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Little Houdini
Last night Nadia slept 6 hours and then after nursing for 30 minutes slept 3 more hours. So she got up an hour earlier than normal (5:30am). I had a feeling it would be hopeless to get her back down when she greeted me with a beaming face (I have yet to capture that on camera but I sure hope I do someday), but I still nursed her in the dark hoping to convince her it wasn't time to get up yet. I gave up at 6:15 since I needed to get ready for school. I said to Paul let's make sure she takes two naps in the crib this morning. I actually had that idea yesterday as she fell asleep in my arms while I was picking out which pose to order at Walmart and she then slept in the car and while I was grocery shopping in her infant carrier. I had said last night let's start putting her down again 2 hours after she gets up from her first 45 minute nap. I was definite about this plan after she got up so early. So Paul put her down at 7:00 and she slept for only 30 minutes, but then he put her down again at 9:10am and DRUM ROLL PLEASE she slept until 10:20am. WAHOOOO! That's more like it, Nadia! It was great to break the 45 minute nap barrier. :-) Let's hope this becomes a trend and not a one time occurrence.
We should have taken the photos today as she's been SUPER smiley and laughing so much today. Even Mommy kissing her on her cheeks brought on laughter today. Oh well hopefully we'll have more success the next time.She has started to find "eskimo kisses" (nose brushing nose) to be humorous as well. What fun! :-)
I weighed Nadia today, and she's now 12 pounds 9 ounces with clothes on (and a dry diaper). After her 2 month visit I guessed she'd weigh 13 lbs at her 4 month visit, and I think that prediction will prove to be accurate. I am curious to see how many inches long she is. She's not going to last much longer in the 3-6 month sleepers - on to 6-9 month for her pretty soon! I need to buy some more dresses for her. I'll just force myself to do that, LOL. She only has one dress in size 3-6 month so far and the 0-3 month ones are getting too short. Of course the sleeves are going to be too long, but we'll just roll them up.
Paul has another midterm exam this evening from 6:30-9:30. He thought the one on Wed was harder than he was expecting so I can only imagine what he'll think about the one tonight as he is finding thermodynamics harder than quantum mechanics. If you think of him tonight please pray he'll be able to do his very best! :-)
I have one more decorating question. I received four handmade quilts for Nadia of varying sizes. The largest was made by my handbell director (Carol), two from Paul's paternal aunts, and my friend Cheri bought one from her niece who makes and sells various baby items. How do people use quilts???? I don't want to just store them all in the closet all the time. The last week or so I had the one Carol made on the floor of Nadia's room. I think it looks nice on the neutral berber carpet. We never wear shoes around the house so it's not like we're walking on it with shoes on. Is this "rude" though? I don't know if that's an inappropriate use for a quilt.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
No Smiles
Anyhow after she was fed and dressed we departed for Walmart, and I picked up a few things before our 10:30 appt (such as a padlock for our shed as there isn't a lock on it now). I also got a pack of size 2 diapers as I am finding the size 1 ones that I bought on Monday are a bit on the small size even though they're supposed to be for up to 14 lbs and she's definitely not there yet. I had her in the infant carrier in the shopping cart and she was smiling and cooing away at Mommy so I thought everything would go well for her photos. Nope. She didn't smile one single time no matter all Mommy did that usually works like eating her belly. She didn't cry (at least not for 15 minutes) but she would NOT smile. In reflecting back the times I am most certain to get Nadia to smile are when she hasn't seen me for awhile (and "awhile" can be say 10 minutes). So when I first got her out of the car she was happy to see me and all smiles. So the next time we get photos I will not do anything in between getting her out of the car and arriving at the photo session as I really, really want her next photos to be ones of her SMILING as she has such a beautiful smile. She didn't like being posed on her belly (although we did get one photo of her in the process of rolling over, LOL), but she was fine on her back and sitting up. It was easy to pick which pose to buy as not many were taken, and in most of them she had her tongue sticking out. Hopefully she'll smile for the Christmas photos! I am thinking we'll try the Sears up here for those. At least the salesperson didn't really try to convince me to buy more than I did as she knew I really wanted a smiling pose.
