Home again

Yesterday was one of the hardest days of my life. When I woke up today I still had a headache and felt nauseous, but I felt better than yesterday because #1 I had gotten 9 hours of sleep and #2 I felt a sense of relief knowing the dreaded funeral was over. Over the past nine nights there have been two nights when I got less than one hour of sleep total - the night I found out and two nights ago. Both were Wednesday nights. Two of the last nine nights I slept well - both were Thursday nights. The other five nights I got 4-5 hours of sleep whereas I typically get 8-9 hours of sleep most nights. So over nine nights I would typically get about 77 hours of sleep, but I've gotten about 41 hours of sleep in that time span. The sleep deprivation coupled with pushing myself really hard to accomplish many tasks in a short amount of time coupled with the grief and shock I've experienced have definitely taken a toll on my body. I long for the day when I don't have a headache, feel exhausted, and/or feel sick to my stomach. Yesterday was a grueling day that ended with a lengthy drive since I had to deal with rush

hour traffic around Baltimore. Thankfully the Lord kept us safe and kept me alert even though I was bone tired and yawning almost incessantly. As soon as we walked in the door I headed straight for bed. I was thrilled to see the time was 6:00am when I woke up. I have so many things I *could* do right now as far as contacting utility companies and such to notify them of my brother's passing, but I told myself today I was taking the day off as far as helping my brother. He has been my main focus over the past eight days. Today I tackled things like grocery shopping, making a beef stew for Paul, getting caught up on my work email, entering assessment data online for my student teachers from the conferences I had with them on Monday, and editing the photos from yesterday.

Considering I drove 3-5 hours a day four of the past six days, it's not surprising I didn't feel like going anywhere today. I took the kids to gym class, went to the grocery store, and came back home. Usually I stay at the church while they are in their gym class, but we needed a few

things from the grocery store and I was wanting a bit of solitude. I brought a book to read while the boys played in the play land and Nadia was in art class. I thought I would read the book during spring break, but this morning was the first time I cracked the book open. I actually intend to finish the book over the next two days even though it's 500+ pages long. I feel like I really need some down time. I had planned to take the kids to see the musical Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Paul and I saw that Broadway show in London in 2002, and it was one of my most favorite shows ever. But I hadn't purchased tickets yet for the show tonight, and I value sleep a lot more than a show right now. My goal is to stay home until Monday afternoon when I plan to take the kids to gymnastics. I am planning on skipping the Upward Awards program tomorrow night. I'm going to ask Paul to take the kids, and I'm also planning on staying home on Sunday which is not like me at all, but I had interactions with SO many people yesterday. I just need a bit of solitude. I am trying to get myself to the place

where I can teach at the university next Tuesday without bursting into tears.

The only relative who viewed Maurice during the open casket portion of the day was our Dad. The funeral home had said they had to use a lot of make-up in light of the fact he had been dead for three days before his body was discovered. At 10:00am we entered the church (after the casket had been closed). People expressed their sympathy, hugged us, cried with us, and looked at all the things we had set out on display such as his diplomas, books he wrote for his students in Brazil, his favorite stuffed animal, three of his paintings, his walking stick, etc. The funeral lasted two full hours. It started a bit later than 11:00 because the line was so long to sign the guest book. As far as our relatives, my dad's two sisters were the only ones who came from his side of the family. On my mom's side of the family our only aunt and uncle and six of their eight children attended albeit most of them live in Indiana. Two of my cousin's spouses also attended, and the one who lives in Virginia also tead of flowers. The final song was "In Christ Alone." The pastor asked us to all hold hands during that song. When it got to the part where the lyrics say "No fear in death.
This is the power of Christ in me. From life's first cry to final breath, Jesus commands my destiny. No power of hell, no scheme of man, can ever pluck me from His hand. Till He returns or calls me home, here in the power of Christ I'll stand" many of us raised our hands in worship. 

brought their four children. I didn't see any relatives on my mom's side of the family from 2004-2015, and now I have seen at least some of them three times in the past 2 1/2 years between my mom's funeral, my dad's wedding, and my brother's funeral. It was very sweet of them to travel that far to honor Maurice and show support for our family. My mom had requested no eulogies. We had never discussed my brother's wishes since we had no idea his life would be so short. My dad went first, then me, and the last family member to share was Wendy. Wendy didn't prepare an outline or anything, and she did an amazing job. I was blown away by the beauty and depth of what she shared so eloquently off the cuff. I was just thankful I was able to get through what I had prepared without bursting into tears. I didn't read my eulogy, but what I said was pretty close to what I had written. Five friends also shared - two of whom are pastors at the church. There were four songs  - two by Hillsong United. While they sang "Scandal of Grace" we showed a four minute slide show featuring more than 100

photos of Maurice. While they sang "Not Home Yet" the nieces and nephews each placed a red carnation on Maurice's coffin. Because he loved nature, they made a bird nest type arrangement on his coffin ins

After the service, we drove about a mile to another building the church owns for a potluck meal. At that location we had a table set up with some of Maurice's books. We encouraged guests to take one. I had sorted through his books in Philly over the weekend and selected which ones I thought friends or family members might be interested in reading. Wendy thought I picked out the right amount as it seemed at the end there were only about two books left. Paul had claimed several classics on Sunday. In hindsight I probably should have saved more history books for Paul. I knew that he wouldn't be interested in books on topics like vases. I had to keep telling myself I did the best I could. It was a large task to undertake in a small amount of time, and I was also limited by space. My minivan was filled to the gills when we left on Sunday. One nephew wants to keep Maurice's walking stick; I'm glad that made the cut as far as taking it in the van. His beloved fox stuffed animal will most certainly be claimed by a niece or nephew. I believe that all of his paintings will be claimed by a friend or family member. Ian claimed an animal book from the table. Ian has been the one to cry the most during the past eight days. He was sobbing his little heart out last night as we were trying to get him ready for bed. I don't believe Nadia has cried, but of our three kids she is by far the least prone to crying in general. Oliver cried at the end of the service. He wanted me to pick him up, and as his head was on my shoulder he cried and said, "It's just too sad." The morning of the funeral as we were snuggling on the couch Oliver said, "Today is the funeral. I get to hug Uncle Maurice today." Um no. I didn't even give them the option of seeing Maurice much less hugging him. It's hard for a six year old to understand. I have more confidence though that he'll remember Uncle Maurice than I do of his ability to remember my mom since she passed one month before he turned four-years-old. Ian cried today because in November he and Maurice had talked about playing Minecraft together online. I had purchased the game on Steam the end of January (I was a bit late since it was a Christmas present for Ian), but Maurice passed away before they played together. I told him that he could play online with Adam, and that cheered him up.

