Frozen

One year ago today Nadia was frozen. It's really weird for me to think that the sweet little girl who is napping on me right now was at negative 320 degrees F (-196 degrees C) for a little less than 3 months. I am not a big sci fi person, but I do know that Darth Vader froze Hans Solo in the Star Wars movie, LOL. Yet this is not science fiction, my little girl really was in liquid nitrogen. This boggles my mind! Successful cryopreservation first began in 1972 (with other mammals), and the first successful human pregnancy from a FET was in 1983. This delay of implantation actually happens naturally (no freezing involved) in about 100 species of mammals such as the wallaby and is called embryonic diapause. Well although I might not really be able to wrap my mind around the concept of my daughter being frozen for about 3 months, I am glad she successfully made it through the freezing and thawing process. I remember the embryologist being so happy that they didn't see any ice crystals when they were thawing her out. Ice crystals? Again just not something I think about when I think of a little baby! I guess I just don't have a scientific mind. Science would have been about the last area I would have chosen to major in when I was in college.

So if Nadia has science questions, she can go to her daddy for help. I have to brag on Paul. He just called a little bit ago to tell me that he passed FOUR of his SIX entrance exams. That's the best case scenario! It wouldn't have changed anything if he had passed five or six (yet it would be different if he had passed less than four). Going into the exams he was hoping to pass 3 (physical chemistry, organic, and math). He figured if he had time to study he might have been able to pass a fourth (inorganic). Well he DID pass all four of those even though he didn't spend even one tiny minute studying for the inorganic one!!! He studied a tiny bit at the last minute for the math exam, but he said it was super easy (for him) and he could have passed it without any studying. He had studied the most for the organic and phys chem exams. It turns out he studied the "wrong" stuff for the phys chem exam so really it's as if he took the test w/o studying because the stuff that was on there was not what he had studied. So the only test which the studying helped him pass was organic. I thought he was at a huge disadvantage as PSU had sent out the test information in early May and encouraged the students to study all summer. He didn't start studying until July 30 and honestly he didn't really get too much time to study this past week in between photos at Sears, a dentist appt, graduation party, etc. Well I am really proud of him!
Last night Nadia went down easily (no crying) at 8:30pm. It figures that she'd go down early when Paul was here but she wouldn't go down until 10:45 pm (Mon) or 11:35pm (Tues) when I was home alone (as usually Paul takes over during those hours so I can get some sleep). She slept until 12:45am so that seems to be the norm that her first stretch is usually about 4 1/2 hours. Normally if I nurse her for one hour the first time she wakes up then she goes down easily and then the other feedings are usually about 30 minutes long the rest of the night and usually she falls asleep while nursing and I put her down without any crying. Well last night I nursed her for an hour and she cried after I put her down so I tried nursing her a little more and then Paul tried rocking her to sleep. We had also changed her diaper, burped her, etc. We did all of this for TWO hours (mostly me but Paul did spell me for about 30 minutes in there). I didn't know what else to do. She was still wide awake. So I let her cry herself to sleep. Thankfully she "only" cried for 25 minutes and then she slept for 2 hours (3:15-5:15). I kept waking up thinking I was hearing her crying, but I'd check on her and she was sound asleep. This happens to me now during the day so it's not just a situation of I'm dreaming that I'm hearing her cry. Even during the day I think she's crying and then I get really close to the baby monitor and realize the only sound coming from her room is the ticking of her clock. I tried to get her to take her nap this morning in her crib but after letting her cry off and on for a little over an hour I couldn't take it any more. This babywise thing just does not seem to be working for us. It just seems cruel to let a 6 week old baby cry that long!!! She fell asleep immediately in my arms where she still is now. I guess the babysitters are just going to have to hold her. I'm not sure how much she'll sleep in the pack n play I plan on putting in my office. I am paying them $8/hr so I guess it's reasonable to expect them to hold her during her nap. She will take a pacifier for a little bit, but it falls out of her mouth so unless you stand there and put it back in every time it falls out, it doesn't work as a comforting device for her. The sling does work (she will sleep in it) as long as I am standing or walking. So I could get housework done while carrying her.

This morning she was a bit congested. I needed to use the bulb syringe on her nose for the first time which of course she didn't like. I think maybe I saw her first social smile today. It's so hard to be sure, but I had just smiled at her and immediately she smiled right back so I think it was purposeful but who knows for sure. She started having acne just a few days after birth (while in the hospital) but it got a LOT worse the last few weeks. Paul was actually concerned, but I kept reassuring him it was totally normal and it would go away. Well Monday was the first day I noticed an improvement and it has continued to improve each day. I think it will be totally gone by the end of the week. Paul noticed a big change when he came home last night. Actually he said she looked different in other ways as well. Babies change so quickly when they're so little. It's not as noticeable to me since I see her all the time, but it's noticeable to those who go a few days or weeks without seeing her.
Sorry this post is getting so long, but I wanted to add that one thing I've learned from reading these books is the importance of not switching sides in the middle of one feeding. In the Baby Whisperer book she said it can take as long as 18 minutes into a feeding before the hind milk starts which is the high calorie milk. I knew there were 3 stages of milk and that the 3rd was the fattiest, but Nadia was SO hard to keep awake while feeding her (probably the jaundice is what made her so lethargic) that I would usually switch sides after 15 minutes when I was nursing her in the NICU. If I could go back in time I would have stayed on one side the whole 30 minutes. Maybe this would have helped her start gaining weight sooner. Oh well at least now I know to stay on one side an entire feeding or at least for 30 minutes anyhow. I think the times that she nurses one hour it probably is okay to switch sides half-way through the feeding, but most of the feedings I have been trying to just keep her on one side. I want to make sure she gets the high calorie milk! The lactation nurse referred to the third stage as the "milkshake" stage, LOL.

A former GA of mine (Dan) met Nadia this afternoon. I think the pastor and his wife are coming over this evening to discuss Nadia's baby dedication which we are hoping will happen on Sept 28.