Tomorrow

All day long I have been reminding myself that I should feel much better tomorrow (after the blood patch). I keep thinking of the lyrics from Annie - "tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow, you're only a day away." I honestly have no idea how some people tolerate this pain for 2-3 weeks. If migraine headaches are anywhere near this painful, I have a whole new empathy for those who suffer from migraines. The pressure is just downright excruciating when I am sitting or standing. Last night I went to bed before 8pm, and it's a good thing I did because Paul brought Ian into our bed at 10:45pm because he couldn't get him back to sleep. It took Ian forever to fall back asleep. He kept tossing and turning and kicking me. Paul went downstairs and slept on the couch. Every time I moved away from Ian during the night, he moved closer to me. He just has to be in contact with me in some fashion while he's sleeping. I usually sleep on the right side of the bed, but by the end I was on the very edge of the left side of the bed and Ian was sleeping diagonally across the middle of the bed with an arm reaching out to my arm. This cannot become a habit. I greatly prefer sharing my bed with Paul. In addition to waking me up when he kicked me, having his warm little body pressed up against mine made me so very hot. I always like to have a sheet or bedspread on me when I'm sleeping - no matter how warm it is outside, but last night I kept them all off because of Ian.

When I woke up I discovered a new symptom of my spinal headache had appeared - ringing in my ears. Lovely. Yesterday if I was lying on the couch, the pain would go away completely. Today that wasn't the case. The pain would lessen but not completely go away, and I had to take the pillow away and put my head directly on the sofa cushion for the pain to be tolerable (similarly I usually sleep with two pillows under my head, but last night I had to go down to one pillow to be able to sleep). Then I discovered more spotting when I went to the bathroom. I decided to call the MFM doctor on call. There are three in the practice and the one who inspires the least confidence in me was the one on call this weekend. She had no reaction about the spotting (quite the opposite reaction of the other two doctors in the practice). She didn't ask me any questions regarding the quantity of blood or anything. She only asked if I could still feel the baby moving. As to the spinal headache, she said I could come to the hospital today if I wanted to see the anesthesiologist, but that she didn't think I should be concerned with the change in symptoms. In light of the distance involved, I decided to wait one more day.

Paul made a trip to Walmart, and he offered to get me a coffee while he was out. The only coffee I've ever enjoyed was a cinnamon roll capuccino that I bought a few times at a gas station after a friend bought one for me once and I discovered I enjoyed it. I haven't had any coffee since I was pregnant with Nadia, and I haven't had more than 5 cups of coffee in my entire life. I looked on Dunkin' Donuts' website to figure out what coffee I might like. I didn't see any flavor options for their capuccinos, so I decided to try a carmel swirl latte. I did mention to Paul that I'd prefer it to be made with Splenda and skim milk (rather than sugar or whole milk), but I didn't know I needed to specify that I wanted it hot. When I think of coffee, I think of a hot drink. When the lady asked Paul hot or iced, he picked iced. I can't say for certain I would have liked this latte hot, since I've never had a latte before, but I can tell you I didn't like it cold. However, I drank it because coffee has far more caffeine than tea or soda. I kept telling myself to view it as medicine. I was very grateful that I drank that coffee because it definitely helped. I felt so miserable this morning that I couldn't even read or anything. I even was able to prop myself up a tiny bit without pain after I had that coffee. Trust me it was very hard to eat my cereal this morning while in a totally horizontal position. Even chewing my bagel for lunch was very painful before the coffee.

Paul's parents came up this afternoon and left our house around 5pm with the kids. Paul is taking me to a town about 30 minutes away from our home where we'll meet my friend, Cheri. She's driving me to Harrisburg tomorrow so that Paul can go to PSU as his advisor is back from her conference. He only went to PSU once last week, but he's planning to go in four days this week (not on July 4th). Tomorrow morning he's going to stop at a Turkey Hill and buy me a cappucino in the hopes it will make the trip more bearable. We'll bring a suitcase in case I am admitted for another fetal transfusion.