Aside from caring for Nadia my accomplishments for the day were to clean the 3 bathrooms and kitchen (minus the floors which I didn't get to yet), finish putting away the stuff that was on the floor of the spare bedroom (still unpacking!), go grocery shopping, write an annual performance evaluation for a probationary faculty member, etc. I'd be able to get more done if Nadia would sleep more than 45 minutes a day in her crib, but of course I also enjoy her napping on the boppy on my lap. I usually enjoy seeing her learn new skills, but there is one new skill I am not too fond of - pulling Mommy's hair. Ouch! And it's not like you can tell a 3 month old "no" and expect her to understand what that means. :-) Over the next 3 days the two projects I would like to accomplish around the house would be to put up the wallpaper border in Nadia's room (that I received as a shower gift in April) and mow the lawn. If Paul wants to start putting away the books in his office (all still in boxes), I would be happy to help him with that also. As for school projects, I'd like to select which textbooks I will use for each class in the spring semester (as those are due to the bookstore soon) and edit the 26 book reviews my graduate students wrote ten days ago before I send them on the editor of the column in Childhood Education where hopefully many will be published in the coming months.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Gorgeous!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Auburn?
I pumped this morning before I left for work and thought she wouldn't need any formula as I left 5 ounces of milk for her, but that wasn't enough for my growing girl! She drank 3 ounces of formula on top of the 5 ounces I had pumped. One thing I don't like about leaving for work early in the morning is I miss seeing her smile when I come get her. That is often my favorite moment of the day. During the night if she wakes up she cries, but when she wakes up and is ready to get up for the day, she doesn't cry and when she sees me she just BEAMS. It is just the most precious thing to me!!!! I think part of the reason she was so hungry this morning was because she only got up once last night (4:15am). She slept almost 7 hours and 45 minutes the first stretch!! That was great since the previous two nights the longest stretch was only 5 hours and that is tougher on Mommy especially on nights like Friday night when I stayed up 90 minutes later than when I put her down so that meant the longest stretch for me was only 3 1/2 hours.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Missed My Girl!!!
I left the house at 7:30am and picked up another prof along the way and headed to the University of Scranton where I had a 4 hour mtg. During our brief lunch break I wanted to pump. I asked the prof from U of S who was hosting the mtg if there was an office or conference room or something I could use for 15 minutes to pump. She suggested the bathroom. I should have found the batteries for the pump. It was a challenge. If I left the pump in the middle between the wall where the sinks were (and the only outlet) and the stall then the cords to the parts I needed to use reached just under the stall door with like two inches to spare. So I had to kneel on the floor of the stall (in a skirt) and get myself as close to the stall door as possible and as close to the floor as possible to be able to use the pump. Also this was the first stall closest to the door (the closest one to the outlet) so women coming in to use the bathroom had to step over my pump which was making it's lovely pumping sounds. Needless to say I pumped for as few minutes as I thought I could get away with. I think I got 3 ounces in 5 minutes and said that's it for now! I was ever so glad when we were reunited at 4pm (that's the longest I have ever been separated from her during the day and I sure hope it doesn't happen again any time soon!!!). I missed the gal something fierce, and boy did I want to nurse her!!! She gladly obliged being fed and snuggled, and she even waited til Mommy came home to have a big poopy diaper. Wasn't that nice of her to not make Grandma change an icky diaper? Paul watched her til 10:30 and then Grandma took over from 10:30 til I got home. Thanks, Grandma!!! On the way home I made a quick stop at BRU and purchased three items for Nadia: a mesh bumper so her arms won't get stuck any more, another valance as there are two windows and it looked funny to have one valance stretched across the two windows, and another sleep sack so that if she has an accident I have a spare one. It was my first trip to BRU since she was born.
As an aside, Nadia didn't have any formula on Wed or Thurs and that's probably the first time in her life she went two full days w/o any. I pumped Wed morning and Paul used that, and since I was with her all day on Thurs I didn't need to use any bottles. Of course today she had a fair amount of formula since I was away from her so long, but now there are 3 ounces in the freezer for Monday since I pumped today. I brought ice packs with me to keep it chilled til I got home. Thursday the only time I left the house was to go grocery shopping, and I went to the same one last week. It's nice to have a nice store only 5 minutes away! Well I planned to buy one can of formula just to have as back up for when she's being babysat in case I didn't have enough pumped milk for her.
Since the weather is supposed to be really pretty the next couple of days, I really, really want to do yardwork this weekend. That's the highest thing on my to do list right now along with getting the cross-stitch that my sister made for Nadia's room framed as well as one more of my Grandma's paintings framed. One other thing I'd like to accomplish soon would be a haircut. Boy do I need one, but I am not sure if that will happen. Of course as always there is more grading to do, but if that doesn't happen until Monday then so be it! Paul and I worked on hanging a couple more pictures this evening, and this weekend I also want to hang the valance I purchased today. I am having dinner guests for the first time on Saturday night so it's my goal to having the house as close to finished by then as possible. I don't care what the basement looks like or the closet in the spare bedroom so the boxes that are yet to be unpacked will probably be hidden there. It would be nice though to unpack Paul's books before then though. None of his boxes have been opened yet, and there are quite a few!!! Well it's off to bed for me as Nadia has been down for an hour, and I always try to go to bed within an hour of when she goes down. Have a lovely weekend!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Good News!