Yvonne and Nathan came down with a respiratory bug on their way from Turkey to Maryland. Thus far, Ian is the only one in our family who seems to have caught the bug. Here's to hoping the rest of us escape it. I'm also praying that I will have several nights in a row of a good amount of sleep. Margie had been really sick earlier this week, but she was well enough to attend the service on Thursday. My lack of appetite has worked in my favor as far as dieting. I have lost 14 pounds in less than 7 weeks. It appears my brother had developed a bit of an eating disorder that may or may not have played a part in his passing. His weight hadn't dropped to an unhealthy number, but the way he lost the fifty pounds was not wise and might have contributed to a cardiac event especially due to the fact he was born with clef palate (although he never had the clef lip). We might learn more of the cause of death in 17 weeks. Anyhow, Maurice had been my biggest cheerleader as far as losing weight, and I have such mixed feelings about my diet at the moment.

After a ten day hiatus from using my camera, I took pictures yesterday. Part of me did not want to take any pictures. I took a few pictures at the church, but mostly I took pictures of the children outside after the luncheon. I was equally torn about having a picture taken of we three sisters. I was torn because it was the first time in 35 years that it represented all our (living) siblings. Part of me didn't want to take a picture because our fourth sibling can never in a picture with us again, but we did. I also realized it was the first time that my picture was taken when I was outside with my "new" glasses (which are about 6 months old). I've never owned glasses that turn when I'm outside. If I had remembered, I would have taken off my glasses for the pictures. Hopefully I'll remember that the next time. I'm not in many photos since I'm usually the one taking the pictures.

I'm just glad it's over. I do not like funerals one tiny bit. I totally lost it when they played a small clip of one of Maurice's sermons in the verse. I wasn't ready to hear his voice. It was too much for me to handle. We each had different times that were overwhelming for us. For example, for Yvonne it was when the pallbearers began to carry the casket out of the sanctuary. We survived. It's over. Thank goodness. I hope several decades pass before I attend another funeral for a sibling! Although since I'm the eldest, technically I "should" be the first to go, but in our case, the last went first.

Today is the day

We arrived in Maryland on Tuesday. The kids and I picked Aunt Janet up at 4:00 at the airport in Baltimore and arrived at Yvonne's home around 5pm. I've been preparing his slide show. My sisters also gave me some photos to add to it. If you want to see it, click here - Maurice's slide show. The pastor shared a video of Maurice's last sermon (summer of 2012). I am not sure how to share that here. If you want to receive it, just send me an email. I have to admit I cannot wait until this day is over. I wrote a sort of a eulogy last Friday and posted it on my blog, but yesterday I wrote the actual eulogy that I plan to give today. My dad, Wendy, and a few of his friends are also giving eulogies so I tried to be as brief as possible. I will paste below what I plan to say today. Praying I can get through it without crying. I got almost no sleep last night, which means that I am struggling today not only physically but also emotionally. I'll be grieving the loss of my brother for many days, weeks, months, and years to come, but tomorrow I want to turn my attention to other things such as doing some work for the university. Originally the kids were scheduled to be at a pottery class from 9:30-11:30 this morning. Instead we'll be at my brother's viewing and funeral. Although I've known for a full week, I still can't believe it is true that my brother is no longer with us here on earth.

"I had the privilege of being Maurice’s oldest sister. When I think over my childhood, I cannot think of any event that brought me more joy than Maurice’s birth. I dearly love my sisters, but I don’t remember their births. I was almost twelve years old when Maurice joined our family. From the moment Dad told us that Mom was having a baby, I was thrilled beyond belief and couldn’t wait to hold him in my arms. I already had a very strong desire to be a mother some day at that age and was a sort of second mother to Maurice. He even called me mommy when he was very young. I have so much I would like to say about my beloved brother, but for the sake of time I am limiting myself to three attributes. 

First, Maurice was extremely creative. When he was a toddler, all you had to do was give him a Kleenex. He would sit quietly in church or pass the time on a long car ride if he had a Kleenex. He would move the tissue in all different directions as he imagined a story. This creativity was expressed in many different ways over his life such as role playing games with his friends, his art work, drama, and imaginary play with his nieces and nephews. When we cleaned out his apartment this weekend, Wendy and I saw tissues strewn all over his desk. He still fiddled with them at the age of thirty-five.

Second, Maurice was brilliant. When he was three-years-old we were blown away when we realized he could read the Bible and the Washington Post. He had taught himself how to read. When he was five-years-old, he would ask me every day what I had learned in my college classes that day. My chemistry course was the one that interested him the most. At the age of five, he comprehended the content of my chemistry class in college. When he was six years old, he wrote me lengthy letters on college ruled notebook paper – sometimes in German. Maurice had a vast knowledge of a very diverse set of subjects. He asked for my assistance in helping pick which classes he should take at Penn, and again I was amazed at how diverse his studies are. 

Third, Maurice was compassionate. He loved with a fierce love. He deeply cared about animals and the environment. He cultivated and maintained many deep relationships with friends and family members. He was a great listener and extremely empathetic. He loved not just with words but with actions. As we were packing up the U-Haul to move in August, one of his friends made a comment about his leather jacket, and he gave it to her on the spot. Last month I was really upset about something, and he asked me if I wanted him to take the bus to my house so he could be with me. In hindsight I wish I had accepted his offer, but I had a respiratory bug at the time, which he avoided like the plague due to his sleep apnea and breathing issues. I knew he had my back 100%, and although I thanked him for that, it meant more to me than I think he’ll ever know.

He loved our mom very, very much, and I know he really, really missed her the last 2 ½ years. I am eternally grateful for the knowledge that my brother is in Glory with our mom. I am going to miss Maurice and my mom every day of my life here on earth, but someday I will be reunited with them. Even so, Lord Jesus, quickly come."

Whirlwind

It feels like so much has happened since I received the horrific call from the police at 10pm on Wednesday night. Another professor covered my two classes on Thursday from 2:00-4:45, and I rescheduled my student teacher visits for March 11. I homeschooled the kids on Thursday and Friday. Paul went in to work later than usual on Thursday; he didn’t go in to work at all on Friday, but that had nothing to do with me but rather he was avoiding a work related open house he didn’t want to attend. I took the kids to basketball practice on Thursday night. I found a quiet room to be in during the kids versus parents basketball game because the sound of a bouncing basketball made me feel like my head was going to explode in light of the fact I slept a grand total of 30 minutes on Wednesday night. Nadia played on the parents’ team in my place. I managed to eat some pizza during the pizza party portion of their final practice for the season. My appetite virtually disappeared the past five days. I have been dieting, but up until last Thursday I had to work to limit my calories. I’ve been trying to eat about 1,400 calories a day, and I had lost 13 pounds total as of sometime last week. The past few days I’ve needed to keep track of my calories just to make sure I eat enough. When I got home on Sunday night I realize I had only eaten 1,000 calories that day, which is not enough. My ability to sleep has also been shattered. I typically sleep 8-9 hours a night. The worst night was the first night when I slept for only half an hour. Thursday night I got a pretty decent amount of sleep. Friday and Saturday nights I got about 4-5 hours per night. Sunday night was another pretty decent night. Monday night I slept about 5 hours and then couldn’t go back to sleep even though it was 3:30am when I awakened.

