I called the lacation nurse early this morning, but no one called me back. I can tell my milk supply is going back down again. Nadia did nurse briefly twice today (for 8 minutes this morning and for maybe 2 minutes another time). That was the first time she had nursed for a few days. I have a feeling our days of nursing are coming to an end soon. I am very sad about this, but I at least am comforted knowing I have sure given it my best shot with pumping and Fenugreek and drinking gallons of water. The trick that helped Nadia nurse today was NOT using a boppy. I held her in a bottle feeding position and it worked, but still most of the times I tried to nurse today she screamed. I know that formula is also good for a baby although of course not as good as my milk, but I am trying to remind myself that she got some Mommy milk every day for over 6 months. I wish weaning her had been a better experience. Unfortunately the last about 6 weeks nursing has been a negative experience emotionally for me. It's hard not to feel rejected when she screams when I try to nurse her when I can tell I have milk and know she is hungry. There were many special moments though earlier so I am trying to remember those and not dwell on the negative experiences the last several weeks. Frankly I am looking forward to when she is weaned off the bottle as the bottle just represents failure to me right now. The one upside of the nursing struggles lately is that it has made it easier for me to wean Nadia off of the night-time feedings. Last night she woke up briefly at 3 something and 5 something (and by briefly I mean she let out ONE "yowl" lasting maybe 2 seconds and that was it) but otherwise slept 12 hours. I did let her get up at 6:15 since she had gone down before 7pm the night before. So that is one big success that she is sleeping 12 hours at night!!! Now I want to shift her bedtime toward 7pm and her get up time to 7am. Her naps are still not back to normal, but they were better today so hopefully we can get back in a groove sometime this week. Prior to the shots she was taking 90 minute naps (sometimes 3 a day of those other times 2 that long and one shorter one). Speaking of sleep, it's time for me to go to bed!
1 comment:
sorry you are feeling low about the breastfeeding. I stopped nursing the kids at 3 months as they were adamant about not trying but I have to admit my milk supply was low so maybe it made it easier to stop. If things do not get better you might want to keep pumping so that at least she can get your milk with the bottle, while it lasts. In any case, while there are moms that can breastfeed until the baby is one year old and beyond, many moms stop breastfeeding earlier than that for one reason or the other. Pretty soon she will be eating pasta and chicken anyway :-)
Also, I think you have had a good stretch of months when the breastfeeding went well so please do not feel like you have failed - quite the contrary. I think it is simply that Nadia is starting to "assert herself" so, as hard as it is to accept, maybe you can just cherish the fact that she is growing and expressing her preferences. Chin up!
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