Adjusting Expectations
Well today is Thursday and Thursdays are the one day of the week I don't go to school. So hopefully I can at least get the grading and thank you notes that I hoped to finish yesterday done today. I guess I'll save the yard work for this weekend. I also need to run to the grocery store for a few things as well. That will be a quick trip though so I will be home ALMOST the whole day which will be nice (and it means I don't have to get dressed up today which is also a treat). And maybe just maybe Nadia will take a nap or two in her crib rather than on the boppy on my lap. I love snuggling with my sweetheart, but then I am limited to working on the computer. Another project for today is to find where the battery charger is for my camera as I can't take any more pics til I find it. The joys of moving and not knowing where stuff is. Ugh!!!
It's great fun to play with Nadia. She seems to have Harton blood in her as she loves to be bounced, spun, etc so I think she's going to like amusement parks (which is something that runs in my family). I can't wait to take her on her first ride!!! Actually the shopping mall that I shop at now has a large carousel in the middle of it and so maybe that will be her first ride. For now she just enjoys watching it as the music plays. I have been reading to her every day for five days now, and I love it! It's a dream come true to have a daughter to read to!!! I am getting good use of the bouncer these days as well. For example while I take a shower I bring her into the bathroom in the bouncer and she stays entertained as long as I keep singing to her and don't take TOO long of a shower. The same goes for the gym, as long as she knows she's not alone she's okay. :-) Isn't she just soooooo cute? Who could resist kissing those cheeks and eating her (bulging) belly? :-) I weighed her yesterday and she's now up to 11 lbs 9 1/2 oz with her clothes on. The sleeper she wore last night was actually size 3-6 month, and it was only a smidge on the big side. However there are still some 0-3 month size clothes that are on the big side still. There is such a variation between clothes that are supposedly the same size!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Reflections
20 years ago: I was 16 years old in my junior year of high school at Capitol Christian Academy in MD. This was my last year of HS as I started college the next fall. Aside from school I was taking piano and flute lessons (maybe also guitar lessons...I don't remember exactly when I took those although I do remember it was the next year that I took organ lessons), babysitting a LOT (especially my youth pastor's children who are now college students), and involved with my church youth group. I was also a serious bookworm.
10 years ago: I was 26 years old and starting my 3rd year as the principal of Cressona Christian School. I lived alone in a 2 bedroom apartment. Paul and I had been dating for about 18 months, and he was in his second semester at PSU working on his bachelor's degree. I had just started working on my doctorate.
5 years ago: I had just finished my 7th year as principal and begun my 2nd semester teaching in the Elementary Education department at Kutztown University. Paul and I had been married for 2 years and ttc for over a year. I had tried various fertility meds with my Gyn that summer and had just switched to my first RE. We were living in a house I had purchased 18 months earlier. Paul was working for his dad while taking classes PT to finish his Bachelor's degree in math.
3 years ago: In July 2005 I had my first miscarriage. That pregnancy was from inj/iui. I had another inj/iui which was unsuccessful and at this time in 2005 I was gearing up for inj #6 and iui #4 which I had in November 2005. We had also been pursuing domestic newborn adoption for almost a year as we began that in November 2004. I was starting my 2nd year teaching at the university where I am now. We had been living in our second home for 15 months. I also was singing in the church choir, a member of ladies Bible study, and playing in the church's handbell choir. Paul was working FT for his dad's company.
1 year ago: In July 2007 our dossier expired in Ukraine before it was submitted to the SDA, and we decided not to update it. We also only had a few months left of our 3 year contract with Lifetime Adoption. So we had signed a contract with Adoption Consultants and began the ivf process. In October 2007 I was having daily shots to get ready for a frozen embryo transfer of one blastocyst (Nadia!) because we had lost the other 6 embryos in August. I was also busy applying for tenure and promotion at my university. Paul was in his second year of his Master's degree program in chemistry.
Yesterday: I left for school at 6:45am and returned at 9:45 then I took care of Nadia and worked on my Bible study lessons and replied to seemingly 5 million work emails before heading to church for handbell rehearsal. I went to bed shortly after I got home as I was exhausted from not getting much sleep the previous night.