Aside from not going to work on Thursday, my schedule didn’t change on Thursday or Friday. I still took the kids to gym and art class on Friday. However my plans for Saturday through today drastically changed. The plan for Saturday had been to take the kids to their three basketball games (10, 12, and 1) and then take Nadia to see the musical Little Women from 2-5pm. Instead I left the house at 7am to drive to the airport in Philadelphia to pick up my sister. We then drove to Maurice’s apartment. A detective met us there to give us the keys to his apartment. I saw the first six basketball games for all three kids. I missed Nadia’s seventh game due to Ian throwing up and Paul being in Kentucky. I didn’t take the boys to their 7^th games due to Ian’s illness. Nadia had zero baskets during the first six games that I watched. She scored one basket in her seventh game and two baskets in her eighth game, which means I missed all of her baskets this season. Last season she made one basket. So if you put the two seasons together, I watched 14 of 16 games and saw only 1 of 4 baskets that she made. What lousy timing! Her last season of basketball will be next year; hopefully I get to see a basket as I haven’t seen her make one since March 2018. Ian scored one basket, but that was pretty typical for him. He played seven games and scored five baskets plus one free throw altogether. I only missed his last basket. Oliver had a short season last year due to his skull fracture. He didn’t make any baskets last year. I watched his first six games this season, and he didn’t score at all those weeks. During his last game he made two baskets. The first one he was unguarded as the other team ran the wrong way. The second one he made while being guarded. So between the three kids they scored a total of five baskets during their last game, and the rest of the season the most we had in a game was one. Again, what awful timing for me!

Little Women was one of my most favorite books growing up. My fifth grade teacher gave me an anthology of Louisa May Alcott’s works. I passed it on to Nadia recently. I have never seen the musical Little Women before, and the Christian school at our church chose that as their production this year. I had purchased tickets for March 9 at 2pm several weeks ago. When I learned of my brother’s passing, I asked the music pastor if I could use our tickets on March 8 at 7pm. There were four performances – three at 7pm (Thursday- Saturday) plus the one I bought tickets for. He said that was fine, but when it was about 6pm on Friday, I knew there was no way I could attend the event. I went to bed at 8pm that night, and the musical was 3 hours long. I called Tab, and she said she’d be happy to go in my place. She had wanted to attend, but her boys weren’t interested. I was thrilled that Nadia still got to go and that Tab was able to see it, but it was definitely a disappointment that I wasn’t able to attend. Hopefully sometime in my life I’ll be able to see that musical. We had planned to be in NYC Sunday through Tuesday. The only things I had paid money for in advance were two nights at an Airbnb and 5 tickets for a tour at the Tenement Museum. Even though the tickets are supposed to be nonrefundable, the Tenement Museum did process a complete refund when I emailed them and told them what happened. I am hoping after I submit proof that my brother passed away that we'll also get the money back from Airbnb. 

I worked really hard while we were in Philadelphia. The place was a mess. He was definitely a bachelor. There was a lot of garbage to throw away and then the sorting process began. What to keep, what to donate, and what to throw away. Wendy spent a lot of the two days at his computer – seeing what websites he had visited last, memorializing his Facebook page, and trying to figure out how to change his password so that I would be able to use the computer after we unplugged it. He had two monitors attached to his desktop, and the screens were still on showing what he had been working on last when we arrived. He had laid down on the floor in front of his computer on Sunday afternoon around 2pm, and that was where he was discovered by the police at 9pm on Wednesday evening. The apartment smelled, but thankfully the weather turned milder on Saturday and we were able to open a window to try to air it out a bit. In addition to sorting through his clothes, books, etc. we were also trying to find his will that he wrote in 2012. Sadly, we didn’t find the will. We’re hoping my dad will find it in Virginia or my sister will find it in Maryland. My dad and sisters have agreed to appoint me as his executrix. In addition to sorting, I made many, many trips to a few different dumpsters. I definitely got plenty of exercise those two days. We also made many trips to load up my minivan. We had to toss the majority of his books. It was emotionally hard for us to do that, but #1 we didn’t know anyone who would be interested in reading a massive tome on say red vases, #2 we looked up the value online and the vast majority that I researched were worth less than $1 each, and #3 I didn’t have room in my van for everything. He had used a U-Haul in August. I saved a few classics, which Paul claimed. I mostly saved field guides and other books about animals that I thought it would be easier to find people who would like to read them. I am planning on having them available at either the funeral or the luncheon this Thursday so maybe some of his friends might claim a book or two about birds. I claimed one animal book for myself that I would like to read. There probably were other books I should have claimed for Paul, but we were under the gun. I kept telling myself, we did the best we could under the circumstances. 

The university paid for Wendy’s airfare from Chicago to Philadelphia (which wasn’t cheap since it was purchased the day before she flew), and they also paid for one room for us at the Sheraton near the campus. We left the van parked on Maurice’s street and walked across campus to get to the Sheraton on Saturday night. I had packed my lunch, and we ate dinner at a Mexican restaurant called Distrito where Maurice had planned to eat lunch on Thursday with a friend. The room was very comfortable. Unfortunately it was the “spring forward” weekend. Again it was horrible timing to lose an hour when we already had so much to do in so little time. I began to wonder if we were going to finish before I needed to take Wendy to the airport on Sunday afternoon, but we finished in the nick of time. On our way to the airport we dropped the keys off at the police station and bought some food at Wendy’s. We had gotten breakfast at Dunkin Donuts as we walked from the Sheraton back to his apartment. To save time we only ate two meals on Sunday. I was definitely hungry by the time we ate our chili at Wendy’s.  We had called a thrift store on Saturday to see if they’d pick up a chair, ottoman, and desk, but they said they only do pick-ups Monday through Friday. Yvonne would like the queen size sleep number bed to be returned to her house in Maryland. It seems that someone from Penn is going to assist her with that. I believe the landlady will handle having the other furniture donated. We didn’t have room for a lick of furniture in the van. I was going to take a small bookshelf. We also left the window a/c unit he purchased. Hopefully the next tenant will enjoy having that. I had brought cleaning supplies, but I hadn’t thought to bring a vacuum. The carpet REALLY needed vacuuming, but it turned out we didn’t have time to clean. Wendy hand washed his dishes (which all had food crusted on them), and I cleaned the bathroom sink and mirror, and that was it. I didn’t have time to clean his toilet, shower, kitchen sink, etc. Throughout the weekend we naturally shed some tears, but I believe we both deserved a pat on the back for keeping it together most of the time. I certainly cried more on Thursday and Friday than I did on Saturday and Sunday, which surprised me given we were actually in his apartment. And while we were attempting to find a recycling center, we both had some good belly laughs, which felt great as I hadn’t laughed in several days.

