Green Giant

My Sunday School class has been doing a series titled "Slaying the giants in your life" by David Jeremiah. Not that I haven't struggled at times with some of the other 11 "giants"(ex. loneliness, worry, etc.), but of all 12 lessons, today's definitely hit closest to home - jealousy. Many might struggle with jealousy over material possessions (car, house, etc.) or someone else's promotion at work. I can only think of one time I have struggled with contentment regarding a material possession. I have been jealous at times over those who seem to be able to eat everything in sight and still stay very thin. That's probably a more typical thing to be jealous about. However when he said, "we are to rejoice with those who rejoice, but the jealous person does the opposite. He weeps when others rejoice," I immediately thought of my struggles with infertility and how someone's happy pregnancy announcement could bring about tears on my part. I would have said that I was happy for the other person but that this announcement rekindled the grief in my heart. The truth is that was jealousy.

Although it was more difficult when I was childless, I still struggle with jealousy at times either because someone can get pregnant without ivf or because they have more than two children. When I was single, I struggled with jealousy over engagement announcements and weddings. Although to a lesser degree, I think I also have been jealous at times over those who are able exclusively nurse their babies for a year (no formula involved) and those who can give birth with having a c-section and their child spending time in the NICU. In other words, I felt really convicted by the end of the lesson. He suggested praying for that person and counting our own blessings because when we are jealous it's as if we're saying that God hasn't been as good to us as we think He should have been. I want to make this one of my New Year's resolutions, and I want to get a jump start on it now. I actually was trying that approach when I felt myself choking up while sorting through the boxes of baby/toddler clothing. If I started to feel sad that I won't have another baby, I tried to instead just remember the times Ian or Nadia wore that particular outfit and what a blessing they've been.

I intended to add a thankful list to every post last week. I didn't yesterday; so I'll make today my last Thanksgiving week list to make up for yesterday.

1. I was in bed for 10 hours last night. I didn't sleep the whole time because Ian was crying several times (once for a very long time), but I still felt MUCH better today. I got him at 5:30am. I'm hoping he doesn't cry as much tonight.


2. I made a lot of progress on grading the language arts units today. I'm getting close to being half-way done with them!


3. I loved getting the kids dressed this morning. Sunday clothes are my favorite! I especially love Christmas dresses. Nadia has quite a collection for this year due to ones I got at yard sales and on clearance racks. I think she can wear a different one every Sunday for the next few weeks, lol.

4. I'm very grateful for my digital camera. Sometimes I still wish for a better camera, but I'm ever so grateful that we've moved beyond the age of 35mm cameras. I can take far more pictures this way!

5. Nadia cracks me up so many times a day. Unforunately lately she's been saying "I can't" a lot. I would like to erradicate that from her vocabulary, but some times it's hysterical because we'll ask her to repeat a word, and she'll say "I can't say xyz." She says the word that she supposedly can't say. LOL!!!!

6. This morning in between Sunday School and church I asked Nadia's Sunday School teacher, Saranda, if Nadia was well behaved today. Saranda look surprised and said "always!" Ah, that was music to my ears!

7. We made a lot of progress in our basement the last several days. I sorted through all the boxes of baby/toddler clothing on Wednesday and Thursday. My dad assembled two more shelving units on Friday, and on Saturday my dad and Paul attached a lattice to the stairwell so the kids wouldn't be able to fall through the side of it. If we end up living in this house long term, I'd like to finish the basement, but until that point we've made our unfinished basement a lot safer for the kids.