Today: Nadia and I went to ladies Bible study this morning (left around 8:30am and got home at about noon). It was my first time attending since I had her, and when I walked in the leader announced that a miracle had just come in the room. Yes, Nadia, who is 15 weeks old today, is a little miracle! Around 3:00 I will leave for work and will get home around 8:00 and will probably go to bed at 9:00.
Tomorrow: I'll teach tomorrow morning, but then I'll be home the rest of the day (yippee!). I would like to get caught up on writing thank you notes, and if Nadia takes a nap in her crib at some point during the day then I'd like to get some work done outside as far as trimming shrubs, pulling weeds, etc. I also need to cook something for dinner as tonight Paul will finish up the beef stew I made on Sunday.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Apple Tree!
- the fact that some of the kitchen cabinets open on both sides which will be nice when setting the table
- that there's a shed and swing set/slide in the backyard
- how many closets there are upstairs (including my first walk-in closet!)
- how many cabinets are in the kitchen AND I have my first pantry!
- the deck in the backyard (we need to buy a picnic table and chairs next spring!)
- ice maker
- jacuzzi tub (haven't had time to use it yet! and Paul calls it "Nadia's indoor swimming pool, LOL)
- fireplace
- central air
- an appliance hutch in the kitchen which has a rolling door (we put the toaster oven there)
- a cabinet in the kitchen that has a glass door so you can see the pretty things inside
I haven't taken pics of every room yet, but here are a few. Can you tell that a child lives in this house? She might only weigh 11 lbs but her presence is seen throughout the house To respond to the comments - yes Nadia is still congested although it's not quite as bad. It would be awesome if she cleared up when she gets off the formula. She gets about 6 ounces of formula a day on average. We tried soy formula for awhile but that didn't seem to make a difference. Once life calms down (post moving) my goal is to start pumping so hopefully I won't have to buy formula (just been using the free samples thus far). As far as multitasking....I have always been one to do a couple of things at once. Even if Paul and I are watching a movie I'm usually doing something else also. What struck me yesterday was doing THREE things at once. That was not
easy IMHO. Ironing while singing to Nadia to keep her entertained while she was in her bouncer was "normal." What felt too much was ironing with my right hand while holding my cell phone in my left hand talking about work stuff. For one thing I couldn't keep singing to Nadia and so she started crying. Almost every blog post the past 3 months has been written while nursing. I am used to doing two things at once. I realize life will still be busy as a wife/mother/homemaker, but I do think life will calm down some once the moving tasks are done (still unpacking!) as well as my workload is cut down at the university. For example I planned to type a midterm exam while
Nadia napped on my lap yesterday afternoon after I got home from the grocery store, but the file wasn't on the computer, and I didn't want to disturb her nap. So I had to stay up after she went to bed to finish writing the midterm exam.
Here are some notes regarding the photos:
The penguin themed bathroom (Paul picked out) is in the downstairs half-bath. Aren't Nadia's coats so cute on the hooks? :-)
- The bookshelf is in the living room and aside from the top shelf which has my cookbooks, all the other shelves are filled with Nadia's books and puzzles. The bottom shelves are the ones we'll use first (board books and simple puzzles). I plan to start reading to her every day in the VERY near future. What fun! My mom said I shouldn't buy her any more books
for the next 2-3 years. Hmmm I doubt that will happen, LOL.
- The monkey themed bathroom is the upstairs hall bathroom (I picked it out).
- The floral one is our master bathroom. I bought that shower curtain in 1994 and used it in Annapolis & Port Carbon but haven't used it since 2000 so it seems new.
- The bedspread in our room was a wedding present that we hadn't ever used so it also seems new.
Over the next few days I'll take pics of the other rooms in the house such as of course Nadia's room! :-)
P.S. I just thought of a funny thing in terms of multitasking. When I was in college I rarely took notes. I am a very auditory learner and remember what I have heard very well so I didn't have to study for exams that were lecture based (did have to study for the ones based on the textbook). During classes it probably looked like I was taking notes but I was actually writing letters to my mom. Well I didn't do that in chemistry class but in the ones I thought were easy I did. The irony now is that I deduct points from my students if I see them text messaging during class and really is that any different than writing a letter? I guess what goes around comes around! It's just that their actions are more blatant I guess whereas my letter writing was easier to disguise (not that some students aren't very adept at trying to hide what they are doing by keeping their hand in their bag or under their desk). Truly that takes talent! I've never sent a text message, but I would find it a challenge even if I was looking at the keys. I am amazed they can do it without looking!!