I got home Sunday night, and Paul helped unload the van. I am the type of person who feels the need to deal with the stuff ASAP because I despise clutter. So by Monday night everything had been placed either in a pile to go back in the van to go to Maryland, put away, stored in the basement, or donated to Goodwill. Monday morning Paul met his Dad in Danville. His mom had an appointment at the hospital so Pop Pop watched the kids at McDonald’s for a few hours. Paul went to work, and I visited 5 student teachers between 9:00-3:00. I also received a flower arrangement at the house. After I concluded my last student teacher conference, I drove to Walmart to buy guinea pig food, donated items at Goodwill, and went to the library. Last night I began trying to tackle his finances. I was a bit concerned because the credit cards in his wallet were all expired, and they weren’t the same accounts that he had actually been using according to what I found on his computer. I called two credit card companies last night to report that he had passed away. I had paid his balances before doing so, but it turns out they didn’t expect any payment in light of his passing. I still think it was the right thing to do. I also contacted his cable internet provider to cancel his service. I need to find out how to return the modem he had been renting. I need to cancel his renters insurance and his Verizon cell phone plan.

I have been holding off on the cell phone because I have used his cell phone (as a trusted device) to gain access to other things as I’ll say “forgot the password” and they’ll text a code to his phone. His phone didn’t have a passcode thank goodness. His desktop was on, and through Wendy and one of his best friends (Lars) we were able to change the password before unplugging it. This gave us access to all his passwords stored on that computer. Thankfully he used one of those passwords on his laptop so we were able to figure out what the hint “forests” was referring to. The only thing we couldn’t access was his iPad. It required either touch id (nope!) or a six digit pin. This morning I connected it to his iTunes account on his desktop and wiped the thing clean by restoring it, which meant I could set a new passcode. Since he had backed it up on March 1, I was able to get his photos and such back. 

Looking through his devices we can tell that his last phone call (made or received) were to me on Friday night. He had planned to eat at Boston Market that day according to the calories he had entered into the Lose it website, but according to his credit card he never actually ate anything that day. All text messages, Facebook messages, emails, etc that were received 2:08 onward were unread. The last message he read was from his friend, Aaron, at 2:01 pm. His friend asked him a question, and he didn’t respond. Similarly, he had been chatting with Yvonne and I on Facebook a few minutes earlier. His last message he typed was about how GI bugs didn’t bother him either (he said in response to something I said regarding the GI bug Ian had). He had sent us his take home exam answers, and he asked Yvonne a question about what she thought of it. She responded pretty quickly, but he passed away (or at least became unconscious) before he read her reply. 

Yesterday at 5pm they had a sort of service in honor of Maurice at Penn. The kids and I are driving to Maryland today. We’re picking Aunt Janet up at the airport on our way there. Yvonne and her family (ten of them) arrived in Maryland around midnight last night (or early this morning depending on how you want to think about it). Aunt Tina and Wendy’s family are flying in tomorrow. Paul will also drive down tomorrow. When my Dad and Margie come will depend on how she’s feeling as she was diagnosed with Influenza yesterday. The funeral is on Thursday morning. The pastor of that church is one of his closest friends, and he wanted an open casket viewing. I had voted for cremation, as we did with mom. The compromise was open casket from 9-10, closed casket viewing with family present from 10-11 (as I’m not the only family member who doesn’t want to see his earthly shell again), service at 11, and lunch to follow. I need to write a brief eulogy. We shall see if I read it myself or pass it off for someone else to read if I’m too emotional that morning. I also need to start working on a slide show of photos. We have gathered various memorabilia to place around the casket. There will also be a celebration of life service for him at the school in Brazil where he taught for three years. I can't believe in less than three years we are going through the second funeral of our original immediate family of six. The ironic thing is that my mom had one sister, and my dad had a sister plus a half-sister. All three of my parents' sisters are still alive. That means my sisters and I have experienced something that our parents had not yet experienced - the death of a sibling. Maurice wasn't even to the age yet that my parents were when he was born. This is why it's so very hard to wrap my brain around the fact he is gone, even though I just spent two days cleaning out his apartment. It just seems to be too awful to be true.

Emergency Contact

As a parent, I fill out many, many registration forms for my three children. Every time I sign them up for something whether that is Vacation Bible School, camp, gym class, or a team sport, I am asked to list the name and phone number of an emergency contact. Thankfully no one has ever needed to call an emergency contact regarding my children. Either they've been able to reach me, or there has been no need to contact anyone. Wednesday night a little after 10pm I received my very first phone call because I was listed as someone else's emergency contact. In August 2018 my brother, Maurice, moved to Philadelphia. There were many factors he considered when he selecting where to pursue his Ph.D. He had the amazing fortune to have THREE prestigious institutions offer to fund his Ph.D. - NYU, the University of Pennsylvania, and the University of Texas at Austin. One of the many reasons he selected Penn was because I live in Pennsylvania. We both found comfort in the idea of living in the same state. I have always had a good relationship with my brother, but we had

been in contact with each other far more frequently over the last three years. While our mom was alive, she kept in touch with each of us individually and then sent daily emails that kept us abreast as to what was going on in our sibling's lives. Her passing in July 2016 forced us to reach out directly to our siblings more regularly. The last 2.5 years my brother has frequently called me, emailed me, or texted me just to chat or whenever he had a decision to make such as should I take this course or that course. It's not surprising that he had me listed as his emergency contact, but it was VERY shocking to hear the words no sister wants to hear about her 35 year old brother.

My phone almost never rings after 10:00pm, and I very rarely answer a call if I don't recognize the phone number. I did pick up immediately that night. The last time I had heard from my brother was Sunday afternoon. He didn't always immediately respond to texts, but it was unlike him to go that many days without responding to a message on Facebook's Messenger. I called Wendy on Wednesday evening around 6:15pm and told her I was worried about Maurice. I asked if she could tell if Maurice had been on Facebook. There had been times in the past that he had retreated into a time of solitude, but even during those times, he'd still click like on pictures and posts on Facebook. When she realized he hadn't been on Facebook since Sunday, our anxiety levels skyrocketed. I kept telling myself that we were probably worried about nothing, but there was a tightness in my chest as I feared something was wrong. At that point my "worst case scenario" was that he had been hospitalized and didn't have access to his phone or iPad, and that was why we hadn't heard from him. The reason I thought he might be in a hospital was because he told us on Friday that he had another episode of fainting. He sent us a picture showing the injuries to his face from falling when he passed out. We urged him to go to the doctor. He did so that afternoon. She had some bloodwork done and gave him a referral to a cardiologist. She thought it was most likely a cardiological issue. Her second option was something metabolic (which could be detected from the blood work). If nothing came from the bloodwork and cardiology appointment, then she was going to have him see a neurologist. When I didn't hear from him, I thought maybe he passed out again and had gone to a hospital. I had urged him to go to the ER if he had another episode.

While I was at choir rehearsal on Wednesday night, Wendy called the campus police and asked them to do a wellness check of Maurice at his apartment and also check with the local hospitals to try to locate him. He didn't respond to their knocking the first time they went to his apartment. Wendy suggested that maybe he was with friends since this week was spring break at Penn. I said that typically when he had any free time, he liked to play a video game. I logged onto Steam, and saw that he was not active. He was listed as being "away."  I sent him a message through Steam since he hadn't responded to my text messages, phone calls, or messages I sent through Facebook. When I saw the phone call was from the Philadelphia area, I figured it had something to do with Maurice. When the police officer began to introduce two other individuals who were taking part in the phone call, my heart began to race. When you realize a chaplain is calling you, it's NOT good. However I still was in shock when they told me they had found his body in his apartment. I remember screaming "NO!". I am usually asleep in bed before 10:00pm. I thought surely this is a nightmare. This can't really be happening. I wanted answers. I wanted more information, and they were unable to give it to me. They couldn't tell me when he died or the cause of death except they said it appeared to be a medical cause not foul play. They began asking me questions as far as what did I want done with the body, when was I coming to Philadelphia, etc. I said I needed to talk to other family members and would call them back the next morning.

