Yesterday I was chatting with a nursing prof at work. Her office is 2 doors down from mine. Somehow it came up that I was working part-time, and she was surprised to learn I had been PT since October. She asked about next fall, and I said we hadn't decided yet. She almost seemed horrified that I would deprive my one year old of daycare. She began to list the benefits of daycare and then said well you're an educator so you already know these things. I just smiled and said something like I love spending time with my little girl at home. I am not trying to bash daycare here. Some of my grad students are preschool teachers, and some of my undergrad students 
work in daycare centers. It's a very important service which our society depends upon, and I would definitely be one to advocate that these centers need to be of the highest quality possible. For example, the last 2 years I was on the board of directors of a child care center. I figured that if I still had Nadia at home when she was say 3 or 4 years old I might encounter feedback that she is missing out on socialization and such by not being in a preschool, but I was NOT expecting to hear it at the age of 1. She will be 14 months old when the fall semester begins. I cannot believe that some people feel that keeping a 14 month old at home with her parents might somehow be to her disadvantage. I thought if people were disagreeing with our decision it would be for financial reasons not what they thought was best for Nadia. The primary reason I would work part-time is because we think that Nadia being 
cared for by her parents is the best thing for her and because it's my first preference also (I love having lots of time with her!).Last night Paul was only able to keep her up until 6pm since she woke up from her last nap a little after 3pm. When her day starts too early it just throws everything off. She didn't make a peep until 5:15am, and I thought I'd try nursing her and see if she would go back down. Surprisingly it worked. She nursed for 15 minutes and then cried a couple of minutes when I put her down (she was still hungry but I think that was all the milk I had for her) and then slept until after 7:00am. WOOHOO! I went to peek in on her at 7:20 and saw she was awake (but not crying). I was so pleasantly surprised as lately 11 hours was the most we were getting even with a later bedtime so I assumed I'd be getting up very early today since she went down at 6pm. I'd say she slept about 13 hours total last night. YAHOO! So that means that the first nap today didn't start until about 9:10 which is much better than the last week or so when the first nap has started somewhere between 7:30-8:00 since she's been getting up between 5:45-6:15 most days. So it should be much easier to keep her up until 7pm tonight. Here's to hoping we can finally get back in a good groove in terms of her nap schedule. :-)
5 comments:
Ruth,
Jason and I were totally against "day care" after being relocated and no one to watch Bryce we did enroll him out our local colleges pre-school/day care program! He was 18 mos. at the time, he had a 15 word vocab. He now tells you at almost 2 1/2 that a stop sign is an octagon and has eight sides! It is the best thing we have ever done for our son. Good luck w/ your decision.
Ruth, I agree it is good that there are high-quality daycares available in our society for those who need them; and just like you, I disagree with your colleague's reaction that somehow you are depriving Nadia by having her at home! It is crazy the scoldings people give to parents regarding the decisions we make for our own children. The other day I was chewed out by my OB for not having a cell phone "as a parent of two kids!". It was as if she was reacting to someone driving around with their kids not in carseats or something. She was horrified that I would chauffeur my kids without having a cell phone. Bearing the brunt of criticism like that makes me think twice about criticizing others. :) I have also been scolded many times for keeping Susie home during the preschool years, but as you know she is not lacking in educational development as she is now reading on a nearly 4th-grade level at age 4 1/2. Not that I can take credit for her achievements-- she is just plain gifted! But I am just saying it shows that she is NOT lacking in intellectual development. And Adam at 23 months is often speaking in 5-word sentences and singing entire songs, can quote his favorite book from memory, can count to ten, etc! Again, I'm not taking credit but just saying that I certainly don't regret keeping my kids at home, on many levels (largely an emotional level like you)... but even on the "intellectual development" level which your colleague was touting, I see no problem with my kids' development thus far (although I have my day-to-day regrets of "should have done that differently," but I think you know what I mean), and I think you're doing great with Nadia too. Well I am preaching to the choir. :)
Ruth,
What better place for a baby to be then at home with her highly educated and accomplished parents! I am a former elementary school teacher who chooses to stay home with her children. Candace just turned three, but Lane is in the first grade. He excels both academically and socially, and he never walked through the doors of a daycare center. You do what you think is best for Nadia and your family, and don't worry about anyone elses opinion.
I agree with the other comments here that you need to do what feels right for your family. I was able to stay home with Sarah for the first year, and then we started having a nanny come 3 days a week. Fortunately my consulting allows the flexibility (plus Matt being self-employed).
There are lots of ways you'll be able to develop Nadia's social abilities such as play groups, MOPs, early childhood programs offered by the school districts, etc.
I'm not an opponent of daycare, but definitely feel your time with her is invaluable... to both of you!
Oh my this one is a very touchy subject for everyone. I have tried it all. With Tyler we tried one Church day care and one traditional and both left me crying. He was constantly sick and b/c I did surprise drop in's I saw things that made me shudder) We then swapped him to a home day care till I was able to stop working. Last year he started 4K and now this year he is in K doing as well as his fellow class mates. I am now back working a few day a week and a great lady keeps them here at home. It is so great that you have been able to keep her at home.
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