Paul ran to me when he heard me screaming during the phone call, and when I told him the news he had the same shocked and pained expression of NO! on his face when I told him the news. He sat on the couch and held me tightly as I called Wendy. Since she had been the one to call the police, I thought she should be the next person to know. I called Wendy. She had been the one to call me in 2016 and tell me our mom had passed away. Now I had to tell her that our brother had joined our mom in Heaven. We determined that she would call our Dad while I called our sister, Yvonne. It can be hard to reach Yvonne since she lives in Turkey, and I wasn't sure what time it was over there. Thankfully it didn't take many attempts for me to reach them, and it was close to the time they would normally get up in the morning. After that I called my Aunt Janet, left a message asking my Aunt Tina to call me, called a cousin on my mom's side in Indiana because I don't know my Aunt Lucene's phone number, and called my dad's cousin in Pittsburgh. Yvonne called one of Maurice's best friends in Maryland who is also a pastor (Mark). Mark was going to call some of Maurice's closest friends as we wanted them to find our personally rather than via a public avenue such as Facebook. I sent some private messages on Facebook to people in that church whom I also thought it would be better if they found out personally. I attempted to go to bed at 1:00am, but I couldn't sleep. My mind would not stop racing. I finally fell asleep a few hours later, and even though I slept only 30 minutes I definitely felt a little better when I woke up. The next morning my Aunt Tina called me back, and I delivered the sad news one more time.

We were told the autopsy information would be available after 1:30pm on Thursday. We hoped to learn the cause and day of death, but that information is not yet available. We might find out within the next 18 weeks once the heart tissue and toxicology reports come back. It seems they are leaning toward it possibly having been a cardiac problem. He was found lying on the floor on his back. He wasn't bruised so it doesn't seem like he fell down. Maybe he was feeling faint or having heart palpitations and that caused him to lie on the floor. I hope with all my heart and soul that it was as painless a process as possible for him. I know the Holy Spirit was with him, but I also hope that he didn't feel lonely at the time. On Friday I had told him I was wanting to go be with him when I heard that he had fainted, but Paul was in Kentucky on a business trip, and it takes 3 to 3.5 hours for me to drive to Philadelphia. Had I known what I do now, I would have taken the kids so we could have seen him one last time. When Wendy and I go to Philadelphia tomorrow to clean out his apartment we are hoping to find his will (so we know if he wanted to be buried or cremated) and also so we can possibly determine the day he passed away. It could have been as early as Sunday night or as late as Wednesday. I'm hoping that we can figure it out as we look at his phone, iPad, and computer. It is disconcerting not to know what day he died. This week was spring break at Penn. If he had passed during a week that classes were being held, his absence would have been noticed earlier. Unfortunately the years that he lived alone (in Brazil, Texas, and now in Philadelphia), this was his worst nightmare - that he would die alone and the stench of his body would be what caused people to realize he had passed away. In hindsight, I wish we had called the police earlier than Wednesday, but I know that he is in Glory now and it doesn't actually matter how long it took for his body to be discovered. I only care because that was something that troubled him when he was alive. I know his spirit went to Glory immediately.

I hope that his death was sudden and that he wasn't lying on the floor alert yet unable to get help for an extended period of time. I do realize he was spared a long agonizing illness like my mom experienced for 6 months in 2016. An unexpected death means the process of dying was quicker and easier for him than the battle with cancer my mom bravely endured. However for the family and friends I think unexpected deaths are harder to process emotionally. I actually was praying for God to take my mom to Heaven because it pained me to see her suffering. I never prayed anything like that for my brother. I keep thinking this is not happening. It feels surreal. My brother couldn't have died only one month after he turned 35, but he did. I'm sure it will eventually sink in. From July 2016 to the present I have trusted that God had a good reason for taking my mom to Heaven what seemed "early" to me. Considering she lived twice as long as Maurice, it feels odd to refer to her death as early, but many people do live beyond the age of 71. With Maurice's passing, I now see two possible "reasons" that maybe it was a blessing that my mom passed away at the age of 71. Not that I think I can understand the mind of God!!! First, I am picturing my brother embracing my mom in Heaven. I a sure Heaven would be an amazing place to be for my brother even if my mom wasn't there, but it just seems to me that it makes Heaven an even better place to be since he could be reunited with his mom whom he missed oh so much. Second, I cannot imagine my mom going through the experience of outliving one of her children. I am not saying it's been an easy week for our Dad, but in my opinion, it would have been a million times harder for my mom. I know the Lord would have helped her though it if she had to walk that path, but I am very, very grateful my mom didn't have to experience the agony of having a son die in his 30's.

I realize this is going to be a long post, but I feel the need to write a sort of tribute to my brother. I am not sure if I'll give a eulogy next week mostly because I am doubtful that I could get through it without sobbing. And I have too much to say. It would be too long of a eulogy. So here goes.

Dear Maurice,
I vividly remember when Dad told us that Mom was carrying you. I was ELATED. That news was better than any birthday present or Christmas gift anyone could have given me. I remember Mom got very, very weary of the little song I loved to sing around the house that had very repetitive lyrics "Mommy's having a baby, Mommy's having a baby" repeated over and over. It was not a creative song, but it showed that I loved you even before you were born. My teachers were flustered when I came to school the day after you were born because I only said "Mommy had a baby!" and they wanted to know your gender, ha ha! After three girls, Dad finally had a son! Dad didn't have any brothers, and he wanted the Harton name to continue.

The last few weeks of your pregnancy were very difficult for mom. I was afraid she was going to be in a car accident due to driving while having contractions. Thankfully that didn't happen. Once you were born, we discovered that your skull shape was the reason she had such a prolonged delivery. I loved you and thought you were beautiful from the moment I saw you, but I know that your unique face caused you emotional heartache your entire life.  Even the last time I took your picture in November 2018 I saw you adjusting the fox scarf so less of your face would show when I took your picture. When you were young I remember thinking that it seemed to me you had the worst of both worlds. Most adults have the good sense not to make comments, but because adults misinterpreted the situation, you got comments from them as well. I think of someone like the boy from Wonder (a movie you said you couldn't bear to watch given how strongly you could relate). It's expected (unfortunately) that kids will make comments, but you dealt with not only teasing by children but also adults saying things like "why are you angry?" when you were actually happy. To avoid these comments I remember how when we were standing in line at the grocery store, you would hide your face in my skirt. I am certain you are no longer bothered by your appearance in Heaven.

When I came home from school I couldn't wait to hold you and take care of you when you were an infant. You were my resume that enabled me to begin being paid as a babysitter for other families. Can you believe I was paid less than $1/ hour for caring for multiple children? Times have changed! I loved it when you called me "Mommy," but Mom was NOT happy when you called her "Ruth." As a middle schooler I thought it was hysterical. I think you did that in part because I was taller than Mom, and also because I cared for you in some of the same ways that she did. I had a very strong mothering instinct. Even at that age I longed for the day I would become a mom, and so I got a bit of practice with you. Because I had already reached my full height (5 ft 6 1/2 inches), mom eventually wouldn't let me push your stroller because she grew weary of strangers assuming I was your mother. When Dad was doing pulpit supply in Pennsylvania one Sunday, a woman in the nursery actually had the audacity to accuse mom of lying. The woman made a comment about it was sweet that the Grandma (meaning Mom) and Mom (me) were dropping you off. When Mom said that she was the mother of both of us, the woman responded "yeah right." Yikes! Again I thought it was funny, but mom certainly did not. I totally understand her response as I have already received similar comments when people have assumed I was the grandma of my children. After mom passed away, I loved how you called me frequently when you had decisions to make. I loved being your big sister and a sort of second mother to you. Most siblings have some spats and such, but that wasn't the case between you and I.

You were such an intelligent person. I remember how we discovered that you had taught yourself to read prior to the age of five. You were reading the Bible verses in Cubbies that were to be memorized. Your teacher had no idea she should make it so you couldn't see the words considering most three and four year olds are not capable of reading Bible verses independently! I remember the LENGTHY letters you wrote me when you were 6-8 years old while I was in Ohio from 1990-92. My roommates were stunned when I showed them the lengthy letters written on lined notebook paper that my young brother had written  - particularly when they saw that portions of the letters were in German! I remember in 1989-90 when I was attending college in Maryland that when I got home from school you wanted me to explain what I had learned in my classes that day. You were only five years old and we had conversations about what I was learning in my chemistry class. That was the class you wanted to hear the most about. It's no shock to me that you excelled in your Master's degree program at UT Austin, and I believe with all my heart that you would have completed your Ph.D. at Penn if the Lord hadn't called you home before that could happen. I loved hearing about all the amazing feedback you got in January when you spoke at the conference in San Diego. I admit I feel sad that you were not able to continue your research as you received feedback from others who invited you to speak at other conferences (in places like Australia!), publish articles, write a book, etc. You were a brilliant author. I still have your thesis saved on my computer. I feel badly that I hadn't finished reading it yet, but I will keep my promise and finish reading it this year even though you have already gone to Glory. The last time we heard from you was Sunday afternoon, and on that day you sent your sisters your answers to a take home exam. Again we were all impressed at your knowledge and also writing skills. I believe you would have been a fabulous professor or archaeologist or a tremendous asset to a museum had your life been long enough for that to happen.

You were such an empathetic and compassionate person. You were compassionate not judgmental. You loved with a fierce love. You were a great listener. I knew without a doubt you absolutely had my back. I know I thanked you, but I'm not sure you will ever know exactly how much it meant to me. That is just one of the many ways that I feel a void in my life right now with your passing. You were fabulous with children. Your creativity and skills with drama were an asset when playing with your nieces and nephews. You were a fabulous uncle. I wish they had more years with Uncle Maurice, but I am thankful for the memories that they do have. Ian cried his little heart out when he found out you had gone to Heaven. Last August we inherited some of your stuffed animals and some of your paintings that you had done in high school. The paintings are on the walls of our living room plus all three kids each have some on the walls in their bedrooms. We had enjoyed these for months, but now that you have passed they are even more special to us. Similarly, your beloved stuffed animals that were hard for you to part with are also even more treasured following your passing. Ian renamed your former tiger "Maurice." He has been sleeping with "Maurice" the tiger and a plush heart that Mom gave him in 2016. He finds comfort in sleeping with two plush items that were given to him by his Grandma and Uncle who are not with us anymore. Ian says he thinks about how you and Grandma loved him while he snuggles with them.

You had many diverse interests. You weren't really into music. You were delighted when Mom let you stop learning to play the piano. You weren't really into sports (watching or playing them). You loved animals. The fact that your email address had an animal in it (jaguarundi) is not a surprise. When you started college you first planned to get a degree in entomology. Foxes and peregrine falcons were two of your favorite animals. I loved the way you decorated your apartment with fox things and your fox scarf that you were wearing when we saw you last in November. You had a lengthy life list of birds you had seen over the years. Although your interests expanded to include history, when you were younger you weren't too impressed with my vacation plans because they included too many historical tours (places like Monticello) and not enough birding outings. Your spotting scope was one of your prized possessions. Math wasn't your favorite subject, but you loved science, art, drama, and history. You preferred ancient history over modern. You knew so much about SO many different topics. Blew. Me. Away.

You loved playing games whether that meant Minecraft or the Wii or playing role play games. I remember how excited you were when the professor at Penn asked you to do an analysis of the accuracy of a video game that was set in an ancient time. Playing a video game for your doctoral program? A combination of two things you loved! Because you never married, your friends were even more important to you. You had many friends, and I'm hesitant to list their names as I know I'll omit some important ones, but you were in several weddings as a groomsman or best man. I know you referred to your D&D group as your "found family." I am so thankful that you had many deep friendships. I know that it's not just your family who are really grieving your loss. I'm thankful that you were able to make a trip to Maryland last month for your birthday. I had no idea at that point it would be your last trip to Maryland. Although you loved to play, you were also a hard worker. You put in an incredible amount of hours studying each week while you were in graduate school. 

You loved the Lord. I am so, so, so grateful that I know your destiny was secure. I know you are with Jesus and with Mom. I miss you something fierce, but at least I know I will see you again some day. When I found that you had passed one of my first responses was that I wished the Lord would return as SOON as possible so that I wouldn't have to wait too long to be reunited with you and Mom. Life on earth can be very hard. You are freed from the emotional pain that we all go through here on earth. 

You were very affectionate. "Physical touch" was definitely one of your primary love languages. From a young age you loved having your back scratched, and that was still true in 2018. I can still picture you climbing on Mom's lap even when you were much taller than her. I am hoping my kids will be like you and still want to hug me when they are teenagers and adults. 

You loved to follow traditions. You loved to have rainbow sprinkle cake and frosting (or was it called Funfetti?) for your birthday. You were the one to pass out the Christmas gifts. We missed you at Christmas this past year. It wasn't the same without you. I only remember two Christmases in your whole life that we weren't together - your first December when you were in Brazil and 2018. Now that I know it was your last Christmas, I wish even more that you had been here, but that's water under the bridge. Speaking of Christmas traditions, I was the one who took you shopping each year, and you insisted that we visit the same stores every year in the same exact order. 

For many years you struggled with breathing issues and sleep apnea. Our cousin, Brent, was the one who made the first comment which lead to that diagnosis. It was imperative that you sleep at a certain angle which meant for several years you slept in a reclining chair rather than a bed. I find comfort knowing that you are no longer struggling to breathe or dealing with apnea. If there is pollen in heaven, I am certain it won't bother you like it did here on earth. You also preferred cooler temperatures, even though you chose to live in Brazil and Texas, ha ha! I am certain that whatever the temperature is in Heaven, you are perfectly comfortable. You had urological surgeries when you were young, and both of my boys had that same surgery. You and I both are sleep walkers. Like Dad, you dealt with acid reflux and had modified your diet and lost 50 pounds recently to reduce these issues. 

I'm sure as soon as I hit "publish" on this post I will think of many more things I "should" have included, but this will have to do for now. I am eternally grateful that there wasn't any conflict between the two of us when you passed away. We talked for almost an hour on Friday night. Had I known it would be our last conversation, I would have talked for many more hours. I am very grateful that the last three words we said to each other were "I love you." The last thing you typed to me on the FB messenger on Sunday afternoon was an affirming statement about my interactions with my children. When Mom passed I knew the last time I talked to her it was the last time I would talk to her and so I was able to say whatever I wanted to say, but I didn't get that opportunity with you because your death was unexpected. I do remember saying many positive things to you over the years, and so I just have to hope that you knew exactly how much I loved you and how much I admired you and how proud I was of you. I'm grateful we visited you in November. I was looking forward to seeing you again in May, but instead I'm driving to your apartment tomorrow morning to clean it out. Heartbreaking. I am so grateful that the Lord gave me you to by my baby brother. I wish I had more years with you on earth, but I'm thankful for the 35 we did have.

I will always love and miss you. I can't wait to give you another hug when I join you in Glory some day. Give mom a hug for me. 

Love,
Ruth

Less than 40 days left

Not counting field trip days (such as the museums in NYC, Valley Forge, Quiet Valley Historical Farm etc.), we have about 37 days of school left in our homeschool this academic year. For example, Nadia and Ian are on the 23rd lesson out of 27 for Ian and out of 30 for Nadia. Some subjects will be finished earlier than others. For example, Nadia is scheduled to finish her 5th grade math curriculum on April 16. I'll probably have her work with flashcards a little bit each day after that until she takes her standardized tests the first three days of May. I have sixteen days (8 weeks) of teaching on campus left this semester not counting final exams or the days when I visit student teachers on a day other than T/Th. Next week is spring break for all my students except my student teachers. I'm planning to observe one student teacher and conference with three others next Wednesday. I'm giving my kids off next week in terms of regular school work. A few of the days will count as field trip days when we're in NYC. The day I am working they will be at their grandparent's house. 

Since the spring break is next week, it means it's the middle of the semester. Weeks 7-8 and 17-18 are the most time consuming for me in terms of grading and paperwork for my student teachers. I'm grateful I only have six student teachers right now compared to 15 last spring and 10 last fall.

As for winter, it will technically be spring in 16 days. Considering we got about 4 inches of snow yesterday, it doesn't feel like spring is just around the corner. I think the groundhog was again inaccurate with his "prediction" this year. Given I am not a fan of cold weather, I'll be very grateful when it starts to look and feel like spring outside!

Today I'm thankful that:

1. All of us are healthy! It was a mild stomach bug. I was nauseous on Saturday night, but I didn't actually throw up. We all seemed back to normal on Sunday!

2. Paul came home after we were all in bed on Saturday night. We were all happy to see him on Sunday morning as we hadn't seen him since Wednesday morning.

3. Ian has been mostly reading either Imagination Station or Magic Tree House books for years. He finally found another author he likes - Dick King-Smith. Nadia reads a far wider variety of books, but she recently became reinterested in Boxcar Children books.

4. I was able to participate in my department's faculty meeting via Zoom, which meant aside from a quick trip to the grocery store I was home all day today.

5. The kids are able to have one last ice skating lesson tomorrow. It will be their sixth one this year. After spring break we'll be switching to gymnastics and swimming lessons.

She made a basket!

In the Upward program the basketball hoop is at three different heights for K/1, 2nd/3rd, and 4th-6th. For the 4th-6th graders it's at the full height. Last year Nadia scored one basket - on March 5, 2018. That day she played all six periods for the first time that season. The same thing happened today in that she played all six periods and made her first basket of the season! I saw her first basket last year, but none of her family saw her make her basket today. Around 8:15am, Nadia, Oliver, and I were waiting for Ian to come downstairs so we could all get in the van and go to her 9:00 game. As he entered the foyer, he started throwing up all over the place. Nadia's coach has been sending all the texts to Paul, and Paul was in Kentucky, which meant I didn't even know how to reach the Coach. I wondered if any of the teammates lived near us and could pick her up. Nadia was in tears because she didn't want to miss her game, and she said her team wouldn't have enough players for the game today if she didn't come as two other girls weren't able to come today. So I cleaned up the floor while Ian took a quick shower (he had stepped in it), and I dropped her off within a few seconds after the game had begun. Her team lost by a large margin, but she scored one basket in the first half. She said someone else passed her the ball when she made the basket. I'm thrilled that she scored a basket, and I'm disappointed I wasn't able to see it happen. I was there for the first six games, but I was with the boys during the seventh game since Paul was out of state and Ian was sick. We didn't bother taking Oliver to his game. We're hoping the it is a short lived bug for Ian and that the rest of us can escape it. Next week they will have their final basketball games for this season I'm hoping maybe Nadia will score one more basket next week. Oliver hasn't score a basket yet. He said he made one in his practice this week. Ian has scored a basket in almost every game this year.

My gratitude lists are never comprehensive. After I hit "publish" I always think of other things I wish I had added to the list. Here are a few I wish I had included yesterday.

1. My throat is finally back to normal. For the first time in over two months it doesn't hurt to read chapter books aloud to my kids. We were using Audible more than usual, and I'm grateful for that service, but it's cheaper for me to read, and not every book I wanted to read to the kids is in Audible. We finished a biography about Daniel Boone yesterday morning, and we're almost done with The Angel knew Papa and the Dog.

2. I went to the dentist yesterday afternoon for my six month check-up. My dental insurance switched on February 1st. We are back on Concordia which we had been on when Paul taught at Bucknell and also through Kennedy Concrete. When we have Concordia our dentist accepts whatever the insurance pays so we never pay anything, which is a drastic improvement. Had I known earlier, I would have moved Oliver's teeth extraction appointment to February instead of January, and that would have saved us quite a bit of money. I had sometimes decline x-rays because of the cost. I didn't decline them yesterday as I knew the insurance would cover it. Yay!

3. Oliver continues to make excellent progress in spelling and reading! He is in Level 2 of spelling, and next week he'll be starting Level 3 in reading!

4. I love it when we're listening to the radio (our local Christian station) in the van and all three kids start singing along with the radio. Melts. My. Heart. 

5. Today I am thankful that Nadia scored her first basket of the season, and I'm thankful that Paul is coming home tonight, that Ian threw up on a tile floor instead of carpet, and that he hasn't thrown up again over the last seven hours. 

Spring and Summer Plans

We might have been skiing in the snow on Monday and are supposed to get 6-10 inches of snow in two days, but this week I've also been putting time into our summer plans. I had hoped to wait until one more theatre published the dates of their theatre camps, but it seemed like I wasn't going to find that out before I needed to make a decision. There is a discount at Camp Susque if you register early, and considering how much it costs to send three kids to summer camp for a week (or a partial week when it comes to Oliver), I wanted that discount! This week I mailed in three registration forms and a check for a week of Camp Good News in July. I also went online and signed Ian and Nadia up for one week at Camp Susque. I had done Oliver's a couple of weeks ago. Week two is the cheapest for girl's camp and boy's camp, but I didn't take advantage of that $25 discount (per child) because of other schedule conflicts. I also registered the boys online for a week of VBS while Nadia is at Camp Susque. I'm sure some of the plans will change, but at the moment here are some thoughts:

• I'm not planning to sign the kids up for swimming lessons this summer because I've already registered them for private lessons at Bucknell from March 25 - April 15.
• I'm not planning to sign them up for tennis lessons this year albeit that's been something we've done every year the last several years.
• They're signed up for gymnastics from March 18 through April 22, and then we'll take a break for at least four months from gymnastics. I don't think Nadia will continue taking gymnastics unless they promote her to level 3. She feels like she's in with kids who are a lot younger than her.
• I'm planning to register all three kids for one week of horseback riding lessons the week of June 10. I'm not planning on signing Nadia up for Adventure Camp, which she did last year at my university. 

• I signed Oliver up for 3 nights at Camp Susque (June 19-22), Ian for a full week (June 22-29), and Nadia (July 13-20). It will be Oliver's first time at Camp Susque, and it will be Ian's first time being away for an entire week. He wasn't sure if he wanted to go or not. Paul made the decision for him. Hopefully all three kids will have a great time, and we're hoping this summer is a LOT drier because our sump pump has been running nonstop for the past seven months! We have had a swamp in part of our yard that entire time (as have several of  our neighbors). We're praying for a drought!
• I've signed the kids up for one week of Camp Good News in July. Last year the boys did a second week at another Good News Camp, but I think this summer we'll just do one week.
• I want to add an art class or art camp or something related to art to the calendar sometime in the summer, but I'm waiting a bit to make that decision.

• I haven't registered Nadia for a theatre camp yet. If she returned to the one closest to our house (where she went last year), she'd have to do Willy Wonka as the middle school camp doing Mary Poppins conflicts with all three weeks that Camp Susque has girl's camp. She is NOT a fan of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and that camp lasts for three weeks (half days) which is unappealing for the boys and I. So at the moment I'm leaning toward having her spend one week in August at the one she attended in 2017. It's 45 minutes from our house (one way) which isn't appealing, but the camp only lasts for six days (full days), and they're doing Lion King. There is another theatre that will be offering a middle school camp in July. If by some miracle that doesn't conflict with our other plans, I'll probably choose that one as it's about 18 minutes from our house. 
• I've made preparations for a 13 day/12 night trip in late May/early June for seven of us (including Paul's parents). We'll spend a week in Myrtle Beach, but we're also planning to visit Jamestown, Williamsburg, Yorktown, Monticello, Montpelier, Fort Sumter, the Wright Brother's Memorial, Luray Caverns, USS North Carolina, etc. We're also looking forward to a touring Broadway performance of Lion King in Norfolk! I'm also assuming that the kids and I will spend a week in July on Long Island at my Aunt's house as we have the past two years. 
• We've gone to a variety of amusement parks that are located in PA over the last few years. I'm thinking this year we'll only go to DelGrosso's and Knoebels and skip Hershey Park, Sesame Place, Six Flags, Dutch Wonderland, Idlewild, and Dorney Park.

• I've scheduled day trips to Refreshing Mountain Retreat (zip line, climbing wall, etc.), Steamtown National Historic Site, Valley Forge, an airshow that includes the Blue Angels, Civil War days at Curtin Village, Lake Tobias, Mulan, Jr., Revolutionary War days at Fort Roberdeau, Civil War days at Landis Valley Village, Eckley Miner's Village Museum, Old Jail Museum, and the Erie MaritThe ime Museum. I am planning to schedule a few more day trips, but those are the ones I've put on our calendar thus far.
• There are also three overnight trips on our calendar. The first is a 3 day/2 night trip to the Trenton area to visit Pennsbury Manor, Washington Crossing Park, Old Barracks Museum, Statue of Liberty, and Ellis Island in May. The second is a 3 day/2 night trip in New York to Fort Ticonderoga and Saratoga National Historic Park in August. The third is a 2 day/ 1 night trip to the Easton area to the Museum of Indian Culture, Crayola Experience, National Museum of Industrial History, and Lost River Caverns.

• I've signed the boys up for one week of VBS thus far. Most likely all three of them will do two or three more weeks of VBS. 
• The kids have participated in history camps offered at three different locations over the years. I would like them to do the 3 day camp at the Joseph Priestley House. Ian and Nadia did it a few years ago, but this year all three of them are eligible (and Nadia will be too old for it in 2020). This summer we're going to skip the one at the Buggy Museum (which they did last year). I haven't decided yet about the one Nadia and Ian did at the Taber Museum last year. TBD

It's been a little while since I posted a gratitude list. So here's my thankful list for today:

1. The library called me and said that a patron returned the book we had told them we couldn't locate. It turns out Ian had left it at the dentist office last month when Oliver had two teeth extracted. I'm very thankful for the patron who found it and returned it for us! Ian will also be relieved when I tell him he no longer owes me $8. 

2. Our pastor's recovery from the surgery is going much better than expected. He has an 18 inch incision in his leg. This week he received the even better news that it was a benign tumor! The first hospital had labeled it as a sarcoma, but he had it sent to the Mayo clinic, and they said it was a different type of tumor - NOT cancer! We're so very thankful!

3. Dad and Margie got back safely from a 10 day cruise to the Panama canal. We had been praying for them as well.

4. The kids enjoyed a play date at Micah and Isaiah's house today. They also enjoyed having them over at our house for a sleepover two weeks ago.

5. It was a blessing to participate in the study of 2 Timothy with some other homeschooling moms the past six weeks. We finished our study today.

6. I have lost 10 pounds in about 4.5 weeks.

7. Nadia placed first place among the 5th and 6th graders, and Ian was in second place among the 3rd and 4th graders at the AWANA quizzing event on the 22nd!

7. The kids enjoyed the Valentine's Day party with other homeschoolers at the bowling alley.

8. They learned about Chemistry at Saturday Science last week, and all six of us (including Uncle Al) enjoyed the Roadshow concert and dinner at Applebee's that night. Nadia and I were thrilled to play a small part in helping four children find a sponsor!

9. The kids enjoyed the Snow Blast event at the Methodist Church last Sunday afternoon, and all five of us went skiing on Monday!

10. Paul and his Dad had a safe trip out to Kentucky yesterday. Uncle Al was able to help out take care of the kids for 9 hours while I was at work. He took them to a pottery class at Camp Susque in the morning. We're thankful Paul and his Dad are supposed to come home tomorrow night as we haven't seen Paul since Wednesday morning.